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AIBU?

To not want to get up in the morning.

12 replies

YorksDame · 23/10/2013 07:17

NC'D as frankly my username before was boring me.

I detest my job with a passion. The team I manage individually manage to piss me off every day. My boss is racist, prioritizing jobs to people of his nationality over others even if the others are better qualified. We got a 1% payrise this year as a "good will gesture" it was our first in 3 years as "times have been hard". We took a 10% pay cut for 2 months last year to "save the company" yet our MD had the gall to buy a company the week before that happened but he said it was his own money. An MD only gets money from a company making a profit so mixed signals there.

There's a new operations manager who makes my skin crawl whose job seems to be to antagonize us all. Oh and a couple of weeks after the 1% they brought back someone who left the company as a middle manager in between myself and my boss without advertising the role. He does nothing at all and is only back on more money than me as he kisses the MD's arse.

I layed in bed crying this morning not wanting to come to this vile place, just hold onto my DH and cry. I was going to have a day sorting out job applications (which I am well on with but no luck). But I realised that if I did I would lose over £100 doing so through a days wages and if you have a day off you lose a % of a monthly and a Christmas bonus and I need the money so felt trapped.

DH is worried about me and is so supportive and I can see how worried he is and feel guilty for that too. I've just arrived now and feel so trapped.

How have I stayed here 10 years?

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starsandunicorns · 23/10/2013 07:25

Didnt want to leave you unanwsered having been in a place of work that stressed me out like this I really feel for you my dp too was supportive saying just leave we manage I stopped when I got very ill no job is worth getting ill with your doing job apps which is got take one hour at a time if need be or break the day up to each break you have hope you get somewhere new soon

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Beaverfeaver · 23/10/2013 07:27

I feel for you.

Your post could almost be me.

I also don't know why I had put up with it so long.

I am no leaving. And very happy.

Get out of there! You will find something far better and it will be good for you.

Good luck

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starsandunicorns · 23/10/2013 07:28

Plus have a talk with dp about the money if you can feed your family and pay the bills leave even if it means christmas is on a shoe string and you dont get as many treats you dh will wamt you to be happy

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DorisShuttAgainstGhosts · 23/10/2013 07:38

Been there. Done that. Got out.

It takes determination and lots of hunting and applying, but you can do it. View each day as one day nearer to your resignation and play boss bingo - yell bingo internally when he does x,y or z that you expect.

And don't stop applying!

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Jinty64 · 23/10/2013 07:40

Are you me? I am in a similar position to you but their are members of my team that I likes and get on with. If it wasn't for them I would have gone under long ago.

You need to sit down with your dh and see if their are things you can cut back on and work out exactly what you have to earn to survive. Keep on with the application forms but think about whether you could do anything else, earning less money at least in the meantime.

I am leaving my job next year (I have a date decided) whether I have anything else or not. We will manage. It will be difficult and I hate to think of the children going without, but my health is suffering and I am more important to them that toys, holidays and fancy clothes.

Another thought, would you get some benefits at least to tide you over until you found something else?

I wish you all the best, it's a horrible situation to be in.

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YorksDame · 23/10/2013 07:56

Not working isn't an option as DH is self employed which brings its own pressures and we don't have a DS or a DD in our life yet.

Christmas has to be a special one this year as it will be our last one with a close family member due to illness so cutting back isn't an option plus I've promised DH a present that is expensive (stupid I know) but I've let him down so many times I need to do this for him and for me. I worked out that.

we're also clearing all of our debts so we can be debt free and ready to hopefully bring a little one into the world in about 18 months so can't slow down at all.

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OhYouWickedWickedWitch · 23/10/2013 08:00

You can slow down if you make different choices. It's about regaining control over your own life.
money won't make it a special christmas, neither will an expensive present. If you don't slow down you may find it extra hard to time a baby - nature has a way of putting things off while people are stressed.

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Stealmysunshine · 23/10/2013 08:22

This was me!

Hated my job with a passion and my 2 hour commute each way made me the most miserable person Monday to Friday.

Over a one year period, I applied for 100's if jobs, I'd have an app and I'd apply all day everyday, out of all of those I had about 10 unsuccesful interviews and finally one successful one.

Keep applying for jobs, it is so tough out there but you WILL find another job that's a million times better.

Life's too short to be so miserable