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To be really touched that DStD sent me an FB message saying I had neglected her 30th birthday?

(131 Posts)
MammaTJ Fri 31-Jan-14 21:22:24

I am amazed by this event! I was her StM from age 9 to 18 and loved her totally! She messaged me informing I was lacking on the 30th birthday front! I told her I love her and she is further ahead at 30 than I was! She is my eldest DDs older sister so has that place as well as the one she h

Gruntfuttock Sun 02-Feb-14 20:58:41

I still don't understand why you wouldn't even have sent her a card. That's very quick and easy and would have been a nice thing to do for the stepdaughter about whom you care so much.

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 02-Feb-14 20:56:25

So you don't understand her post.
Still, is there any reason for being so nasty? MamaTJ is one of our nicest posters, and I've never seen her be so rude to other people.

MammaTJ Sun 02-Feb-14 20:20:43

No! I have always bothered but felt as though it wasn't appreciated! I was a little later bothering this year, due to being busy with young DC. I was surprised and touched that she noticed! I feel encouraged to continue with me efforts ( which include all cakes for youngest child's christening) !

She is not hurt or upset by this, I rang her and we had a good long chat!i explained why I had not messaged her before, and unlike some of you , she understood

HyvaPaiva Sun 02-Feb-14 18:10:30

I never bother with my stepdaughter.
She never notices that I never bother.
This year she noticed that I never bothered!

^ That's what I made of it. Is that right? Jesus. hmm

MusicalEndorphins Sun 02-Feb-14 18:04:54

That eternal student stuff paid off. ;)

ToffeeOwnsTheSausage Sun 02-Feb-14 11:56:55

I think we all understood what the OP meant hmm. It just seems ridiculous to be happy someone felt neglected.

Bunbaker Sat 01-Feb-14 16:57:02

"theeternalstudent has summed it up better than I could!"

Clearly she has because that certainly wasn't the impression I got from your posts.

hippity Sat 01-Feb-14 15:19:27

I think anyone who has looked after a challenging teenager who is not their own child looks forward to the day when they actively contact you to let you know they want you in their life when it has always seemed like you would have to wait for your rewards in heaven grin. Well done Mamma TJ!

thornrose Sat 01-Feb-14 14:44:57

I get it, when the word "neglected" isn't taken too literally.

WelshMoth Sat 01-Feb-14 14:41:47

Not sure what you're getting at OP.


MrsClauswearsspanx Sat 01-Feb-14 14:40:16

Saying she's "touched" that her DSD felt "neglected" is rather strange wording.

MammaTJ Sat 01-Feb-14 14:38:36

theeternalstudent has summed it up better than I could!

PipkinsPal Sat 01-Feb-14 14:34:19

Did she mean that you just didn't post Happy Birthday on her Facebook page even though you had sent her a card?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Sat 01-Feb-14 14:32:50

I agree. I get ya

theeternalstudent Sat 01-Feb-14 14:28:35

I understand you MammaTJ. You were planning to wish your DsD a happy birthday but just hadn't got round to it yet, you hadn't missed her birthday. The message from DsD was to say she was missing having you around to celebrate with her. You were touched as over the years she has rejected you. The message showed that you were important to her.

Not so difficult to understand. thanks for you and cake for your dsd!

lougle Sat 01-Feb-14 14:16:08

I'm glad that your DSD reassured you on her birthday that she loved you, OP.

That, after all, is the reason we have birthdays, so that when people forget, we can remind them that we love them.

If your DSD phoning you to remind you of her birthday is seen as 'progress' by you, then I'm sorry that this is the extent of your relationship.

ummingandahhing Sat 01-Feb-14 14:15:10

MNetters stop it. This thread is making me laugh like a mad thing on the Tube. grin

Floralnomad Sat 01-Feb-14 14:10:36

If you love her so much why do you not bother to send her a birthday card ? It makes no sense at all .

ssd Sat 01-Feb-14 14:04:36





ToffeeOwnsTheSausage Sat 01-Feb-14 14:02:08

OP cares that DSD missed her, I think. Bit strange though to post about it and for OP to be so dramatic about this girl "having her heart" and "knowing where she is with her."

Salmotrutta Sat 01-Feb-14 13:58:56


Do you find people avoid you UncleT?


Olivegirl Sat 01-Feb-14 13:49:45


fanjoforthemammaries7850 Sat 01-Feb-14 13:31:40

How rude

UncleT Sat 01-Feb-14 13:28:27

What an unbelievable load of twaddle! This thread is a pile of steaming elephant dung, but well done for attracting over 100 replies.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Sat 01-Feb-14 12:57:41

Surely OP just means she was glad her DSD noticed after they have had a challenging relationship.

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