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To have gone to the loo?

(93 Posts)
FCEK Tue 17-Dec-13 11:41:02

At the weekend, dd and I went to the cinema to see frozen. She's 5.

Half way through I went to the loo. I thought about leaving it til the movie finished as was unsure about leaving dd in the hall, but I was desperate!!

Dd was fine, enjoying the movie and I made sure she knew to stay put. I was only 5 mins (toilet right next door to the room).

Mil and sil seem to think it was very risky (dd told them mummy missed some of the movie)

I'm annoyed. WIBU?

StealthPolarBear Tue 17-Dec-13 15:39:43

I wouldnt have but id happily ask anothernparent to keep an eye on mine. Risks of abduction - very very low. Risk of him deciding to have a wander, look for me or go to buy an ice cream - still low but not as low. In which case another parent saying "your mummy will be back in a sec" would be enough to keep him where he was till I got back.

SecretRed Tue 17-Dec-13 15:46:37

Depends on the child really. I left my dd at that age in the cinema to go to the loo and she was fine. I couldn't have left ds as I was not sure he would stay put for 5 mins if I wasn't there.

phantomnamechanger Tue 17-Dec-13 16:00:13

every 5 yo child is different, every cinema is different in size/layout/busyness, every parent is different. you made the decision you made, others disagreed - why not just shrug it off instead of coming here to see what % agree with you or not?

Runningoverthefields Tue 17-Dec-13 16:11:36

envy that you can leave your kids while you go to the loo. I bet you can drink whole cups of tea as well, can't you, before they go cold?

I see you and your sort about, drinking your cups of tea while your children do colouring-in books in cafes. A child who stays where you left them without shackles (I presume you didn't use shackles?)

If you think that I'm giving you a hard stare because I'm judging you for leaving your child, you're wrong. I'm glaring because I'm jealous. Five minutes would be all it took for my child to have created total carnage. It would have taken months to unravel the police/social services/concerned onlookers/payment for damage to property/hospital visit to reset bones etc…

curlew Tue 17-Dec-13 16:22:30


With dd if I had even suggested such a thing I would have had a howling octopus wrapped round my knees hysterically accusing me of leaving meeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

Runningoverthefields Tue 17-Dec-13 16:49:33

grin @curlew I can imagine DS doing that too - but if I'd actually left him there is no way he'd still be there when I got back. He could cover quite a bit of ground in five minutes when he was five. The boy was a bolter.

Up until DS was 5 even when at home I had to pee with the door open shouting 'BE CAREFUL' 'PUT THAT DOWN' 'TAKE THAT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH' 'TAKE YOUR FINGER OUT OF THERE' 'STOP CLIMBING UP THAT' at random intervals through the open door just hoping that I was shouting the right admonishment at the right time.

One time when he was four I peed with the door shut. Oh, the dangerous luxury. When I came out it was awfully quiet and I noticed a draught. He'd managed to turn the latch on the front door and he was legging it up a London street in a dodgy area, completely naked, barefoot and laughing his little head off. He hadn't been naked when I left him. It had been three minutes, I swear. I need more tea just thinking about it…

Justforlaughs Tue 17-Dec-13 17:04:15

I've done it - in fact, last night I left 3 of mine in the cinema while I did some Christmas Shopping. Ok, so they are a bit older now wink but I've let mine out of sight for 5 minutes more times than I can remember, and did when they were younger as well. (Youngest is 5.) If I was in a cinema and another mother left her DC for 5 minutes, and the child was not distressed, I wouldn't bat an eyelid. If the child WAS distressed I would offer comfort (like sitting next to them until Mummy comes back). If a complete stranger walked over and sat by them, causing them more distress, or tried to leave with them I would call them on it. I'm sure that 99% of the population would do the same.

Shamoy Tue 17-Dec-13 17:04:32

I've got a 5 year old and I'd totally leave him for a few minutes while u went to the toilet. I've also got an 8 year old and I'd think twice about leaving him as he's more chaotic!

Justforlaughs Tue 17-Dec-13 17:05:07

Running forget the tea, have a wine!

ironmansmum Tue 17-Dec-13 20:56:06

No, wouldn't leave them anywhere alone

MalcolmTuckersMistress Tue 17-Dec-13 21:05:07

No way would I have! The entire theatre was probably full of paedophiles. Also the cinema could have gone on fire while you were away too...what would you have done then? Not to mention you could easily have slipped on a pissy floor, knocked yourself out, fallen head first in the toilet and drowned.

I think you were completely unreasonable. Hand your child over to Social Services IMMEDIATELY!

P.s. Yanbu.

monicalewinski Tue 17-Dec-13 21:06:00

Running Actual lol'd at your errant child and your 'hard, jealous glaring'

monicalewinski Tue 17-Dec-13 21:07:25


Wise words....

ProfessorSong Tue 17-Dec-13 21:09:12

I'd have just taken her with me and made sure I was quick. My DC usually need to go at least once or twice when we go to the cinema anyway. I absolutely wouldn't leave them though. My dad was sexually assaulted in a cinema when he was 11 and sitting alone. So I'm probably more weary than most.

girliefriend Tue 17-Dec-13 21:12:19

I took my dd 7yo to see Frozen as well at wend smile I left her for 5 mins to nip to the loo and I even thought 'hmm bet mn wouldn't approve' grin

Joysmum Tue 17-Dec-13 21:15:33

It's a family film, there would have been lots of families. I'd have done it, and did do it.

WelshMaenad Tue 17-Dec-13 21:19:08

Yep, done it loads of times. Will also happily leave DS (3) with dd (7) while I go. Wouldn't leave him alone as carnage would ensue but oddly if his sister's there he'll happily sit still and quiet.

Then again I'm one of those horrendous mothers who leaves them in the car whilst I nip into bank/shop so you may want to disregard my irresponsible opinion.

rabbitlady Tue 17-Dec-13 21:21:22

wouldn't have done it. the child is too precious to me to take any really idiotic risks like leaving her unguarded in a place where weirdos will choose to be in order to find children.

LeafyGreen13 Tue 17-Dec-13 22:50:41

There is kind of an assumption here that the child will get distressed if someone strange goes and sits with them but that often isn't the case. Those pictures of that poor girl in Thailand who happily wandered off hand in hand with the guy who raped and killed her were so chilling. A stranger wouldn't know if the guy was her dad or some random weirdo. If you leave a child in the car then I assume the doors are locked so no one can get in or out. I'm not the hysterical type but I do find cinemas very creepy places.

curlew Tue 17-Dec-13 22:54:02

"to me to take any really idiotic risks like leaving her unguarded in a place where weirdos will choose to be in order to find children."

Because children are regularly stolen from cinemas while family films are being shown. Evidence of this danger, please?

JanetAndRoy Tue 17-Dec-13 23:00:18

I'd happily leave my two (5 & 8) while I went to the WC. If anyone tried to take them, it wouldn't be long before they brought them back..!

Abbierhodes Tue 17-Dec-13 23:31:01

Haha rabbitlady!!

You are joking, right??

IThoughtThat Tue 17-Dec-13 23:43:27

I would probably have done it although it would depend a bit on the child, the cinema and the rest of the clientele.

YANBU smile

MrsUptight Tue 17-Dec-13 23:47:40

I dont get why people wouldnt just take the child with them. Why take risks?

BrianTheMole Tue 17-Dec-13 23:48:38

No I wouldn't have. I went to see Frozen today with my 4 and 6 yr old. The youngest wanted the loo and I thought about leaving the oldest, but I didn't. Although had I been sitting near some parents I probably would have asked them to keep an eye, but the cinema was quite empty so there was no one sitting near us.

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