to become a recluse. .

[OhMyBridget]

I desperately need to loose weight, Its somthing I know I can do..but to be successful I have to have control over my food constantly. I.e- Food shop carefully planned and meals planned so nothing is in the house that may derail me. At the minute I have zero will power and binge at the drop of a hat. If there's even the slightest wiggle room to eat something naughty or unplanned, I cannot control myself. After a while, this will past and I become strong, can be trusted to eat out and choose well etc.

I have tried and failed to get started all year because every social engagement or night out presents the opportunity to go mad with food or wine! Its pretty pathetic really, but addressing this issue means I can make a plan to help myself.

Now.. im thinking Im going to have to be a recluse and avoid social engagements for a while until im in the swing of things. My dh now thinks I'm nuts.

to put it into context I have 4st of extra weight to loose, for me to reach the top end of healthy bmi. As it stands we can't conceive no2 because of my weight (had the same with dd1) .. and its generally affecting my mental health. I need to focus.

aibu to think its sensible for me to remove myself from situations that could railroad me for the time being?

[RevengeWiggle]

As long as it's not permanent, you will have to face these things eventually so learning some willpower needs to be part of it. I understand needing to get into the swing of it though, I don't have much motivation until I start to see the weight coming off.

[OhMyBridget]

precious I didn't think it was very often but I seem to get stuck at playdates having lunch out.. we go out maybe two evenings a month but often host friends here.

it won't be permanent (that would be silly! ) but im not getting anywhere because if I do binge, it spills into the rest of the week.It can take me two weeks to buck up my ideas and get back on the wagon and then a week later it'll be another social get together and the process continues. So in a month instead of having small consistent weight losses, I spend two weeks going nuts.. one week being positively angelic and then another week guilt eating over lack of loss and poor willpower. and repeat. ..

[Joysmum]

I lost 6.5 stone a couple of years ago. I removed myself from life to break the cycle and keep me focused. Then as time progressed and I learnt new skills I gradually eased back in but couldn't be consistent in that and opted out in my tough times.

It takes time and you have a lot of issue to deal with, habits to break and new ones to form and this can't be done at the click of your fingers.

I felt very guilty as a mother that my family were suffering but it didn't last and has been so worth while. It's hard to act on self interest if you think it impacts negatively on your nearest and dearest but it so worth it.

Oh and prepare to bombarded by 'experts' who will tell you what you need to do, we are all different and need to find our own way which is why I won't try to talk you into doing it my way!

Good luck.