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AIBU?

Children's party related

25 replies

rockdakazbah · 21/11/2013 11:54

This is my first AIBU so please be gentle! DS's birthday is at Christmas so we always have his party at the beginning of December. From previous birthdays we know to give people plenty of notice as I know diaries fill up over Christmas.

We sent invitations out about 3 weeks ago. To save money we made them ourselves on the computer. No one has RSVP'd yet but this is not the issue I'm fuming about.

Today when I went to pick DS up from nursery I noticed that he had received a party invitation from two of his friends having a joint party. The party is one week before DS's party and they have copied the exact style of invitation and the party is exactly the same (soft play) but one week earlier. I'm worried parents won't want to take their children to two parties that are the same two weeks in a row and with DS's party being the later of the two, people won't come. All of them will be turning 4.

AIBU to be really annoyed?

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Lilacroses · 21/11/2013 11:56

Was it an invitation from the soft play place if you know what I mean?

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BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 21/11/2013 11:57

Of course YABU - people can have their parties where and when they like.

You will get millions of invites to the same soft play centre, I doubt you started the trend.

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rockdakazbah · 21/11/2013 11:58

No it was a home made invitation as was theirs, using a picture of DS and a balloon background

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JinglingRexManningDay · 21/11/2013 11:58

Was it one of those invite template ones?

If not then its a bit weird.

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JinglingRexManningDay · 21/11/2013 11:59

Omg did they use a pic of your ds?

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GwendolineMaryLacey · 21/11/2013 11:59

As far as the parties are concerned, don't worry about people not going to the same party twice. IME (dd1 is about to turn 6) you'll always get the same places popping up. I'm trying to plan her 6th party for Jan and can't think of anywhere that hasn't already been done a dozen times!

It might be that nowhere else had the availability, or it was the only place in their budget, or they just might have copied you. Hard to tell. I guess I'd be a bit Hmm

Unless the invitations were issued by the party place then it's a bit of a cheek copying yours. At least you know yours went out first :)

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BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 21/11/2013 12:00

But seriously who cares about what the invitations look like?? I find it hard to believe anyone would get their knickers in a twist about an invitation.

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Lilacroses · 21/11/2013 12:00

Ummm yes that is a bit odd!! Not the part about them having the party at the same place, that happens all the time and they may actually have planned it before you, but the exact same invitation is slightly weird! I bet people will come to yours too though.

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cornflakegirl · 21/11/2013 12:02

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery! And my 4yo would go to soft play every day if he could, so I wouldn't worry about repetition. Hope the party goes well.

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itscockyfoxagain · 21/11/2013 12:11

There are 3 options for children's party's ; soft play, hire a hall discos and at home parties.
There will always be repetition, no one minds even if it feels like you are at the same place every weekend it is only a few years before children grow out of it.
Parties often clash you will get to know whose birthdays are when and chat to yhe other mums so there are less clashes as the children get older.
They probably thought your invites were goohd so did did similar. Not everyone you invite will want to go to anyway even if it is the first party in months.
None of it is a big deal so yes YABU.

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TheSurgeonsMate · 21/11/2013 12:16

I think people will come. At our nursery two three year olds had their party on the same day. Not everyone went to both, although dd did. There were people at the second party, and there were people at the first party (which had issued invites second). And people went to the party a few weeks later held in the same soft play.

(And everyone who has received two invites can see that the invite has been copied.)

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HalleLouja · 21/11/2013 12:18

Are you sure the nursery staff handed out the invites? It does look like they did due to the freaky other invite but it might explain the lack of RSVPs.

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Laurel1979 · 21/11/2013 13:36

I can empathise with the stress of awaiting party replies!! DD's birthday is next week, I booked soft play ages ago and the day before she brought in her invitations, another child from the same class gave out invitations to her party, on the same date and on the same day!! Luckily they are at different times (and DD's is earlier in the day) but I was really worried people wouldn't go to both. I phoned the other mum, we had a laugh about it and agreed it will be extra fun having 2 parties. It's so annoying waiting for rsvp's though..... 3 still haven't replied, I had to confirm numbers yesterday so will be interesting to see if they turn up. The same 3 are the same ones who all did similar last year, God knows why I invited them again!

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Laurel1979 · 21/11/2013 13:37

Sorry above should say the 2 parties are in the same soft play place on the same day

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coppertop · 21/11/2013 13:43

Did you put an RSVP date? If not, people might have thought they had plenty of time as the party was still weeks away.

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ICameOnTheJitney · 21/11/2013 13:51

Rock Having been on the party circuit for 5 years now I can tell you the majority WILL come. Makes no odds that there's another.

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ICameOnTheJitney · 21/11/2013 13:52

AND at least he got an invite! Would have been worse otherwise!

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ICameOnTheJitney · 21/11/2013 13:54

I am stopping all this nonsense next year. DD2 is 5 and when she turns 6 she's allowed 5 mates home for tea. I'm tired of paying hundreds for meh parties which are replicas of everyone elses. The one party she remembers from reception last year was her friend Tom's. He invited 4 friends to his house for tea...they had games, cake, party bags and she was thrilled with it all.

Comes to something when a traditional birthday tea is a novelty!

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DIYapprentice · 21/11/2013 14:11

Although their invites only came out recently, I doubt that they have only just booked the soft play venue. All of them around here become booked out quite early, especially for winter parties.

Copying the invite might be a bit hmm, but if their DC saw it and liked it they might have pestered for something similar.

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TheWitTank · 21/11/2013 14:45

Are you sure it's not just a coincidence? How do you know they hadn't planned and booked the place weeks ago? The invite thing is a bit strange if its exactly the same, but hey ho, it's a kids party, I doubt the mums and dads have given it a second thought. I'm sure people will come so stop fretting. Maybe they are sitting at home thinking "ooo that bloody bitch from school copied my location and invite..."

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Mim78 · 21/11/2013 14:51

Everyone we know seems to have their parties in two or three of the same places! None of the children seem to mind. You could send round a reminder asking people to RSVP by a particular date if you are worried.

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ToffeePenny · 21/11/2013 14:56

YANBU on the invite - surely they could have come up with something original by themselves.

I'd be fine with the repetition on party format though - at that age they benefit from having a 'rehearsal' so you will get partygoers who know the procedure (when to play, sing, not to open the presents etc) so the whole thing should run more smoothly.

I wouldn't worry on the attendance - people will come to the one (or both) that suits them but it may be worth cornering a few at the school gate. Alternatively, play dirty - spread a rumour that there will be Wine for the grown ups as well as Cake at yours...

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stealthsquiggle · 21/11/2013 14:59

Invitation copying is weird.

Venue/format duplication is inevitable, I think - and 4yos won't care (and, as others have said, will be more into their stride by DS's party so you can regard the other one as the warm up act Wink)

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redskyatnight · 21/11/2013 15:03

DD once went to 3 soft play parties at the same venue in the space of 2.5 weeks!

I think YABU, it's obviously a favourite venue of children of this age in your area. Also, these sorts of parties are usually booked months ahead so it's not as though they've spotted you are having a party there and decided to annoy you.

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ICameOnTheJitney · 21/11/2013 15:06

Red that's pretty normal for us too...people just use the same two soft play centres and it annoys me so much as they're both a bit skanky!

However....I wouldn't dream of not going just because two kids had it within a week OP...most will come you watch.

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