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to think a woman carrying heavy furniture isn't remarkable?

(56 Posts)
misspontypine Fri 01-Nov-13 21:04:22

Me and dp went to collect our new sofa today, it's a largish corner bed sofa. It came in 3 bits.

Me and dp live on the 4th floor and we have no lift.

3 separate neighbors came and said things like "well done for choosing such a strong wife!" "were non of your mates free to help you?" "let ne help, I know I have a bad back but your not going to manage that without help, misspontypine can hold open the door."

I'm not especially strong, average I'd imagine, I have a chunky toddler that a carry lug around all day, I guess that helps with stamina.

Aibu to expect in this day in age it shouldn't just be men that are expected to carry heavy things?

Coldlightofday Fri 01-Nov-13 21:07:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Coldlightofday Fri 01-Nov-13 21:07:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fossil971 Fri 01-Nov-13 21:11:34

Last year I carried some heavy equipment at a school event that the dads were struggling with and people are still talking about it! You are right, they weren't heavier than carrying a hulking toddler and pushchair. Sometimes I think equality is in reverse, I really do.

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 01-Nov-13 21:16:43

Same with putting together furniture. My friend and I were happily (with wine) putting together a bed, when our respective DHs got back. They took over, blustered, made a pig's ear of it and complained. Why their penises (penii?) made them more capable, I shall never know.

LimitedEditionLady Sat 02-Nov-13 13:58:05

Yanbu im an average build but i can lug furniture with the best if them and it kinda gets my goat that men used to say in my old job when there was only me and another male staff that its ok theyll lift the furniture with them.erm well if you can manage why did you get them to get me in the first place?i also get inwardly mad when petfectly healthy women that i know are healthy and able pretend they are too fragile to pick up a bloody cardboard box.jeez woman.

leezl Sat 02-Nov-13 14:18:23

I volunteer in a charity shop and one of the other volunteers (an older lady, retired) told me I'd "ruin my womb" by lugging around heavy bags of donations. I've never heard that before, but I assume she means I'll get a hernia?! If you're lifting and carrying things sensibly though, I don't see why women would be at any more risk than men. YANBU (wow my first time saying that, haha!)

TrucksAndDinosaurs Sat 02-Nov-13 14:40:45

I went to pick up a 50lb chest from an eBay seller: the man made a huge song and dance about bringing it downstairs while his wife cooed at his muscles. While he went off to get himself water I picked it up and put it in my car boot. It was easier than putting a wriggling 35lb child into a car seat tbh but you would have thought I was some kind of freak the way they both stood there agog.

It irritates me when it's assumed women can't lift heavy things. Anyone with a preschooler or toddler spends a good part of their day squatting, dead lifting and lunging!

oh god yes, the times I have lugged armfuls of carrier bags full of shopping down the million may be exaggerating slightly steps to the house when DH does it its two at a time and lots of huffing and sighing. I am a strong strapping lass grin

slightlygoostained Sat 02-Nov-13 15:25:11

Problem is that it does mean women don't get a look in on jobs they're more than capable of doing.

Agreed it's annoying. I always try to volunteer for carrying stuff (and I actually am a wimpy scrawny thing) - to the point where our office manager had to remind me I shouldn't be trying to lift heavy stuff when pregnant.

MurderOfGoths Sat 02-Nov-13 15:30:33

YANBU, I always used to do all the heavy lifting when I worked in retail, used to get quite annoyed when men (and it was always men) told me I shouldn't. Especially if the fuckers tried to take over and couldn't carry as much as me. hmm

MurderOfGoths Sat 02-Nov-13 15:31:59

I have been known to ask if they lift things with their penis, because if not I am perfectly capable of doing the same as them.

ParsingFancy Sat 02-Nov-13 15:38:00

YABU. Don't you know that furniture actually weighs something, whereas children of any age and child equipment are merely female bodily parts?

Cf "hard work" and "stuff women do".

ScarletLady02 Sat 02-Nov-13 15:45:38

This sort of thing makes me laugh...

Also you should SEE DH trying to put together flat pack furniture...sans instructions of course...I mean obviously a man is born with the innate ability to just KNOW how a chest of drawers goes together perfectly...they won't EVER put the drawer runners on back to front so all the drawers are upside down and then smash said chest of drawers to pieces with a hammer

I love putting furniture's a breeze when you follow the instructions grin

Dobbiesmum Sat 02-Nov-13 15:49:26

MoG that is brilliant! grin
Try being up a ladder while DH holds the bottom for me while I climb onto the garage roof... In all fairness I'm not that great at the job we needed to do but he's too heavy to sit on it so I had to do it. A good learning experience for me but he got loads of stick for it off the neighbours..

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Sat 02-Nov-13 15:52:10

Funnily enough, none of those men are ever around when you're carrying a toddler in a buggy full of shopping down the stairs on the tube.


littlewhitebag Sat 02-Nov-13 16:25:31

My DD and i carried a sofa bed up a two flights of stairs in a tenement. It was a struggle but we were not going to be beaten by a sofa bed and we certainly were not going to ask for help.

LaurieFairyCake Sat 02-Nov-13 16:27:15

I feel you

Yesterday we were moving the contents of our garage

The bloke across the road found this fascinating and stared at me for over an hour hmm

Dawndonnaagain Sat 02-Nov-13 16:28:07

What do the men think female nurses do, every bloomin' day!

complexnumber Sat 02-Nov-13 16:45:08

Having lived in various part of Africa for lots of years, there is no doubt in my mind as to how strong women can be.

I can't remember why, but I had an arm wrestling contest with Nelisiwe (a woman who worked for me a long time ago)

She destroyed me! I think she was embarrassed at how easily she beat me.

YoniTime Sat 02-Nov-13 17:03:59

Funnily enough, none of those men are ever around when you're carrying a toddler in a buggy full of shopping down the stairs on the tube.

Exactly, why is carrying furniture seen as different?

ScaryNutellaFangs Sat 02-Nov-13 18:24:52

I often carry huge heavy boxes on my shoulder. I put it down at the till and then it's great fun watching these blokes who I have heard say "It can't be that heavy if she's carrying it", and then they struggle to lift it to carry it out of the store.

It's always gratifying for me.

AndyMurraysBalls Sat 02-Nov-13 18:32:58

It chafes my chuff when people assume all women are wimps.

TooOldForGlitter Sat 02-Nov-13 18:36:40

My Mum, although lovely, is like this. I wouldn't say i'm very strong but I carried all our bedroom furniture up and down stairs when we moved and got the two seater sofa out to the van on my own. Apparently my DM tells me this means i'm not very feminine and 'men don't like women like that'. Hmm.

southeastastra Sat 02-Nov-13 18:37:59

i hate the assumption that women aren't capable too, happens at work alot, 'get a man to help shift this etc' really irks me.

i was once paining the outside porch when a delivery bloke told me how great it was to see a woman painting during the day and not doing her nails confused

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