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To hate it when people say that I am quiet?

(51 Posts)
silverphotoframe Sat 19-Oct-13 21:35:40

I am naturally quite a quiet/shy type of person. When I am around people I know well or people that I just feel comfortable with, I feel confident, and comfortable in my own skin. But mostly, if I am around people I don't know or am not too sure about I tend to keep to myself. I consider myself to have reasonably good social skills however, I ask about the other person and don't ignore people etc. But every now and again someone will point out that I am really quiet. They'll say something like "why are you so quiet" and this always makes me feel so bad, I take it personally like a criticism. It is usually said by someone who is quite loud and brash and it feels like they have picked up on my nervousness or something and that they are using it against me to make me look stupid in front of other people.

One particular instance of this happened at a work do, I had been chatting happily with my colleagues during the evening and had felt reasonably relaxed. There is a guy at work who is very loud and domineering. Has something to say about everyone, thinks he is important, patronises everyone etc. All of a sudden he starts with "ooh, silver is so quiet, why are you so quiet?, I've worked here for x years and I have never had a conversation with her" blah blah. I was sat right next to him while he addressed this to the whole table. I just felt so undermined. I had actually spoken to him as at one point we worked in quite a small team together. I appreciate that I can be quiet sometimes, but AIBU to take this as an insult and be really annoyed by it. Do other "quiet types" also find it massively irritated to have it pointed out? Is it actually rude or AIBU? Also does anyone have any good replies/comebacks?

HootyMcOwlface Sun 20-Oct-13 12:40:33

I'm quiet and I utterly hate people who point it out loudly in a group situation.
I always feel like they're trying to make you look stupid, whilst bigging up how great they are.. Grrr!

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