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to not be overly sympathetic to grieving friend

(436 Posts)
znaika Sun 12-Jan-14 21:34:04

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DoItTooJulia Sun 12-Jan-14 21:36:06

Yep. It is cuntish.

Grief is a funny old thing.

Try and be kind?

SuckItAndSee Sun 12-Jan-14 21:36:12

when someone dies it's always too soon
all that "good innings" business is really insensitive.

Morgause Sun 12-Jan-14 21:36:19

It's always tragic to lose someone you love and who loved you. So I think YABU.

needaholidaynow Sun 12-Jan-14 21:36:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsS28 Sun 12-Jan-14 21:37:42

Death is unfortunately a fact of life. You seem reasonable to me.

A month of work seems unreasonable to me.

MisForMumNotMaid Sun 12-Jan-14 21:37:46

Are you sure you know the real story. Grief for a Grandmother could be a semi plausible cover for something that she doesn't wish to be public knowledge.

Twighlightsparkle Sun 12-Jan-14 21:37:50

A months compassionate leave is odd, apart from that yes YABU

kinkyfuckery Sun 12-Jan-14 21:37:55


MisForMumNotMaid Sun 12-Jan-14 21:38:28


jacks365 Sun 12-Jan-14 21:38:30

I take it you've never lost anyone you are close to.


CoffeeTea103 Sun 12-Jan-14 21:39:04

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IAmNotAMindReader Sun 12-Jan-14 21:39:23

Is it more you feel she is not genuinely still distraught but perhaps milking the situation for the attention its bringing her?

Xoticdreamz Sun 12-Jan-14 21:40:23

Some people are better at accepting death and dealing with grief than others YABU

Newyearchanger Sun 12-Jan-14 21:40:32

Can't imagine it myself but then I have never been close to grandparents.

Age when they die makes no difference, it's how much that person meant to you and how much you loved them and miss them.

Sirzy Sun 12-Jan-14 21:40:37

YABU. The year my grandmother died was horrible, you don't need to have been raised by someone to be close to them

Joules68 Sun 12-Jan-14 21:40:42

Grief comes out in different ways and this may in fact be grief over her grandmother AND someone else from way back


Not everyone is like you

Newyearchanger Sun 12-Jan-14 21:41:31

Even if your parent is very old, you still feel devastated so ycbbu

MuttonCadet Sun 12-Jan-14 21:41:31

YABU, and probably don't know the full story, (a months leave would be unusual for a GM).

biscuit to go with that saucer of milk, I hope your grief fits into other peoples expectations.

marceline Sun 12-Jan-14 21:42:26

I am 36. My nan is 83. She has been in hospital for a month having had surgery to remove secondary skin cancer from her lymph nodes. I know her chances aren't great and I'm trying to work my head around that thought. But I know that I will never be ready to let her go and the thought of that future grief is almost too hard to bear. When - if she dies it will be sick with grief. YABU.

kilmuir Sun 12-Jan-14 21:42:48

Yanbu. Its not tragic, sad but not unexpected surely.

KatieScarlett2833 Sun 12-Jan-14 21:43:08

My granny is in her 90s and when she goes I will be devastated. She practically brought me up and I adore her.

AnnieOnAMapleLeaf Sun 12-Jan-14 21:43:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsSquirrel Sun 12-Jan-14 21:44:12

Infuriated? Seriously? YABU

If you don't have it in you to be kind, just ignore her.

znaika Sun 12-Jan-14 21:44:20

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