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to think my dB's ex is a total bitch????

(187 Posts)
ginmakesitallok Wed 25-Dec-13 23:07:29

dB and his ex been split up for about 2 years, she was abusive. She always been very awkward about letting him see his D's, and although we've advised him to take her to court to get access formally sorted out he hasn't. So, today, Christmas day and the bitch wouldn't let him see his son. Happy for him to play Santa, but not willing to let him see his son at all. Am so oooo stopping myself phoning her and telling her what I think of her. It's killing him. How can anyone be so cruel????

Lweji Tue 31-Dec-13 17:13:28

The court system always takes time, but the dad got the result he wanted.

There will also be a few mums in somewhat similar circumstances. Sometimes we hear about them here. There are cases where children are being abused by their fathers and the court still enforces contact, and the mother is afraid of breaching contact. The world is not perfect. It does not mean that we should avoid the courts, or that they never work.

Evidence is about numbers, just not a case in a newspaper.

It still stands that if the informal path is not working, then the OP's brother should go the legal route.

Lweji Tue 31-Dec-13 17:14:42

I have to ask what the fuck was the judge on and is he still in the family court system?
Well, quite.
It is a shame that some judges don't seem fit to be in that position.

BoneyBackJefferson Tue 31-Dec-13 17:43:59

It is a shame that some judges don't seem fit to be in that position.

I think that should be aimed at all of the various "specialist" organisations that get involved with these cases.

BillyBanter Tue 31-Dec-13 17:51:41

Same for anything. There should be some sort of audit of judges' performances. How many complaints, how many cases overturned etc. Maybe there is...

So essentially, both men and women can be abusive partners, yes. I don't agree that fathers get sidelined in order to accommodate mothers, I think Courts and Cafcass are very keen for parents to have equal care. I maintain that it's ridiculous to be too willing to believe any stranger who is so emotionally involved in something like this and as I said, understandably biased. I don't believe that happily agreeing 'what a bitch, he should go for full custody' comments are sensible and besides, if his child is happy with his mother then he shouldn't want to go for full so-called 'custody'. Sounds like something needs to be formalised for a bit of stability though.

fifi669 Tue 31-Dec-13 19:39:37

I think go to court, get contact formalised. If she goes against it, go for custody.

Lweji Tue 31-Dec-13 19:47:01

Fully agree with fifi669's last post. Exactly.

BoneyBackJefferson Tue 31-Dec-13 20:09:24

agree with the last four posts. smile

fifi669 Tue 31-Dec-13 21:29:49

Bloody hell. Is a thread in agreement??? shock smile

Rufustherednosedreindeer Tue 31-Dec-13 22:08:55

Think it's ended up that way


Lweji Tue 31-Dec-13 22:12:53


I think we were sort of saying the same thing.

But I'm sure someone will come eventually and disagree. grin

BoneyBackJefferson Tue 31-Dec-13 22:47:51


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