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AIBU Children pushing noisy chairs?

(43 Posts)
Cutiecat Wed 05-Feb-14 10:25:10

At our local village coffee morning several toddlers, including the children of my friends, were pushing chairs around noisily on the wooden floor making an awful noise. I had my toddler with me who was doing something else. I went over and took the chairs from the children saying, 'thank you for your help, I will put these away now' and I stacked the spare chairs.

One little girl burst into tears and so I said to her mother, who I do not know but see regularly, that i didn't mean to upset her but the noise was really awful in a friendly manner. The woman blanked me and said to her daughter 'I know you were only trying to help' as if I have been really unfair to her.

AIBU in thinking that sometimes children need to be told that something they are doing is unacceptable or was IBU to have spoken like this to other people's children.

Seff Wed 05-Feb-14 10:26:55

Is making a noise classed as unacceptable?

puntasticusername Wed 05-Feb-14 10:27:37

YABU. Look at it from the kids' point of view. You've told them off for doing something that was doing no real harm whatsoever (unless it was somehow damaging the floor or chairs, I guess).

Of course they're going to be upset.

ilovepowerhoop Wed 05-Feb-14 10:28:18

you big meanie

ScrabbleBabble Wed 05-Feb-14 10:28:22

It sounds like they were trying to put the chairs away rather than scraping them on the floor for entertainment?

Even if they were being very slow - YABU for snatching off them.

puntasticusername Wed 05-Feb-14 10:29:09

Sorry, not "told them off" maybe, but stopped them doing the activity, in a disapproving fashion smile

hiddenhome Wed 05-Feb-14 10:29:10

Yes, of course they need to be told, but a lot of people these days seem to treat their children like precious little flowers who must never be upset in any way hmm

The parents are gonna love the teenage years of course and these delicate buds are going to grow into hellish, entitled adults.

Parents need to realise that treating your child like an ickle pet isn't doing society any good whatsoever. We're already feeling the effects now, God help us in 20 years.

puntasticusername Wed 05-Feb-14 10:30:05

hiddenhome <yawn>

UriGeller Wed 05-Feb-14 10:32:01

Noise? Kids? How very dare they??.

YABU of course you spoilsport.

Indigoviolet3 Wed 05-Feb-14 10:32:18

YANBU! I can't stand that horrible scraping noise and it drives me mad when the parent is not taking a blind bit of notice!

Cutiecat Wed 05-Feb-14 10:32:22

Just to clarify I did not snatch the chairs off the children. I explained nicely I was going to put them away and thanked them for helping me. I do think that the noise of 4 chairs being pushed along the floor noisily is unacceptable, especially to the other people in the hall who have come in for a coffee without children. There were other toys for them to play with.

Maybe I am just a big meanie.

SaucyJack Wed 05-Feb-14 10:35:30


It's a fucking horrible noise. No need for anyone of any age to be making it.

feesh Wed 05-Feb-14 10:37:16

Depends how old they were. I let my toddlers get away with it as they're only 14 months and they don't understand (but love pushing stuff), but once they're old enough I would stop them. No idea if that's right or not, I am feeling my way in the dark with this parenting thing!

puntasticusername Wed 05-Feb-14 10:40:01

If you'd given them another five minutes, they'd have got bored of it anyway.

Or just stood a little way in front of them waving an enticing toy...

MotheringShites Wed 05-Feb-14 10:42:22

YANBU. Of course kids will be noisy but the noise of a chair scraping across the floor is intolerable. Like nails on a blackboard.

At my regulars toddler group the helpers always stopped the kids from doing this.

CoffeeTea103 Wed 05-Feb-14 10:43:14

Yanbu, couldn't agree with hiddenhome more !

BabyDubsEverywhere Wed 05-Feb-14 10:44:52

I seem oblivious to this sort of thing, I don't get annoyed by such noises... I'd just talk louder and carry on. I wouldn't be annoyed at you for stopping my toddler though, as it clearly was bothering you. If they were upset I would have distracted them with something else. YANBUBNTRAL (...but need to relax a little?)

Mim78 Wed 05-Feb-14 10:55:08

In theory yanbu although there a million variations as to how it could have appeared to child/mum.

Perhaps mum was not trying to criticise you but just reassure her child?

KatherineSwynford Wed 05-Feb-14 10:59:52


I really wouldn't have been able to handle that noise, particularly if everyone else started raising their noise levels to be heard over the top.

I think that some people are particularly noise sensitive, and other people will not know what we're talking about. My DC are the same so I would have wanted it to stop as much for them as for mme.

Freyalright Wed 05-Feb-14 11:21:22

YANBU, children shouldn't be allowed to run riot at the expense of everyone else. It's ok if the mum wants that to happen in her own home but not in public. I had this in a restaurant so annoying.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit Wed 05-Feb-14 11:26:22

Village coffee morning? Is this code for toddler group?

softlysoftly Wed 05-Feb-14 11:30:47

Hmmm well the noise is annoying. Our music group the kids help put the chairs away at the end which is 10 m of horrific scraping which I would stop if it was just playing rather than clearing iyswim. But I do think you sound a little prim in your manner not sure if I would have directly spoken to the kids unless it was a child of a friend?

However Ialso think the other mother was just calming her quite young child so for that yabu, I hate being expected to discipline my child based on someone else's expectations.

So there you go yanbu and yabu <<gets splinters>>

IneedAsockamnesty Wed 05-Feb-14 11:32:40

I'm confused,were the children recklessly pushing the chairs around all over the place with wild abandonment

Or were they attempting to relocate the chairs as they were not in use?

Cutiecat Wed 05-Feb-14 13:17:38

HopALongOn - Church run coffee morning group. Not advertised as a toddler group but they have a box of toys. Other people there who are elderly or do not have small children.

Sockreturningpixie - Pushing with wild abandonment in circles, not pushing to where the chairs are stacked.

I am not normally a meanie.

FrenchJunebug Wed 05-Feb-14 13:34:58

YANBU public place toddlers have to learn to respect the wellbeing of others. I would have told my toddler to be quieter too.

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