to think that as children get older they can't get *that* much more expensive?

[shhhw]

OK, laugh me off the planet. But everyone recites this mantra constantly - that they get much more expensive as they get older. How, exactly? I am already paying for 2 lots of music lessons, ballet lessons, riding lessons, school trips, presents to take to constant birthday parties, shoes and more shoes, clothes etc etc etc. So if I choose to be mean with pocket money, where does the huge expense come? And when does it kick in?

[ihatethecold]

FOOD!!

[JeanSeberg]

Means-tested university loan....

[IneedAwittierNickname]

Clothes cost more as they get bigger imo. And shoes!

[newgirl]

i think mine have got more affordable - school clubs now are free, trips less frequent - though when they come along they are more expensive.

But yes they eat a lot more :)

[Electryone]

Even more expensive clothes, taxi fares or petrol if you take them, food, driving lessons eventually(although my DS1 was lucky to have a pt job and paid for his own)

[Sparklingbrook]

Food food and more food
Pocket money
Mobile phone contracts
Adult sized clothing grown out of within a month same with shoes.
School trips that cost £1200
School uniform and sports kits grown out of every term.
Money for going out.
Petrol spent driving them about to football/town/friends
Gadgets for Christmas/Birthday

[NotEnoughTime]

Clothes and trainers-(Unfortunately!) as they get older they become more aware of labels and brands. Of course, you don't have to go along with this but it can lead to your child being teased or feeling left out as obviously MOST kids want to fit in with their peer group.

Again, school trips are a lot dearer as they get older.

[shhhw]

Yes, yes, JeanS, and I am just waiting for driving lessons to get mentioned (though I had to save up and pay for my own...) but I mean while they are still strictly speaking children - i.e. up to 16...

(ihatethecold - I am hoping to save on food in that as they grow I will need less childcare help from my parents, who share meals with us on the days they help, so fingers crossed that will balance it a bit... Plus I have girls not boys so am hoping they are a bit less hungry than some boys I know...)

[Impatientismymiddlename]

As they become teenagers their clothes become more expensive, they ask for more gadgets, they need bus fare to get to school, they need more dinner money than what primary school meals cost, their shoes cost more, they need proper sports shoes, they eat more food, they need more toiletries, they like to be able to go out with their mates and that costs money.....
Then they go to uni and they need help with their living costs.

[MrsJoeHart]

Ha, ha, ha, ha

Pocket money goes up, mine get £5 a week, so that's £60 a month and tbh dd1 at 14 should probably get a bit more.

School bus fairs for secondary, next year when dc3 leaves primary will cost me £120 per month.

All clothes and shoes are adult sizes, even my 11 year old DS wear a size 7 shoe. Factor in trainers for school. Trainers for home, boots for winter, sandles for summer and assorted other footwear times three children and that's before the clothes.

Laptops, mobile phones (and monthly contracts), trips out with their friends etc all much more expensive than Polly pockets/Thomas etc.

As for the food - I'm feeding five adults really.

[NameyMcChanger]

My 12 yo is cracking on for 6ft and I've been paying adult prices for clothes since he was 10........oh yes. Kids GROW, they eat lots and the sad fact is the day will come when you're shelling out to pay the costs of another adult in the household.

[Sparklingbrook]

Forgot school bus fares. DS1's is £540 a year.

[KatharineHepburnsTrousers]

When they turn into teenagers you may as well give them your debit card and ask them for pocket money.

The activities get more expensive, petrol to take them here, there and everywhere, then when they are 16 or 17 cost of providing their own transport (which of course isn't obligatory but you'll do anything to prevent driving them around).

They grow like weeds. They eat like locusts (not just them, but their friends). Then you have to pay for their universitY living costs because if you earn above a certain amount they do not get the full loan.

They do get jobs (or can do at 16, if you're lucky, jobs for kids are increasingly scarce) but it is rather naive to think they won't get any more expensive - they almost definitely will cost yOu more as they get older.

[OddBoots]

To be fair it sounds like you already give your children far more expensive hobbies and activities than most families can afford (and I'm not knocking you for that). The essentials get more as they get older so for an average family where the essentials take up a bigger proportion of their budget then the costs will increase.

[BigStyleee]

Paying for their travel when you stop driving them about - driving lessons, car insurance, car, halls when at uni (about £450 a month and that's before uni fees), food and travel when they're at uni and you'll still be buying their clothes and shoes.
Of course they'll need their own mobiles/laptops as standard these days!

Start saving now!! It'll hit you around age 16

[vj32]

Food, clothing especially if they are big for their age so into adult clothes and shoes early. Electricity for their gadgets.

[Sparklingbrook]

When DS1 (14) has his mates round they eat and eat. i often have to go out for more supplies.

[JeanSeberg]

The most expensive years for me were pre-school - 3 in childminder at once, after that it's all relative lol.

So yes if you're looking at it from the point of view of having to pay for childcare, it will get a lot cheaper once you no longer need either full-time childcare, before/after school care or holiday clubs. So secondary school age onwards you will notice a big difference.

[JeanSeberg]

Sparkling I've got 3 teenagers - it's hard to tell where one meal ends and the next one starts isn't it.

[KatharineHepburnsTrousers]

Yes to school bus. I had forgotten, that was 15 quid a week. School lunches money as well. Even if you make packed lunches that costs. If you have a sporty child especially it's incomprehensible how much food they go through.

Pocket money, I used to give dd the child benefit until that was stopped, but carried on giving her that as allowance, so that was 80 a month. I still give her money for petrol and ad hoc money and that will probably continue until she is out ofnFT education and working FT.

[cory]

Most of the things you mention are things you could choose not to pay for if money suddenly became tight.

The things you have little choice over are:

food- a growing 15yo boy needs to eat considerably more than his 50-yo father

clothes- often cost more for an adult sized teenager, not least shoes

Somewhere between choice and necessity are things like:

compulsory field trips for A-levels and similar

computers/laptops for homeword

adult prices on many types of travel/family activities

more expenses for school books and other types of material

[JeanSeberg]

When they turn into teenagers you may as well give them your debit card and ask them for pocket money

Ha ha, I like that Katharine. You could also suggest that your salary gets paid directly into their bank accounts to cut out the middle man!

[shhhw]

Wow that was fast - thank you for lots of responses! Sparklingbrook - good list - but again, I'd say that I already spend quite a lot on most of those (live in a village and have 2 DDs with busy social lives / lots of activities and I have no restraint when it comes to the Boden catalogue), so would be v interested to know (a) if your DCs did less when they were younger, and (b) what sort of difference (quantified any way you want!) you found between, say, age 8 and age 14. Def no chance mine will be going on any £1000+ school trips unless I win the lottery. School uniform again I am already dealing with (and there is a great 2nd hand shop at school where I get most of it in practically mint condition - so does everyone else - so def no chance of bullying. So it's basically more food, and more expensive clothes, and a phone if I decide that I pay for that (rather than making them pay for it themselves if they want that)?

Trying to work out if I can afford another baby!

[KatharineHepburnsTrousers]

And if you have an open house where all their friends are welcome whenever (as I do, which I prefer) - well it's like something biblical after they have been in the kitchen to make 'toast'

Lidl is your friend.

Dd going to university will be like having her in FT childcare again financially, I reckon.

[Sparklingbrook]

Too true Jean I dug the sandwich toaster out and DS1 has a pre dinner snack of 2 toasties. Then half an hour after dinner he's rooting in the fridge again. He's skinny as a rake too.