To resent signing yet another birthday card

[ginmakesitallok]

When I never get one???? I've worked here for about 12 years. There are 20 of us in our team. The admin team have a birthday book and everyone gets a card, except for me!!!! I used to, and then about 5 years ago I got one on a completely random date. I pointed out it wasn't my birthday, and told them the right date. All taken very well, no bad feelings. But since then I haven't. Had a card.


It doesn't really bother me that much, but this morning I was passed a card to sign for someone in another team, which pissed me off.

So, so I continue to silently seeth, or do I ask why I don't get a card?????

[lottiegarbanzo]

Ask!

[sonu678]

ask why you dont get a card

[rpitchfo]

I'd silently seeth but i think it's best just to nip in the admin office and have a quiet word.

[ginmakesitallok]

But won't I look really petty and childish????

[redexpat]

Ask!

[DustyBaubles]

Does your birthday fall over Christmas or another closure day/holiday?

I've noticed that people miss out on cards if they are not actually due to be at work.

[ginmakesitallok]

Nope falls in the summer. I work part time, but other people get cards early if their birthdays fall at the weekend, or if they are off on their birthday. My next one is a big one, so don't want it to l

[ginmakesitallok]

To look like I'm after a present ( which others would get)

[gamerchick]

Why don't you just say with a laugh while signing 'yanno.. I've been here 12 years and never had one of these done for me. Do I smell?' And smile. Make light of it and if you don't get one next time then you'll know the score.

[AlpacaPicnic]

The sensible thing would be to ask.

What I would actually do is a PA bringing in of a fuckton of cakes etc because 'you are only 21 once haha' insert age of choice obviously

Start practicing your daily mail sadface now...

[Topaz25]

YANBU to want to be treated equally, since your office has a policy of recognising everybody else's birthday. It's probably an oversight but it should be corrected. Just mention to the admin team that you would like to be included (or steal the birthday book and write yours in.)

[struggling100]

Ouch - that would hurt me, even if I knew it was unintentional.

Next time a card comes round, just have a word in a jokey way, kind of 'Lovely card you've found there. My [insert relative] would love it - where's it from? Oh, and why don't I ever get one of these cards? My birthday's [insert date]. I know I'm getting older now, but I'm not THAT sensitive about it [big grin]'. Hopefully they'll get the message.

[iloveny001]

Have they not updated the birthday book? Worth an ask.

[ginmakesitallok]

To look like I'm after a present ( which others would get)

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

Is it possible that they are demonstrating bureaucratic inertia?

They know they got it wrong a few years ago. Someone meant to update the birthday book but now no one can remember whether the book got updated or not. They dont want to send another card on the wrong date as that would look like they dont care.

Result is that they are now stuck. Rather than asking you (because birthdays in offices are always a bit secret squirrels) they are rocking backwards and forwards on the spot!

[TinyTear]

Not unreasonable at all

Here for birthdays everyone gets card and cake.

this year, my 40th, did i? did i fuck.

ok it's summer and half of the team was away but the OTHER HALF WAS HERE!

and this week (this might out me) we get an email saying it's the boss' 50th can we get a card and balloons and cake.
at least I am away on business but i commented to a colleague - good thing i'm not here or i would make a comment about mine - abd she said 'are you still on about it?'

yes i fucking am... other people may not be into birthdays but i bloody am and this year especially i had my DD in hospital with a chest infection and came to work especially on that day for some normality while DH stayed with DD in hospital and i didn't fucking talk to anyone most of the day.

ahem

sorry OP for letting off my own ishooes

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

Just ask 'is there any reason I never get a birthday card?' Maybe they don't have your birthday written down if they got it wrong previously.

[EssexGurl]

YANBU. But better than one year when I brought in cakes for my birthday first thing in the morning. Cue much scurrying and a card shoved in my hand just as I was leaving. They couldn't have made it more obvious that they had forgotten. I think I would have preferred nothing than that. Made me feel more isolated. At that stage I was the only one working p-t and struggling so I spent all my time working and never got to go out for lunch or to the canteen for coffee. Too much work and not enough hours. Felt like I was the only one working most of the time. I would not have had time to go and buy a card and rush around getting it signed. My day off the day before. They could have done it then.

[AngelaDaviesHair]

Find teh birthday book and write your birthday in it.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I think gamerchick's response is very good - pointed but amusing and not rude.

Sorry you get missed off, gin, I think that if there is such a thing as a birthday list with cards, etc. then nobody should be missed off it if they've elected to take part.

Have cake?

[DuckToWater]

I'd sign the card and say "BTW, is my birthday in the book, as I don't seem to ever get a card?"

[lilyaldrin]

It seems pretty obvious that there's been a mistake in the book for some reason - if it bothers you just tell them rather than seething

[sandfrog]

Yes, ask them.

Or write your birthday in the birthday book on eight different dates

[BeCool]

I think it's fairly clear that your name isn't in the birthday book for whatever reason. Put it in there.

[ginmakesitallok]

Thanks all. It's got to me today because I've been asked to contribute £10 for a Christmas lunch paid for by senior managers for the admin staff (we have a buffet style thing in house). I'm not a senior manager, and only work part time so won't even be there for it.