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To make DH pay for DS's coat

(37 Posts)
armadillosocial Sun 03-Nov-13 10:53:49

DH has taken the week off.

I've had work to do see he has taken kids out on day trips.

DS1 has lost his new coat. Proper winter storm proof thing.

DS1 says he gave it to FIL to hold when he was in the park.

It's now nowhere to be seen.

DH & FIL are denying all responsibility, saying both that he never had it AND they brought it back.

What's more DH is saying DS1 can't have a new one as he needs to learn a lesson shock

He knows that obviously I won't let him go all winter without a decent coat.

I understand that things get lost but it's DH's washing his hands of the whole thing which is annoying me.

I'm furious.

DH thinks I should be grateful for him looking after kids while I work but I expect them to be looked after properly confused

SteamWisher Sun 03-Nov-13 13:08:30

This is a 7 year old child right?

And I assume that is DH is one of two parents, right?

1 - Your DH shouldn't have to pay because it surely comes out of one pot of money for your family. Otherwise you end up with ridiculous situations where one parent claims to be subsidising the other even if it means in reality they're providing basics for their own children

2-your DH and you shouldn't be having blackmail type stand offs when the result is that your kid is caught in the middle.

Both of you need to grow up a bit.

SoupDragon Sun 03-Nov-13 13:11:49

To be fair to DH - he hasn't outwardly said I should be grateful, and he has done it willingly.

So, you made that bit up then?

soverylucky Sun 03-Nov-13 13:23:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZombieMojaveWonderer Sun 03-Nov-13 13:35:48

Jeez I can't believe you are arguing over a coat! Just buy the poor kid a new coat. Who cares who pays for it surely it comes from the family pot!

MortifiedAnyFuckerAdams Sun 03-Nov-13 13:40:41

In.our house, we, so a new coat would come out.of the pot.

Do you and dh keep your money separate?

Have you asked ds where the coat is?

marriedinwhiteisback Sun 03-Nov-13 13:43:25

Just buy a cheap new coat and chalk it up to experience. IME coats get lost - it's one of the sad consequences of having children. As soon as you get a new one though you do realise the old one will turn don't you. My friend found one of DS's only the other week when she had her house decorated - well a fleece actually but it was a lovely navy M&S one that I remember being cross about at the time. It was age 7-8 - DS is nearly 19 grin.

MostWicked Sun 03-Nov-13 14:42:35

Your son needs a coat for winter. It would be neglectful not to have one. So buy him a coat. When he is out with an adult, that adult should take responsibility for things like that.

Justforlaughs Sun 03-Nov-13 14:47:04

Our house rule has always been that if DCs lose/ break something out of carelessness then it will be replaced as cheaply as possible. So if DS has a Superdry coat and leaves it at the park then it may well be replaced with an Asda/ charity shop item. 7 is a bit young for this though, imo, dad was responsible for bringing the coat hoe - in fact he should have been responsible for making sure that DS was wearing it!

Darkesteyes Sun 03-Nov-13 16:57:50

DH & FIL are denying all responsibility, saying both that he never had it AND they brought it back.

This statement alone tells me that neither of them think childcare is their responsibility really.

FunkyFucker Sun 03-Nov-13 17:18:48

*DH & FIL are denying all responsibility, saying both that he never had it AND they brought it back•

They can't have brought something back that they never took so either they took it and lost it or they brought it back in which case they better start looking for it...

ThisWayForCrazy Sun 03-Nov-13 17:19:50

I haven't read anyone else's comments.

My questions are this..

Why on earth does it matter who replaces the coat between you and DH? Are you not a couple?

Why are you supposed to be grateful he "looked after" his own kids?

Why is loosing a coat not looking after them properly?

This relationship/family seems disjointed and not at all a union.

LaQueenOfTheDamned Sun 03-Nov-13 18:02:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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