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To give my one year old these breakfasts?

(35 Posts)
HopAndSkipAlong Tue 10-Dec-13 10:59:54

My ex is staying with us temporarily (on the sofa!) as he broke up with his girlfriend and needs to find somewhere to rent.

He doesn't see much of DD, a couple of hours 2-3 times a month usually, but we get on ok.
He seems to have decided he'd like an input, and along with a list of 'she needs to be washed with a flannel and water after meals not wetwipes', 'cows milk is better than breastmilk once they're toddlers, they need more energy once they're moving about' and how she's 'not learning anything when she's rear facing in the buggy', he's also had a moan about her having fruit and nut little wheetabix as part of yesterday's breakfast, and a 'cooked breakfast' (egg mushrooms tomato bread sausage and beans) today.

I can see his point, that they're not meant to have whole nuts, and that today's is fried, but the nuts are cut up tiny so I wouldn't see them as a choking hazard and it seems silly making a separate meal for her today when it's just one slightly 'unhealthy' meal. AIBU?

HopAndSkipAlong Tue 10-Dec-13 12:11:23

Doesn'tleftover, I wish. He doesn't seem to 'click' with DD for want of a better phrase, it's usually under 5 minutes at soft play before I get a phone call saying she's scared and I need to go back and sit with them, I didn't once and he left DD with a random mum and came out to the cafe to get me. Apparently it was to avoid carrying her screaming but she was happily playing when we got back...!
He's been here since Friday and I've lost count of the amount of times hes said 'she wants you' and got on with texting/watching tv.
Hopefully not long until he's gone, but he's not in contact with his family so not many other options. I had been hoping it would get him interacting more with DD.

Madlizzy Tue 10-Dec-13 12:21:55

Kick him out. You're not responsible for him and it's up to him to find somewhere to live, which is doesn't sound like he's particularly doing.

revivingshower Tue 10-Dec-13 12:22:09

I actually had this problem with dh when dd was little she was very clingy to me. In the end I had to go back to work (it was 3 hrs in the eve)and so he was forced to look after her. At first she did cry for me a lot but she then got used to him. They are very close now.

struggling100 Tue 10-Dec-13 12:23:43

I'm impressed that you can make and cook breakfasts like that with a one year old. Props to you, missus!

sutekidane Tue 10-Dec-13 12:24:33

Good god, you're bonkers letting him stay.

Topaz25 Tue 10-Dec-13 13:06:12

YANBU, it sounds like you have had to manage with your DD basically on your own so far and you are doing your ex a favour letting him crash on the sofa. It doesn't seem like he has his life together so he has no right criticise you! It's very easy for him to have ideas about nutritious and tasty breakfasts for a one year old when he isn't the one who has to make them every day! Tell him he can implement his ideas when he is looking after her and ask if he would like to do that more often. Doesn't he have any friends or family he can stay with?

Topaz25 Tue 10-Dec-13 13:11:14

Sorry I missed your follow up post. He is BVU if he won't help with DD but just criticises the way you do things! It probably stems from a lack of confidence but his parenting isn't going to improve without practice. It doesn't sound like his is making an effort, either with your daughter or finding somewhere to live! I suggest setting a time limit on his stay to motivate him to find alternative accommodation.

revivingshower Tue 10-Dec-13 13:22:58

I agree with the time limit.

specialsubject Tue 10-Dec-13 14:21:52

a bit cheeky - but fruit and nut weetabix are 23% simple sugars, most breakfast cereals are ridiculously sugary.

but it's hardly going to turn her into a blob as an occasional meal.

AnnieJanuary Tue 10-Dec-13 14:58:46

Show him the door! Why's he come crawling to you, doesn't he have parents or friends? Couldn't he have done what everyone else does and look for somewhere to rent whilst remaining in the old property? Or whatever it is people do when they don't have an ex to go to?

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