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To think that a vast proportion of umsnetters are not having the Christmas they would like?

(90 Posts)
Sparklingbrook Tue 24-Dec-13 21:19:46

They are either-

Going to other peoples' houses that they don't want to go to, and eat food they don't want to eat with people they don't want to speak to.


Having people round that they don't want round, who tell them what they want to eat (and when) and they don't want to speak to.

confused grin

LadyAlysVorpatril Tue 24-Dec-13 21:33:45

Well... it was going great till we started getting the d and v bug at the weekend,3 of us have now had it and we still feel like crap, and the last one seems to be just getting it right now. And I put my back out throwing up and my toddler is hysterically clingy because he's been ill and wants me to pick him up all the time. Christmas is basically cancelled bar the presents.

Good one here, just us for lunch, for the first time as a little family, and only the second time me and DH have done it alone ever fgrin

DontCallMeDaughter Tue 24-Dec-13 21:35:20

Oh yeah! Sounds like my last 10 Christmases... Toxic family syndrome. This year it's just me, dh and dd. Eating what we want when we want with a couple of visitors in the afternoon! Bliss!!!

BrownSauceSandwich Tue 24-Dec-13 21:35:43

Exactly what londonmother said.

Onlyjoking Tue 24-Dec-13 21:36:41

I'm looking forward to Christmas,just me DP and our 4 teenager.
Thank goodness MIL is not talking to us, means we don't have to do dinner at their house.Its just us, we will eat trifle and raise a spoonful to remember my DH,the children's dad.

HermioneWeasley Tue 24-Dec-13 21:37:57

I'm having a lovely time! Exactly as I wanted it.

MammaTJ Tue 24-Dec-13 21:40:10

ILs hosting an none of them speak to him=not to bother, spend time with peoploe who actually like them!

Sparklingbrook Tue 24-Dec-13 21:56:21

YY I suppose we couldn't have a 'I am having a fab Christmas doing what I want with people I really like' thread as that would be a bit boasty to the folk having a horrible time.

magicberry Tue 24-Dec-13 22:07:50

Most people having a great Christmas don't feel the need to come online and complain I guess, or to come online and boast (and certainly not on MN where they would immediately get a flaming for being smug…)

SugarHut Tue 24-Dec-13 22:15:04

I'm having the perfect Christmas. Except for the first time since having DS I'm single. As per usual everyone is coming to mine, I've got amazing homemade food, lots of games, filled to the brim with gorgeous presents. And having to put a big false smile on, as I sit there feeling like the only loser in the entire family who is partnerless over Christmas. Not so bad tomorrow, but at mother's on Friday? With about 30 of us? Many of whom it will be the first time they've seen me since becoming "just me." And every other one of them is sitting there all lovey dovey with their husbands/wives? That, is going to be the day from hell. I can see the pitying looks now.

FudgefaceMcZ Tue 24-Dec-13 22:25:08

My Christmas would be great if I'd not trapped my fingers in the door earlier with the fecking gale force winds and now having to try and wrap presents with a swollen hand, and trying to stop myself opening the big chocolate tin that I insisted to the kids was not to be opened until tomorrow as a way of handling the pain. I suppose it might be better if I had a mother in law to blame for the door-slamming event but alas none such available.

Inthequietcoach Tue 24-Dec-13 22:28:24

My Christmas Eve would be perfect if I did not now have to move off the sofa and do the dishes.

Forgot to put the reindeer glitter out though, and dc are asleep, so need to brave the storm and do that in case Santa does not come.

Sugar, there may be some pitying looks, but there will be others who, in their hearts, envy you. Last Christmas I was partnered and miserable. Strength to you, those who care will see you, not your marital status.

WilsonFrickett Tue 24-Dec-13 22:32:06

Just us and DS got his over-excitement tantrum out of the way tonight so I am full of bliss. I think if you're happy with your plans you don't tend to post about it?

dancingwithmyselfandthecat Tue 24-Dec-13 22:34:27

depressing post alert

I had a stillbirth last year, following three miscarriages. So I can't have the Christmas I want, because my baby, who I should be organising Christmas around, making everyone eat at noon or keep quiet while they nap, isn't here.

That aside, my Christmas sounds depressing to outsiders. I have sent DH up to his mum so that we can go away together for new year. I am by myself in the morning, and then spending the afternoon with my parents, siblings and DNs before going back home to a house empty except for the cat.

But I think its fucking bliss. I've just got back from a friends dinner party, I'm drinking cava in front of an old film and I get a glorious lie in tomorrow morning. When I get home tomorrow night, I will run a big bath and call DH while I finish off the bottle I started tonight.

It might be a hard day in parts but after the year I've had ( I threw myself into work and set up my own business) I am fucking grateful for loved ones, alcohol and a good rest.

WilsonFrickett Tue 24-Dec-13 22:34:39

((Fudge)) that sounds really sore sad alternate paracetamol and ibruprofen. and wine

I am having the Christmas I want except for the fact my son has D&V.

We are hoping he'll be better in the morning.

FanFuckingTastic Tue 24-Dec-13 23:00:22

Christmas generally sucks once Santa no longer exists.

This year I don't have my children and I am with my partner who I told yesterday I would likely be leaving in the New Year. My step dad died last month and his funeral was just under two weeks ago. I had no money to buy presents so the kids only have a small stocking. My mother has been diagnosed with a shrinking cerebellum to go along with being widowed. I am about to receive a pile of well thought out generous presents and all I managed was some socks and vodka, and a break up. I feel like a horrible person, drinking hasn't helped with that any.

I think though that all the Christmases from now on will be amazing in
comparison. Life has ups and downs, and at Christmas as at any time of year, in fact I think the pressure of having an amazing Christmas makes it more stressful.

DENMAN03 Tue 24-Dec-13 23:01:19

My Christmas is turning out perfectly as I planned. I feel sorry for my poor next door neighbour who was due to travel to family today but couldn't get there due to the train cancellations. I have invited her to dinner too to make sure she is not on her own.
Family are coming round in the morning for presents and a big roast dinner with all the trimmings. I love it!

ouryve Tue 24-Dec-13 23:04:01

Just us and the boys with no social obligations. If either of them melt down (both have ASD), it will be without a huge audience. We will have the Christmas we expect. If it all becomes too much, it can just be an ordinary day with presents and extra food.

FanFuckingTastic Tue 24-Dec-13 23:12:00


Both my children are on the spectrum (HFA) and I dread Christmas with extended family as one gets completely hyperactive and the other has issues with expressing gratitude and says difficult to understand things for them. I get it as I am HFA also and he doesn't have a filter for thoughts to speech, just like me but more pronounced due to being a boy I think. It's caused so many arguments with people saying I should punish them etc, what I've decided is actually just not to over stimulate them out overwhelm them instead.

McPie Tue 24-Dec-13 23:24:00

I am sorry but I am having exactly the Christmas I want, and always have, me, dh and our three kids eating what suits us and nobody else. Boxing day will be spent at my mums with myself, my parents and 8 kids as everyone else has to work this year.

mrsjay Tue 24-Dec-13 23:27:16

I am doing what i want well i want to be in the sun and not in the cold UT i go to my mums I eat her food will come home put new Pjs on and sit and get pissed and watch recorded telly

expatinscotland Tue 24-Dec-13 23:28:21

I'll never have the Christmas I want because my daughter is dead.

ouryve Tue 24-Dec-13 23:29:47

The whole of December's been tricky, FFT. It took us over an hour to walk the 1km home from school the day the post box went up at School on Dec 2nd because DS1's engine broke down. A week ago, I had one boy ranting in one ear and the other wailing in the other, while I was trying to wrap TA gifts. That was a fun night.

I'm lucky that family is understanding, but I can imagine how family take umbrage at how ungrateful your DS might appear, on the surface.

FutTheShuckUp Tue 24-Dec-13 23:31:37

This thread is weird. Some people aren't having the Christmas they want as their family members loved ones are no longer hear or are dying. Sorry to sound blunt but this just appears insensitive

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