using a nursery for 5 month old(129 Posts)
Hi, my first baby is due in March. Unfortunately, due to redundancy and a big hit on our savings (but didn't want to wait to TTC due to my age) I'm not going to be able to afford a lot of time off for maternity leave and will be looking to go back to work in September when the baby will be 5 months.
I have looked around a lovely nursery (rated outstanding) and had more or less decided to put the baby there but have been open to criticism, some of it direct ("I couldn't do that!" with teeth-sucking) and some less explicit, just head-shaking and tut-tuts.
It's really upsetting and I wondered if anyone had any 'comebacks' as I know Mumsnet is good for these!
My children were in childcare from around 12 weeks old ( as others have said it was totally the norm a few years back.) We did start with a cm, and then progressed to nursery (then the lovely cm again later for before/ after school care)
My two have many happy memories of nursery. As long as you look at your childcare options carefully and know what you want ( in our case we were very pro child- led provision) and ensure your child is secure, stimulated and content, then what's the problem?
My children are teenagers now and totally normal, secure, loving kids.
You're best off growing a thick skin because I'm afraid there are always some naysayers who will delight in darkly hinting at why they don't think you should do it... Just ignore ignore ignore! And remember the people who are secure in their own choices wont have a problem with yours
Everyone has said this but I don't think the point can bé stated too much - down with the tutters!
DS went to nursery at 6 months, is now almost 2.8. They doted on him, he has friends, security and since he moved to the big room has transitioned from playtime 100percent to a more learning-type environment. He still adores and has a very very close relationship with us, and I have absolutely no worries about his transition to school.
Would I have loved more time with him? Yes. But he is an indie little person and very active with a constant need for stimulation. Nursery gives him that (or. made him that?!) And I genuinely believe for some babies can bé a really positive place rather than a second best.
With any setting where a vulnerable young person ie under 5 ish in this case is being looked after by a nursery or child minder, the only thing you can do to see if they are being looked after and happy, for everyone is to simply call in un announced on occasion...but enough times to check with your own eyes, is my child happy, look through the door, window, are they being engaged with, are they playing? Any CM any nursery, can if not openly abuse your child, still may ignore them!
I think everyone with children in a nursery or CM setting just once, call in, on the spur of the moment just to make sure with your own eyes everything is fine. Thats all we can do really.
Totally overqualified CM here and I think a good nursery/nanny/CM will be fine for a 5 month old and they should skip the whole separation anxiety that some older children go through. Good luck OP. It will all be fine.
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