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to think it's odd that a child without SN...

(91 Posts)
CheerfulYank Tue 21-Jan-14 01:31:43

who is 3 years and 4 months old, still sleeps in a crib and eats in high chair?

goldenlula Wed 22-Jan-14 13:14:02

I don't see the issue tbh. Ds' were 2.4 and 2.7 when they went into a bed, vacating the cot in preparation for the next baby. Dd is our last, she is 2.8 and still in a cot, she has never attempted to climb out and I am sure she will be out of the cot by the time she is 18 wink but if it isn't broke, why fix it? In all seriousness, we will be putting her in a bed at some point in the not too distant future, but we need to get bunk beds for the boys then use ds2's bed for dd.

NynaevesSister Wed 22-Jan-14 11:59:18

The taking them to the car in the buggy seems odd but might seem perfectly normal if you are involved in day to day lives. If the child pitched a fit and insisted on it then I would go along and work on weaning them off using the buggy as a crutch. I had to carry a baby boy doll to school for most of son's Reception year and it was bloody embarrassing. However having the doll helped him feel brave enough to go to school without having a meltdown. Now when he needs a crutch to help him with school he gets me to bring his light sabre, thank goodness.

gimcrack Wed 22-Jan-14 06:34:08

Sometimes people get stuck in a rut. If it's what they've always done then they keep on doing it. I know a two and a half year old whose mum complains he drinks formula and has a bottle. I wonder why she doesn't just stop giving it to him. He's still in a highchair, too.

Idocrazythings Wed 22-Jan-14 02:48:31

We use our high chair as an extra stool at the breakfast bar (no tray though) and DS (3.9) and dd (5.9) both sit in it (not at the same time... They fit fine it's a biggish fisher price one). DS also fits fine in his converted cot/toddler bed and it gives him a lot of space on the floor to make his train tracks. She probably is just in the habit and hasn't realised how big dd is? Maybe the high chair is convenient for them too?

Bogeyface Wed 22-Jan-14 02:05:20

The size thing I totally get. My friend had a 2 year old that was weeny compared to my then 5+6 year olds. Then I had DC6 and she seemed massive! She was still in sleep suits and a buggy and I was thinking "but she is HUGE!" She wasnt, I had just forgotten how tiny newborns are!

HeartShapedBox Wed 22-Jan-14 01:28:09

Welshmaenad- yes, it's definitely a bit hmm

CheerfulYank Wed 22-Jan-14 00:56:32

She doesn't sleepwalk; she's never slept in a bed so they wouldn't know if she did.

DifferentName I started the thread, again, because I truly wanted to know if I was BU. And was bored. smile I would never mention it to anyone in RL so thought I'd ask here. I have never seen a child that old still in a crib or high chair (though have known some kids with SN who were/are) and was curious. I am in no way equating it with abuse or neglect or her being "bedded down in a cardboard box". She is a very loved little girl! Now I know it's a common thing and I won't think more of it.

Nor do I think children who don't have siblings are babied. Again, I mentioned it only because I know when my DD was born, DS was nearly 6 and suddenly seemed huge! So I only meant that when the girl in question becomes a big sister in the fall, she will seem much bigger.

bochead Wed 22-Jan-14 00:43:31

Highchair - what's the dining room furniture like?

Crib - does the child thrash around a lot at night or sleepwalk?

WelshMaenad Wed 22-Jan-14 00:27:26

Heartshapedbox, that is beyond bizarre. My DS is also 3y9m, exactly, and he's been in full time school since September and goes hiking with his dad.

A buggy to the car and back?? WTAF?

BeaWheesht Wed 22-Jan-14 00:09:56


Oh and re highchair I wouldn't think it that odd tbf

BeaWheesht Wed 22-Jan-14 00:07:46

Dd is 3y4m and in a cot, she's slept in beds when on holiday / at people's houses etc its just that her ro has no space for a full bed until we get rid of the large wardrobe. That will be happening very soon though.

She hasn't been in a highchair since she was about 18 months and I think ds was about the same. Neither went in a buggy after that either unless it was several miles.

differentnameforthis Wed 22-Jan-14 00:01:50

I don't think it is a only child 'thing' or an undiagnosed SN 'thing'. I think it it just easier for the family. If they are all happy & the kid is fine & well looked after, fed, washed etc. why does it matter where she sleeps/eats? Not like they are bedding her down in a cardboard box, is it?

If it were my friend, I would see them doing what is best for their family, at that time in their lives. On the grand scheme of things, is it really worth starting a thread about what appears to be quite normal behaviour?

Ledkr Tue 21-Jan-14 23:59:38

Dd is nearly 3 and sleeps in a cot still.
She didn't sleep at all until she's was 2 and a half so I'm certainly not rocking the boat now.
The high hair is still in the kitchen but mainly because I have my nephew and also friends over with toddlers so its handy .

Dollydishus Tue 21-Jan-14 23:50:29

I've got three DCs but the 'only' thing makes me crosss too. My very closest friend has what looks like an 'only' but in fact I they lost another child soon after he was born. So the 'only' label is doubly wrong and hurtful. Their living son is a bit quirky and this was often put down to him being an 'only'. Hardly anyone knew it was actually down to them all being very bereaved. They are a very private family and years later not many people know about the child who died.

'Only' used in a pejorative way is very hurtful.

MoominsYonisAreScary Tue 21-Jan-14 23:39:47

We moved ds3 out of the cot at 2.6, although he would have quite happily stayed in it. Hes 3 in march and likes to eat his dinner in his little brothers low chair still

foreverondiet Tue 21-Jan-14 23:13:43

Don't think odd to be in a cot (American crib) at that age if child is happy with that. I only moved my son at age 3 but he would have been happy in it for longer.

Re: highchair perhaps a little more odd but again if the child wants to sit in it no harm.

CheerfulYank Tue 21-Jan-14 23:11:26

Uh, no, I didn't mention it in each post at all. confused

The only reason I mentioned it at all is in terms of them thinking she's younger than she is (which I put down to neither of them being around children at all before they had her) and that when they have another, the tininess of the baby next to their 4 year old will make them realize she isn't a baby. It was not a dig at only children, DS was an only for 6 years and for quite some time I thought he always would be!

Cory no I don't think there are undiagnosed SN. I've worked with lots of kids with SN and though the little girl seems a bit "young" for her age it's nothing I would call a developmental delay or place on the autistic spectrum or anything like that.

It is a non issue and I didn't mean to imply that it wasn't. As I said, I just always have a knee jerk "hmm that's a bit odd" feeling when I see a picture of her in a highchair or when my friend talks about the crib, and just wanted to know if it was odd or my reaction was! smile

Hulababy Tue 21-Jan-14 20:31:46

Yes - another one getting a bit tired of the "only" thing - OP mentions it in each post after all.

FWIW my DD is an only but was still in a cot bed by 18 months....Had nothing to do with her being an only or not though and entirely down to her as an individual child with her own individual needs/requirements. Her high chahir however we had until last year - she was 11y. Tripp Trapp chair - It never did have a tray - just pushed up to the table. I could sit in it; was big enough for an adult.

HeartShapedBox Tue 21-Jan-14 20:19:44

Belacoros - I have no idea.
I've seen him playing in the garden once or twice, but any time I meet them out and about he's always in the pram. I feel a bit sad for him really.

HeartShapedBox Tue 21-Jan-14 20:16:35

I wasn't having a go at "onlys" it just seemed likely to me to be a factor as kids with no siblings would have the option to sleep in a cot, for instance, much longer than a child who's got to be evicted for the next baby grin

could say the same for the last born child, they've got that bit longer than their sibling/s got (providing they have a small age gap)

LumpySpacePrincessOhMyGlob Tue 21-Jan-14 17:34:15

For what it's worth dd was in a toddler bed at 18 months and barely used the buggy past 2. [v.v.v.grumpy face]

LumpySpacePrincessOhMyGlob Tue 21-Jan-14 17:32:15

Thank you Nynaevesister for posting exactly what I was thinking. It's bloody depressing isn't it. The whole oooooooo are they an...only...hmm

Your kid can be 99 % perfect but one bad day and it must be because their an only.

Dd was almost a ginger only, she'd have been completely fucked then.

NewtRipley Tue 21-Jan-14 17:23:19

I's say it's unusual

Are you worried about this child?

Periwonkle Tue 21-Jan-14 17:18:32

I am in a v bad mood, admittedly, but the comment about "only" children being babies more?! So very smug.

SoftSheen Tue 21-Jan-14 13:50:23

Nothing to do with being an only child. My DD is (so far) an only, but had stopped using her cot, highchair and sippy cup by 2. At 2.10 we do still use the buggy a bit because I often walk quite long distances, but we don't use it for shorter journeys.

However all children are different. For instance, a very petite toddler may struggle to reach the table sitting on an ordinary dining chair, and a toddler who was inclined to get out of bed and wander around at night might be safer in a cot.

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