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To be pissed off at the school..again!

(53 Posts)
extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 21:18:31

Ds2 has ASD and currently only attends school till 1.30 every day because he doesn't cope well with a full school day and partially because the school find him hard to deal with!

The school are hoping to increase his school hours gradually after Christmas to try and get him up to a full day.

Ds2 is in the school Christmas play which is being held at 2pm - I wrongly just assumed that they would agree to let him stay on longer just for that one day so he could take part with everyone else but apparently not, his 1:1 said I could attend the dress rehearsal which is held in the morning the previous day so Ds2 will not actually take part in the 'real' school play.

I also still have to purchase a ticket to watch the dress rehearsal!

AIBU to be pissed off and upset about this? I suspect they don't want Ds taking part in the 'real' play because there is a chance he won't cooperate and might disrupt the play but I just want to be included with everyone else! I know he probably won't care either way but I care. This was going to be his first school play (he wasn't in the last one) and now instead of sitting there with all the other parents watching I will have to sit in the hall on my own if I want to watch him because they won't extend his school day by 1/2hr-1hr for one day!

AIBU? Am I being too sensitive?

snice Sat 30-Nov-13 21:25:54

i remember your other thread about the school-they are treating your son appallingly.
Have you had an advice from Parent partnership on the way school are excluding himfrom afternoon sessions? its not legal surely?

snice Sat 30-Nov-13 21:29:12

oh and I certainly wouldnt be paying to watch the dress rehearsal and I would be speaking to the SENCO about why he was not allowed to be in the Christmas show

snice Sat 30-Nov-13 21:30:18

Parent Partnership

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 21:30:40

Yeah I have posted about issues with the school before!

They have some sort of document in place (can't remember what it's called) that basically makes him exempt from needing to be in school full time so I think have themselves covered legally :/

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 21:31:50

The Senco at the school is also the head teacher so I'm guessing he knows about it and is ok with it sad

YouTheCat Sat 30-Nov-13 21:33:42

As far as I'm aware all children, additional needs or not, are entitled to a full time education.

Have a look at the link and see if they can help.

snice Sat 30-Nov-13 21:34:23

yes that happens in our primary-a terrible conflict of interest IMO

Hawkmoon269 Sat 30-Nov-13 21:36:08

I'm going to stick my head above the parapets here and suggest that YABU. You acknowledge that your ds probably doesn't mind not being in the main play. And if his watchers think it's likely he might be disruptive, I understand why they might want to avoid any hassle (or upset for other children).

If he really minded, then I wouldn't think YABU but maybe his teachers are also aware that he doesn't mind one way or another so are taking the easy option?

Hawkmoon269 Sat 30-Nov-13 21:36:49

Teachers, not watchers!

toffeesponge Sat 30-Nov-13 21:38:13

Who is doing his part in the proper show then?

tethersend Sat 30-Nov-13 21:38:25

There is no document which makes him exempt from being entitled to a full time education.

Is suspect he is on a Pastoral Support Plan (PSP)?

A part time timetable can be used as part of a reintegration plan, but only with parental consent. Legally, he is entitled to 25 hours of education per week, be that at school, 1:1 tuition, HE or at another centre.

Does he have a statement?

hoppingmad Sat 30-Nov-13 21:38:58

Have you got any support with this? What form makes him exempt? They have a duty to provide full time education for every school age child (or rather the council does)
Drop me a pm if you are feeling a bit bullied by the school and I can point you in the direction of a couple of people who may help.

In the meantime put your foot down. They are discriminating against him. He has an absolute right to be in the actual play, not sidelined like that.

Couple of tips - document everything, every phone call, letter, chat with teacher Etc. unfortunately you may need this someday. Asd is undersupported & misunderstood by far too many schools.

tethersend Sat 30-Nov-13 21:39:51

I think excluding him from the show altogether may breach the Equalty Act.

CoffeeTea103 Sat 30-Nov-13 21:39:57

Yabu, why would he be able to cope on the one this day being longer and not others? He still has a chance to perform in the play this way. It would be unfair to he others who practiced very hard if he isn't able to cope with the longer day. You shouldn't have to pay for the rehearsal though.

tethersend Sat 30-Nov-13 21:40:05


hoppingmad Sat 30-Nov-13 21:43:25

Coffee, I would bet a weeks wages its the school that doesn't cope. With the right support and procedures in places the vast majority of children with asd do manage an entire school day - be this in mainstream or specialist.
Here we have yet another family being failed by the education system angry

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 21:53:52

Yes that is the one tethers smile

He has been on it since the beginning of the year, he was supposed to have his hours increased up to full time by June but that hasn't happened sad

I actually think he could cope with a slightly longer day, he has been hitting all his set targets & I think would benefit from being pushed a little harder!

The ed psych actually commented during our last TAC meeting that the school needs to start increasing his hours & give him the opportunity to learn how to manage because if he is never given the chance he never will get used to it! He dealt with the first increase (1-1.30) just fine so I think the school are kind of avoiding the work that may come with extending his hours.

He is a cow toffee so I don't think that's too vital a role to miss in the overall production :D

I know it will make life easier for everyone else if he isn't in it, especially if he isn't bothered one way or another but it just grates on me that any other child would not be excluded like this - he already has his lessons in the library instead of the classroom & I just want him to be treated like everyone else sad

tethersend Sat 30-Nov-13 22:22:27

The school are acting unlawfully, A PSP does not relieve them (or, more specifically, the LEA) of their duty to provide him with a full time education.

At the next PSP review, or sooner if it is more than a week or so away, make it very clear that you are withdrawing your support for the part time timetable, and that you expect him to be in full time provision by Christmas. It is then up to the school to liaise with the LEA to arrange this.

Have you contacted anyone from the LEA?

Does he have a statement?

tethersend Sat 30-Nov-13 22:23:05

If he's been meeting all his PSP targets, why is he still on one?

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 22:25:36

Yes he does have a statement smile

nennypops Sat 30-Nov-13 22:28:20

Seriously, get legal advice, or at the very least phone IPSEA or SOS SEN. It is totally illegal for ds only to have part time education - if he can't cope with being in school then the local authority should be organising home tuition for the rest of the time. But probably the reality is that he could cope in school if they make sure he is properly supported. And preventing him from taking part in the play is definitely disability discrimination.

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 22:30:00

Not sure, I think it's because he is still on a part time timetable - the targets he has been set are mostly speech & language related although a few were behavioural (hitting & kicking when stressed etc) but the behavioural stuff has virtually stopped and all the s&l stuff has been reached & they will be setting new targets after Christmas.

They don't seem to want to give him new targets & increase his hours simultaneously in order not to overload him but I have a nagging feeling this may be another excuse :/

NoComet Sat 30-Nov-13 22:30:02

The DDs primary managed to find a way of always involving their statemented 1to1 pupil.

It brought tears to the watching mum's eyes when they all the children cheered and clapped his first width of the swimming pool.

I've seen your other threads and the school really needs to do better including your DS as a full member of the school community or admit they can't cope.

extremepie Sat 30-Nov-13 22:34:13

It's also possible that they are reluctant to increase the hours because his 1:1 works with other children when he is not there - it's possible that increasing his hours would mean they have one less member of staff for other things making life more difficult for them :/

All speculation though, it's just a suspicion I have!

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