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To be a bit sad that friends are replacing their Christmas cards with charity donations?

(32 Posts)
BigBirthdayGloom Tue 24-Dec-13 23:09:25

I'm glad the charity gets the money, obviously. But increasingly, cards to individuals with a couple of catch up lines or even more, have been replaced by an e-card to everyone. I miss the personal touch. Even a couple of lines of an email would be lovely.

differentnameforthis Thu 26-Dec-13 02:09:15

It costs me $3 to send a card to the UK at Christmas. I have family /friends in the UK, so am looking at, at least 20 cards.

Sending an email/ecard = $0.

My family are happy for me to send emails etc, because they know how much it costs.

Mellowandfruitful Thu 26-Dec-13 00:42:04

Call me cynical, but I wonder how many of the people who say they are donating to charity instead actually do, as opposed to using it as an excuse not to do cards? (Company on this thread excepted, of course...)

I still like doing cards, and buy charity ones so it comes out the same, plus I recycle them with the Woodland Trust so trees get planted as a result. Agree with whoever said the price of postage is the most offputting factor - it is for me.

ravenAK Thu 26-Dec-13 00:37:03

I struggle a bit to understand the objection to a quick post on FB, tbh.

I assume that anyone on my FB friend list vvho normally expects a card from us vvill see my post & think 'Fair enough' (or possibly be miffed, but hey ho) & anyone vvho doesn't vvill ignore, just like I've been ignoring pictures of people's grandads in vvonky paper crovvns all day - if it's not of interest you just scroll past it, surely?

I don't think it's sanctimonious to share a link to a charity - my FB feed is frequently full of people doing just that because they're doing a fundraising event, donating, or just making people avvare of the existence of a cause they think merits support.

Unless people are posting in the hopes of pats on the head, vvhich seems unlikely vvhen you're basically saying 'I vvas going to spend £20 on stamps but I've given it to the cats' home' - you haven't made any extra effort, in fact you've saved yourself a job!

ashtrayheart Thu 26-Dec-13 00:20:25

I don't do cards apart from to immediate family - but I don't make a donation to charity either! (I don't mean ever, just not instead of buying cards).

Mrswellyboot Thu 26-Dec-13 00:13:11

I just hate FB shite silly posts, though I don't mind them saying they are donating to charity of it means more people do.

I like real cards, real contact. I would prefer a telephone call or visit than a virtual happy Christmas.

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 26-Dec-13 00:09:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 26-Dec-13 00:08:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ravenAK Wed 25-Dec-13 23:56:36

I sacked off the cards this year (yep, FB announcement - my money vvent to a charity a mate has just set up & I vvanted to help promote it - besides, many of the people vve'd normally send a card to are on FB so it lets them knovv they haven't dropped off our list -I get paranoid about stuff like that so I assume others might).

It felt like one less PITA job & I'd be quite happy never to see another Xmas card, myself - except for my 12th Night ritual of cutting them into gift tags for next year, I'll admit I'd miss that! A bit.

Hovvever, I might re-instate the ones for older relatives next year - & then just let it tail off naturally over the years...probably the easiest middle ground.

VVhat irritated me most vvas telling dh I'd decided to donate to friend's charity this year, & seeing him do a double take: 'But vvhat about my stepmother, & Auntie Gladys, & my mum's next door neighbours?!'

I explained that he vvas absolutely vvelcome to do cards for them, & handed him a box of cards & a book of stamps.

They did not receive cards.

Travelledtheworld Wed 25-Dec-13 23:42:38

I also continue to send cards to older and distant friends and relatives, together with a letter and a few handwritten lines too.
I enjoy going through my address book and remembering people.

Rhubarbgarden Wed 25-Dec-13 23:31:18

Yanbu. Every year the Christmas cards on the walls get fewer and it makes me feel sad. I have many memories of helping my Mum hang up cards when I was a kid, sorting them out into size order, making the big list afterwards of who had sent them and then cutting them up to make tags for the next year. All part of family Christmas tradition. Silly and a waste of time, trees and money I'm quite sure, but so is a lot of Christmas. People spend so much on presents these days compared to when I was a kid, and light up their houses with more outside lights than a landing strip, it seems odd to me to penny pinch on the Christmas cards.

ChristmasJumperWearer Wed 25-Dec-13 23:00:25

I agree with the charity/eco sentiments BUT love sending and receiving cards.

Also young DCs and older folks alike (who may not use FB) enjoy them, so why not? I make a particular effort to send them to neighbours and older friends/family who we don't keep in touch with via FB or email, and try to include a personal message and a photo of the DCs.

Each to their own.

Lilacroses Wed 25-Dec-13 22:52:12

How odd. I would never think that sort pf statement was smug. The point of announcing it is surely to let people know why they're not receiving a card. I think it's a good idea for people you see all the time anyway. A bit different for those that live far away.

Theonlyoneiknow Wed 25-Dec-13 22:50:29

This, said up thread
"The point of sharing on Facebook isn't boasting, it's sharing the idea and the charity you want to support in the hope others might also think it worthwhile"

I use to love sending cards and writing a note inside but I can't bear to pay the price of stamps so I give cards I can deliver in person, and make a donation to charity instead of buying stamps. Last year we donated to the local SANDS charity, and this year to the Lullaby Trust (former SIDS charity). Both small, not especially well known charities that I wanted to donate to (irrespective of using my Christmas card money, it just means I can give a little more). So by saying on FB what I am doing it is hopefully letting more people know about their work.

I also send a personal email as well as saying the above on FB.

looselegs Wed 25-Dec-13 22:39:01

I think maybe some of the problem is the cost of postage.I bought a lovely card for my Aunt and Uncle and the postage was nearly as much as the card! So if you have 20 ordinary sized cards to post, it can cost over a tenner to post them!
a friend of mine takes in guide dogs and trains them. This year she has decided to donate the card and postage money to the Guide dogs and i can't say I blame her. I posted a card 1st class 2 weeks ago and the recipients never got it.

Highlander Wed 25-Dec-13 17:32:40

No hoppinghare, if you have friends on Facebook, it's a great way to inform people that you're not sending cards. In the days before phones and social media, cards were pretty much the only option of wishing yiur frends a happy Crimbo. Social media can replace cards for some people, although it's till pretty rare.

It's not sanctimonius to suggest a charity donation, it's a lovely thought at Christmas, and no more sanctimonius than buying charidee cards.

Crinkle77 Wed 25-Dec-13 15:24:48

Doesn't bother me. I hate writing xmas cards and actually I haven't sent any this year except for close family.

hoppinghare Wed 25-Dec-13 01:12:40

I think it is rude to say on facebook that you are giving to charity instead of sending christmas cards. Whether or not a person gives to charity at christmas is nobody else's business and has nothing to do with whether or not you send christmas cards. If you can't be arsed sending them, that's fine. If you don't like the idea of them, that's fine. But sanctimonious announcements telling people you have given to charity on facebook are just annoying and have nothing to do with christmas cards.

BackforGood Wed 25-Dec-13 01:10:47

I do like receiving and sending Christmas cards from / to people I don't see often, but like to keep in touch with. Am very glad that most places where I see people often now do a 'One card to everyone and we'll have a collection for X charity' instead of individual cards nowadays though.

Sixgeese Wed 25-Dec-13 00:54:23

YANBU one of my friends announced a few week ago that thought it was a good idea if we all gave to a particular charity (one she supports) instead of sending cards, I think she had forgotten that a couple of weeks prior she showed me the 100+ cards that her husband had ordered off the Internet. They weren't cheap cards either. At least now I know that she likes over 100 people more than me (we have been friends for years, our husbands have worked together for nearly 20 years and both her DC were ushers at our wedding so I has thought that we might be one of the favoured few).

AnythingNotEverything Wed 25-Dec-13 00:46:13

I love Christmas cards. I know it's a waste of paper and it's expensive, but I love them.

I've already bought most of next year's. I won't be stopping anytime soon.

HarpyFishwifeTwat Wed 25-Dec-13 00:38:11

YANBU at all. I'm getting increasingly fed up of the smug messages - "we're not sending cards, we're giving money to charity". Christmas cards are one of the few personal messages left between friends and family, the one time in the year when we say to people that we're still thinking of them and now it's almost expected to lose all personal contact. As long as there's a supercilious message on Facebook then that's ok. Pah.

TheMaw Wed 25-Dec-13 00:33:47

YANBU, I love sending Xmas cards and I love getting them. I think part of the decline in sending them is due to the insane postage costs.

BigBirthdayGloom Wed 25-Dec-13 00:16:35

See, I'd love to save trees by sending brief "merry Christmas"" emails with a personal bit relevant to the person I'm sending it to. But I guess if all you do is write to x love from y it really doesn't matter. Might think about it next year.

Glitterfeet Tue 24-Dec-13 23:35:22

It's great awareness for a charity if people post on FB about it.

Fluffyears Tue 24-Dec-13 23:31:55

I tell people via Facebook so people know I'm not being rude not sending a card. I too am supporting a hospice where my DP's father was looked after at the end of his life.

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