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To be offended?

(61 Posts)
bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 21:45:25

I was just watching millionaire matchmaker. One of the blokes took his lady up in a helicopter for their first date, I asked dp if he would take me in a helicopter for a first date. "if you looked like that" he said, pointing to the woman on screen. I felt pretty deflated to be honest, even if I was a "joke". AIBU?

Valdeeves Thu 02-Jan-14 21:46:58

I'd feel the same

LaGuardia Thu 02-Jan-14 21:48:39


TheLostPelvicFloorOfPoosh Thu 02-Jan-14 21:48:53

Blimey shock

Sell him and buy your own helicopter. What a tosser.

LuisSuarezTeeth Thu 02-Jan-14 21:50:19

What a cock.

WorraLiberty Thu 02-Jan-14 21:50:24

Why did you put the word joke in quotes?

Was it a joke or do you think he was being serious?

Unless you have issues you haven't told us about, I wouldn't have thought any more about it.

In fact I probably would have laughed and thought of a come back to shut him up grin

bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 21:51:23

Sorta, he said it was a joke, however, not my sense of humour hmm

pictish Thu 02-Jan-14 21:53:07

Must admit...I'd be pretty crushed after that comment as well.

Madambossyboots Thu 02-Jan-14 21:53:46

What a stupid thing to say.... Him, not you.

olibeansmummy Thu 02-Jan-14 21:54:08

Oh I'd be furious!

WorraLiberty Thu 02-Jan-14 21:54:34

Ahh gotcha

It's a difficult thing for anyone here to really answer though

I know couples who joke like this all the time...always playfully insulting each other and there's no malice at all.

I also know couples who are not like that at all.

I guess your DH should know whether you'd find it funny or not though.

bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 21:54:45

Thanks for validating I'm not being over sensitive

horseface2 Thu 02-Jan-14 21:56:17

Helicopter rides aren't cheap though are they, maybe he was offended at the idea that he should spend a load of money on you on a first date to impress you smile

RandyRudolf Thu 02-Jan-14 21:56:35

Tell him the day you finally meet a bloke with a big chopper you'll be outta there!

fortyplus Thu 02-Jan-14 21:57:13

Hang on a mo... his comment was insensitive but surely by asking him the 'funny' question in the first place when presumably you know he couldn't afford a first date like that you were expecting an amusing reply. So his response wasn't to your taste but yabu - you went fishing and caught a boot instead of a salmon.

bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 21:57:33


formerbabe Thu 02-Jan-14 21:58:14

I wouldn't be best pleased.

bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 21:58:43

He could afford it though. He was going to take me in a helicopter a while back when he got the opportunity for a ride....

HyvaPaiva Thu 02-Jan-14 21:58:59

he said it was a joke, however, not my sense of humour

And therein lies the offensiveness. It's only joking or 'banter' as long as it's also funny to the listener/'recipient'. If it's not their sense of humour, then it's just nastiness dressed up.

YANBU and what he said was just horrible.

bordellosboheme Thu 02-Jan-14 22:00:53

Hyva, I told him my feelings were hurt and he kind of acted like that was my problem..... And he didn't mean anything by it. However, the comment felt like I didn't matter to him cos I don't look like the woman in the programme....

SPsWantsCliffInHerStocking Thu 02-Jan-14 22:01:34

Id have laughed and been insulting back.

But if you are offended then that's ok. No else can tell you whether you should be offended or not

usernameunknown Thu 02-Jan-14 22:07:33

I'd have done the same as SPs and taken the piss back. We're always taking the piss out of each other though so it's the nature of our relationship

If it's out of character or he knows you'd be offended by it then YANBU

i might be a bit but i occasionally make similar jokes to dp so i'm a massive hypocrite

Upcycled Thu 02-Jan-14 22:13:42

I would have laughed as this is my kind of jokes tbh.

Upcycled Thu 02-Jan-14 22:16:18

And I bloody love this ridiculous programme, it is one of my many shit programmes guilty pleasure and I wish I had company to watch it with me but DH likes bloke's programmes like Top Gear or Storage Hunters. When and where is it on? My skybox is not recording it anymore.
Is there new seasons? I think I watched it all.

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