Previously posted on Divorce/Separation, but also posting here for more traffic.
ExP and I have been separated for three years, since DD was three.
In case it is considered relevant (and I'm genuinely unsure if it is or not), ExP is also female - ie we were a two-mum family. I am DD's biological mum.
I was the main carer during our relationship. Since separating, we have had varying access arrangements ranging from ExP having very little, to having 50%. She has always been keen to remain in DD's life.
DD has only ever been away from me with ExP for a week at a time when she was 4. She coped but did miss me, according to ExP. Usually she is only away from me for between one and three nights at a time. She has never shown any emotional distress about being away from ExP for longer periods of time - but is always happy to be with her, as far as I can tell.
ExP wants to change arrangements so that over the summer school holidays, DD who will be seven by then will spend three weeks in a block with each of us in turn.
My question is, will my DD be OK emotionally, or should I negotiate a shorter time block away from me eg one to two weeks?
I've tried to remember back to when I was seven. I think I would have hated to be left with my father for three weeks (or even less) - but I think I would have been just fine if left with my grandparents. So that line of thinking hasn't really helped me, except that I've always thought of ExP as having more like a grandparent relationship with DD than a mother relationship.
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AIBU?
AIBU to worry that three weeks away from me will be too much for my DD when she is seven?
22 replies
gingercat2 · 08/02/2014 13:15
OP posts:
LaCerbiatta ·
08/02/2014 20:01
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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