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My ex refuses to wash the DC school uniform

(60 Posts)
Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:39:11

I know I am not BU I need to vent.

Initially friendly separation turned into highly acrimonious divorce once ex had met new "lady".

He point blank refuses to wash the kids uniforms when he has them (6 items of clothing) he's sent it back unwashed saying they have already done their white wash/washing/it's too many clothes/washing machine broken. Although they wash her DDS uniform hmm and send mine (16 and 14 now) back with filthy clothes (he also tells them they have to shower here before they get into his car because they "smell" they still choose to go hmm).

Over the years I have not bothered to push it, but this weekend I was away for the entire weekend and unable to wash their uniforms. DS1 etched his dad Thurs and asked if they could please use their washing machine this weekend to wash their own uniforms. No was the reply we have had this argument before.


Kids had to wash them here quickly and hang them out before he picked them up and he had a go at then for keeping him waiting.

When do they realise what a prick he is and not go?

WitchWay Sun 12-Jan-14 21:41:19

Soon I expect

GailTheGoldfish Sun 12-Jan-14 21:42:42

Soon, probably! Do you think he is trying to put them off seeing him? I can't think why any loving parent wouldn't do something so simple as a bit of washing.

AuntieStella Sun 12-Jan-14 21:43:07

They probably already have.

But they might not talk about it.

Quoteunquote Sun 12-Jan-14 21:43:18

If the are 16 and 14 they should be washing their own clothes,

So when they are staying with either parent, they can just ask if it is convenient to put a wash on, and if anyone has anything they would like to add to it.

What's he going to say? No son/daughter you can't wash, if he does try that , more fool him.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:44:34

He is in what I think is quite an emotionally abusive relationship.

She has tried to exert control over me but realised she can't so he now refuses to communicate with me at all.

kinkyfuckery Sun 12-Jan-14 21:45:38

Erm, Quote, they did ask, and he did say no?

Have they only got one set of uniform?

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Sun 12-Jan-14 21:46:35

YABU to expect parents to launder clothes for 14 year olds. Teenagers do their own laundry don't they?

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:48:25

Yes he said no.

Yes they changed the school system this year do changed the uniform DC 3 went up to secondary too so spent over £400 on uniform so was unable to buy spare jumpers (that's the main thing that needs washing really as have spare everything else but they can't go in the dryer.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:49:04

They aren't allowed to use the washing machine at his house.

BillyBanter Sun 12-Jan-14 21:49:08

Can people not read the thread? It's not like it's even long.

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow Sun 12-Jan-14 21:49:26

Sorry I just saw that they asked to use the washing machine and he said no. he's a prick

IAmNotAMindReader Sun 12-Jan-14 21:51:18

In the OP it is stated that the children washed their own clothes at their mothers and have in the past asked to use their fathers washing machine and have been refused so I don't know why people are getting on their high horses about that point.

It seems to be an attempt at control yet again so don't even respond to it just tell them to sling their stuff on to wash before they go and wash their other clothes as soon as they get back. I'm sure he'll move on to something else soon enough.

5HundredUsernamesLater Sun 12-Jan-14 21:52:15

Do 14 yr olds seriously do their own laundry?

BillyBanter Sun 12-Jan-14 21:52:33

Someone had the exact same problem a few months ago, or was that you?

Thing is he's not going to change so you need to find a work around. Would it be the end of the world to do it on a weekday evening or can you not get things dry quickly enough?

ilovepowerhoop Sun 12-Jan-14 21:52:49

does nobody read the thread? They asked to use the washing machine and he said No. I dont know why they would bother to go either.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:55:01

Thing is the jumpers don't dry overnight and they are wool.

The are 20 odd quid and DS1 is in yr 11 so don't really want to be forking out.

It's sooooo petty it does my head in.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:55:54

I am thinking about giving them cash to go to the launderette down the road from his hmm.

Finola1step Sun 12-Jan-14 21:56:25

Blimey. Poor kids. Being stuck in the middle of nonsense over washing school uniforms.

I think it won't be long before they get very fed up with this sort of rubbish.

MrsCakesPremonition Sun 12-Jan-14 21:57:30

They have to shower before going to his house because he thinks they smell? That is even more peculiar than the whole washing machine thing IMO.

Finola1step Sun 12-Jan-14 21:58:12

X post. By the time you are paying out for the laundarette, you might as well get each an extra jumper.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 21:58:30

I know hmm

Finola1step Sun 12-Jan-14 21:59:35

Agree about the shower insistence. Is that actually so that the children use less water at the exh's? The swine.

Gossipmonster Sun 12-Jan-14 22:00:47

I think so - I reckon he's got a water meter - he was always a tight c**t hmm

pigletmania Sun 12-Jan-14 22:02:46

What a jerk, I hope they realise soon! Who Denys their child washing facilities, and using the shower.

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