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to ask you to tell all about your bad guest staying at your house stories ?

(93 Posts)
thisfoofooisallmine Thu 21-Nov-13 13:55:17

It has been ages we didn't have one and I'm sorry I can't wait for after Christmas ! I'm sure you had guest who stayed with you recently who were big piss takers, they ate all your food and didn't even bring a bottle of wine with them or they brought pizzas but wanted to charge you for it....

Please make me happy, I never ask anything ! This topic always put a smile on my face smile

PocketFluff Sun 24-Nov-13 13:52:59

curious georgie I love that you have an emergency bottle of wine!

samithesausage Sun 24-Nov-13 10:58:18

I know, in the end he was given a 8pm cut off point. I didn't realise this but he had a bit of an obsession about me and got counselling in the end.

We arnt used to dealing with people who outstay their welcome. Normally people leave at 8 at the latest!

paxtecum Sun 24-Nov-13 10:54:47

My niece came over from the other side of the world for a couple of years.
She stayed with her GPs, who are my parents.
They live on a tight budget, no private pensions, only state pensions.

She got a good job here earning a lot of money.
My parents wouldn't take any 'rent' or food money off her.
She often visited friends 30 miles away, but refused to go on the train as it was too expensive and wouldn't go on the bus as it took too long.
My DM used to drive her there and pick her up the next day.
She never offered her any petrol money.

She never cleaned her room out.
She used their phone to ring her boyfriend's mobile.
She spent all her time there in her room, as they irriitated her and she couldn't be bothered talking to them.

When she left, after a year, my DPs cleaned out her room and found carrier bags of used STs and other rubbish in the wardrobe.

She didn't even buy them a bunch of flowers when she left.

I do wonder if I'll ever mention this to her Dad, my brother, who actually thinks she is Little Miss Perfect.

YouTheCat Sun 24-Nov-13 10:42:59

Sami, even little old non-confrontational me would have had to be more direct in that case and just asked him to leave. I would have been apologetic but he would have been chivvied out the door at tea time.

What a nightmare!

samithesausage Sun 24-Nov-13 10:33:07

Had a friend who had a thing about me. He would ring the house constantly and me and my dad (I live with my dad and my dcs) would just let the answer phone get it.
He turns up on the doorstep. "I was worried because she wasn't answering her phone"
Nan let's him in. He sits on the sofa and doesn't leave. It's tea time, so he gets a sanmdwich and cup of tea, I hint about bath times for the kids and get "oh I don't mind if you bath them".
Bath times done, I mention it's their bed time only he won't go. The kids won't go to sleep (they have always had problems sleeping). They won't go to bed because he's there. 8'o'clock, 9 O'clock come and go. Kids won't go and have their heads on my lap sobbing. I try to take them to bed, he follows me in. Kids won't have it and run out again.
10'O'clock the kids are too exhausted and sleep. I put them to bed.
I say to my dad put our pyjamas on and he'll get the hint.
11'O'clock me and my dad are sitting in our pyjamas and he's still there.
11:30 dad starts hinting about me getting him ready for bed, (he's disabled, but he was exagerating for him to take the hint)
Dad didn't want to be followed into the bedroom so didn't get ready to bed.
In the end nan comes out with "well I'm going to have to stay the night now, whens he going to bloody leave"
Then asks him direct "it's nearly midnight are you going - the kids have nursery in the morning?"
Eventually he leaves at 1am!

mumteedum Sun 24-Nov-13 07:39:30

Years ago a work colleague asked if I could put his gf up for a week whilst she was flat hunting, as his landlord wouldn't allow 'guests'. She was nice so I said ok.

Gf was v pleasant but kept offering me rent, which I refused as it was only q favour fir a few days. Turns out this wasn't the impression he'd given. Think she thought we were now house sharing.

Came home from work on monday after first weekend to find her and colleague cooking Their dinner (not for me too). I had to wait ages to get my own cos kitchen was tiny. Same thing next night. I was having stressful time at work & personal life anyway so I went out to friend's house to relax away from house guests.

Came home later to find back door open (dodgy area) and them shagging noisily upstairs.

Eventually she moved in with him as wasn't a problem with landlord after all.

Oh yeah also male colleagues at work were all fussing over the poor girl staying in rough area! I lived alone at the time!

curiousgeorgie Sun 24-Nov-13 01:44:19

I had one night off to spend with DH, was a very lovely evening, sitting on the decking, glass of wine, evening sun.

Doorbell. DH's friend. Comes in, drinks all wine. Then drinks all emergency bottle of wine. Then a very questionable bottle of cava.

Very loud, drunken conversation and wakes up newborn baby and toddler repeatedly.

Too drunk to drive so 'crashes' in my newly decorated (as in, brand new everything, never been slept in) spare room.

Wake up in the morning, makes himself breakfast, says his goodbyes and leaves.

I go up to spare room to strip the bed, and my brand new white sheets are covered in sick. Red wine sick. Soaked through to stain my brand new pillows. 3 out of 4 of them. Oh, and the brand new mattress. And a bit on the carpet. And even a splatter on the wall. It's like the exorcist happened in there.

The bathroom is Next Door.
TELL me you did it!!

He text DH saying what he'd done, and that he was sorry and he would buy new sheets.

We're still waiting!!

80sbabe Sun 24-Nov-13 00:11:09

A distant relative once came to stay with us - they live abroad and she was doing a tour of Europe. She was supposed to stay with some other relations (arranged about a year in advance) but unexpected and sad circumstances intervened and they were unable to accommodate her with just two days notice - so following a desperate begging email we offered to step in rather than leave her thousands of miles from home with no accommodation.

DH and I both work full time and this was the week before Christmas - neither of us could organise extra time off as we had a holiday booked over Christmas week so we said she was welcome to stay but would have to amuse herself / chill out at ours while we worked and DCs were at school.
To say she was unappreciative of our efforts would be a huge understatement, she also turned out to be the most awkward person I have ever met in my life.

Nothing I cooked that week was acceptable - even though after the first night of her refusing dinner I asked what she did like so she could be fed. Even after shopping especially for her and cooking different food to suit she still ate sod all. When offered a glass of wine she accepted and then "didn't like" red, white, rose or fizzy - what the hell else is there ? confused

She wouldn't join in family evening time and went to bed straight after sitting at the dining table and grumbling about the food every night.
He room was too hot, then too cold, then the bed wasn't comfortable, so we moved her to another room and shuffled the DCs around - she still wasn't happy as that room was too quiet and she still couldn't sleep.

We bought Christmas presents for her to take home for herself, her DH and her DCs and when she'd left we found them under the bed opened and obviously deemed unacceptable. She also put Christmas cards that DD1 had lovingly made at school for her and her family in the bin - nice eh ? sad

I did manage to swing a half day from work and took her out for lunch and to see to a very famous University City - she "didn't get" the point of the city and complained about the service and (yet again) the food in the restaurant (personally I thought it was excellent).

She moaned about me disturbing her when I was packing for us to go away on holiday, we were due to leave the day she was going so it was a job I had no choice about.

Finally when we came home from our holiday she had sent us a postcard from the airport saying how she thought we were bad parents for both working and using childcare for our youngest DD and that she wished our children luck as they would need it hmm

I'm sure there was much more that I've missed here but my memory has selectively blocked it out grin
Thankfully she unfriended both DH and I on Facebook soon after her visit and we've never heard from her since.
Absolutely the last time we offer anyone we dont already know well housespace in an emergency grin

CrabbySmallerBottom Sat 23-Nov-13 21:21:18

I'm not sure about your am/pms there rach...

I'm hugely entertained by all these, but utterly gobsmacked that you put up with this kind of behaviour from people. Why on earth would you let them in to you home - I wouldn't! shock

londonrach Sat 23-Nov-13 17:49:09

I have one..

Husband uni friend from italy said he be visiting the uk and as we lived in. London could he stay. We lived in a tiny 1 and a half box rented flat. Spent two days cleaning the flat, getting nice food in and making the spare room look really lovely. He said he be with us by 12pm so we all ready, food etc waiting....nothing. Husband texted him. Yes he was coming... Time passed 2pm, 3pm, 4pm..... Cooked the lunch for us to eat. Husband getting very worried. I rechecked the special towels etc we got. At 7 pm we got a text saying in local pub. Surprised we put our coats on and popped out to meet him very find he wasnt alone..... We talked and waited whilst he ordered food and drink for him and his new lady friend... Time passed and as not much money husband and kept our lime and lemonade going. 11am passesd...i need my bed and the time keeps going....12pm.....1pm arrives....husbands friend suggests a night cap at new friend. Husband says no as we both very tired but askes friend to ring doorbell when he wants to come in. We left. 3pm we got a text saying he staying at new friend, nice to see us but returning to italy next day so will go straight from new friends....

shoppingbagsundereyes Sat 23-Nov-13 17:33:06

My worst ever guests were my father and step mother. They came over from Australia and stayed with us for a month when ds was only 6 weeks old. Worst month of my life. My father was doing some kind of odd Atkins diet and would eat no vegetables, salad or fruit. Step mother was gluten intolerant but would happily eat cake. I was vegetarian. So every night between ds screaming for hours either dh or I cooked 3 meals or 3 versions of the same meal. They didn't once offer to cook or shop ( we lived opposite tesco at the time) or get a takeaway. They took us out for a meal once.
Step mother hogged the washing machine and washing line with their washing so much so that I couldn't get baby ds' clothes washed and dried. She told me I was ironing stuff the wrong way and that I hung the washing out to dry the wrong way. Dh was at work most days so I was stuck entertaining them.
Was hideous.

astyinmyeye Sat 23-Nov-13 17:01:12

shameless bump

Mitchell2 Sat 23-Nov-13 13:52:15

oh my, some of these stories.... Mine is no where near as bad as those

One Of the sadder ones I have ever heard was from one of my best friends. An old school friend (male) needed somewhere to stay for a few weeks. She was fine with that, and in the main he was a great house guest. It was only after he left that she realised that her laptop, that he had been regularly using, wasn't working. Off she trotted innocently to the repair shop who promptly told her that the issue was related to all the hardcore porn that had been down loaded and there were multiple viruses needless to say she was mortified blush. She had to pay ££ to get it fixed so she casually /tactfully mentioned it to the guy who was like oh that wouldn't have been me, all the sites that I usually go on I don't have any issues like that and refused to pay. As she was the only other person who ever used it and the history verified that it was indeed him she was suitably pissed.

bdbfan Sat 23-Nov-13 12:16:37

Bumping this

AuroraRoared Fri 22-Nov-13 17:21:50

We had a friend and his new wife come to stay for a couple of days. He and DH spent quite a lot of the time chatting and catchin up because it had been a long time since they'd been able to do that.

I was left with the friend's wife, who was just so difficult! She stuck torn out magazine pages all over the bedroom window, I've got no idea why because there was a perfectly good blackout blind in there. It meant that over the few days they were staying the room became really stale, and it was like a dungeon in there.

I would try to chat to her, just basic everyday chit chat and she'd look at me really snootily and not reply.

She made several really snide remarks about our house, the food we eat etc. The icing on the cake was when DH and friend were off playing golf for the day, so I invited her into town to do some shopping, have some lunch etc, as she had not actually left the house in several days. She looked at me, and said, "Oh, I've got much better things to do than that" and retired back to their dark, smelly bedroom, which is where she had spent most of the visit (apart from meals).

She was very hard work and I was glad to see the back of her. But she wasn't in the same league as some other stories on here. shock

HollyBrrr Fri 22-Nov-13 14:38:26

Furious on behalf of all the posters above!

I have a few stories. Two are about the same friend, who is LOVELY, but very young for his age. He stayed for a few months with us at one point when I was working away from home during the week. My DH and I came back one Friday evening (when friend knew we would be around) to about 20 empty packets of crisps strewn across the entire flat and dirty boxers and a used condom on the bathroom floor.

On another occasion he and another friend came over to stay, slept in our living room and covered it in their clothes and belongings, so that it was impossible to walk across the floor or sit on our sofa. We bought a load of food to make a big fry up for all 4 of us in the morning. DH and I went out early for a few hours to get some stuff done, and came back at 10am to discover friends had cooked and eaten all of the food we'd bought, leaving DH and I without any brunch.

Another story involves my aunt, who came to stay with my parents when I was very little. She smoked indoors, despite knowing that my parents didn't approve, and the smoke ended up killing my two beloved stick insects. She also snored so loudly that there was literally no where in the house where the sound didn't resonate through the walls. No sleep for us that night!

Betrayedbutsurvived Fri 22-Nov-13 11:33:29

Ooo I've got one. ExMIL claimed that she would be alone one Christmas as the friend she usually stayed with had gone abroad. ExH and I had always gone to my parents at Christmas but we couldn't see her alone, so changed all our plans and invited her to stay from Christmas Eve to Boxing Day. She turned up empty handed, not even a card much less presents for the kids, with a complete stranger in tow who she introduced as her new "man friend" they walked in, plonked themselves on the sofa then exMIL announced that she'd have a white wine and man friend would have a beer. They then sat, eating, drinking and smoking (despite me saying several times I didn't want smoking in the house, and us being non smokers )for the rest of the day. They even smoked at the dinner table and burnt a hole in my table cloth. When man friend arrived on Christmas Eve I'd sent ex out to buy him an emergency present, so Christmas morning arrives and we dish out the presents, nothing for us, or the kids, man friend unwraps his present, wrinkles his nose and says I don't drink whiskey, exMIL barely glances at her present, much less thanks us. The one good thing is that they announced they'd rather be at home immediately after lunch, and I mean literally after the last bite was eaten, and left, thank god.

wink1970 Fri 22-Nov-13 11:06:43

Oh dear, I came on here to post about my DM's insistence on new loo roll & tissues in the bathroom when she stayed, but this pails into insignificance alongside these stories!

We were once guests at a friend's luxury villa (and I mean NICE) and for some reason DH had also invited a workmate & his wife, the latter turned out to be a raving alcoholic lunatic who puked in the swimming pool, punched a local waiter, fell asleep in her supper (face down, spaghetti, lovely) and ripped the curtains down 'to get more light'. My friendship with the original friend lasted a couple of years more until she moved away, but boy did she never live it down!

Crowler Fri 22-Nov-13 10:58:09

I'm snorting at the pool & pilot's license. Hilarious. Although your bad back explains it!

FurryGiraffe Fri 22-Nov-13 10:54:22

FIL and Step MIL arranged to come and visit a couple of weeks after DS was born (they live several hours away). We didn't really want overnight visitors so soon so arranged (and paid) for them to stay in a B and B round the corner. The day before they announced they were bringing DH's stepsister (20) and she could sleep on our sofa: as they were already away from home, staying with friends close by at this point, there wasn't really an option to say no.

So they all arrived in the morning. After lunch I raised the topic of dinner and asked if everyone was ok with jacket potatoes and chilli, with strawberries and ice cream after. No objections until we served up, at which point Step MIL asked whether there was chilli in the chilli, as it really upsets her stomach. I said yes there was chilli in it and offered alternative fillings for the jacket potatoes. She adopted a matyred air and then ate the chilli. Come dessert, I was dishing up strawberries and she said to Step sister "you don't like strawberries do you, are you on sure you want some?" I suggested she just have ice cream, but SS made revolted face and said she'd eat some strawberries.

The day they left, I had a doctors' appointment and DH had work so we said they'd need to collect SS and leave by 10 but suggested they come early and have a cup of tea first. At 9.15 SS hadn't got up so I knocked on the door. FIL and SMIL didn't turn up until 9.50, at which point SS still hadn't emerged. I was thoroughly fed up and need to leave or be late and ushered them all out of the door sharpish as SS complained about lack of breakfast and SMIL said it was a shame she couldn't spend more time with DS.

FIL hasn't visited since but says he wants to come in the new year. I'm not keen unless he leaves them at home!

fromparistoberlin Fri 22-Nov-13 10:36:48

recent honeymoooners (DPs side of the family) stayed 10 days

sat on sofa all the fucking time
did not help once
sat at table, ate, then fucked off
heavy petting on sofa (yuk)
did not seem to like my city much
did not buy anything, not even hostess gift
did not bring any money with them
did not cook, tidy or wash up once for ten days
did not respond to basic conversational overtures


PosyNarker Fri 22-Nov-13 10:29:26

Not as bad as some of these, but...

When I was a student a friend from home came to stay for the weekend. I had a two bed flat and was letting out the second bedroom to another student, so I said this was fine, but she'd either need sleeping bag in the living room or to share my double bed. Fine, we're both girls so we'll share. We hadn't seen each other in about a year and so were looking forward to spending some time together catching up.

She arrived late and wanted to go clubbing. We went out to a rock club where she proceeded to pick up some dodgy bloke and spend the night snogging him. He disappears and we're getting ready to go. Suddenly dodgy bloke appears again and will 'walk us home'. Get to the flat door, cue screaming tantrum about if I don't let them both in for a nightcap, she's going off with bloke, but she can't stay at his, so can I give them a key or she'll need to 'sleep in the park' hmm.

Knackered and totally fucked off by this point, I say fine to the nightcap and let them in. She then asks if I can sleep on my own living room floor and give her my bed as they want to have a shag shock. I say no and he has to go, so she lets him out and I go to bed. She's staying up 'for a cuppa' and is 'pissed off with me' so will sleep on the couch.

Next morning flatmate stumbles over her and dodgy bloke (she'd obviously let him back in), naked on my living room floor, having pulled all the cushions off my settees. Dodgy bloke is given his marching orders and friend decides to leave a day early as we'd been unwelcoming. I thought maybe she was going off with bloke, but no, because he was 'just a random', 'not very good' and 'a bit weird wasn't he?'.

So off she fucks and I had to shampoo my carpet due to the suspicious stains jizz on my living room floor. hmm

I haven't seen her since. I shouldn't have been surprised, she had form for shagging anything that moved and in retrospect was one of those women who only need friends when they've not got a man, any man.

SlightlyDampWellies Fri 22-Nov-13 10:27:01

Yes indeed! They were pretty elderly, and to be honest I think they just completely failed to realise that other people's lives were not like theirs. It was quite surreal at times.

FruOla Fri 22-Nov-13 10:22:23

"They suggested I get a pilot's licence, buy a plane and fly to London each day."

That's even more ridiculous - they sound bonkers grin grin

SlightlyDampWellies Fri 22-Nov-13 10:15:05

Actually, that has brought back another memory of this couple I had forgotten. I was then doing a horror daily commute to London and back and it was wearing me down. They suggested I get a pilot's licence, buy a plane and fly to London each day. They were quite serious. (I think ... no, I know they were really exceedingly wealthy. The husband had his own helicopter when he was in the City. So why they wanted to crash with the adult children of friends instead of staying in a fucking B&B is a bit beyond me).

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