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AIBU to just not go?

(28 Posts)
sulkymonkey Sat 12-Oct-13 22:11:18

I have 2 sisters. DS1 is pregnant and due any day pretty much. DS2 messaged me on Monday to ask if I was free for a baby shower for DS1. I said I could be.

The reason I had not organised anything is that I am not a fan. I just don't "get" them. I see DS1 all the time, I congratulated her and her OH on their pregnancy, I help with practical things like helping with her DC or taking her to hospital appts when her OH can't, when baby is born I will no doubt buy a gift for him.. whats the point of a party for her now? to which we are expected to bring a gift? what is it FOR?!

Anyway I didn't say any of this, just figured that if DS2 wanted to organise it (it being us meeting in the pub for a drink and cake) then I would go along and be supportive etc.

Anyway fast forward to tonight and I message DS2 to ask if she wants me to pick anything up on the way. message from DS2 to ask if I can go halves on the cake and should she make a game. I said ok to going halves unless she would rather I grab some balloons? and yes I guess if she wants to make a game then she could, I would but am busy working. She said she was busy too, she already had balloons and can I bring the money tomorrow for when the woman drops off the cake. I said "suppose so".

She then started saying I was making out that she was putting me out by not just saying yes to giving her money tomorrow (seriously I know you cannot read tone in a message but I JUST said suppose so as in I have no cash, will have to pick it up on the way.. not suppose so as in eughh its so unfair?)

She then said that I could sod off with my snotty attitude and she couldn't see anyone else getting off their arse to organise anything (again, her idea and didn't ask me for any help until today and even then it was just money). I basically said wtf was her problem? and if she didn't want me to be there then I wouldn't be. She said don't go then. I said suit yourself.

Sooo AIBU?

BrandybuckCurdlesnoot Sun 13-Oct-13 18:03:39

I can kind of see where everyone is coming from on the "suppose so" front ... but am I the only person who thinks the sister was being unreasonable asking her to go halves on a cake for a shower she had thought up and arranged herself? That put the OP in a very difficult spot and why should she be expected to go halves on, what could possibly be, a very expensive baby shower cake?

You were being U OP by not communicating your actual thoughts to your sister about the whole thing but I think she was unreasonable to ask for money for the cake. If she wanted you to go halves, you should have both had input on picking it.

CocacolaMum Sun 13-Oct-13 21:20:11

see that was what I thought Brandy. I would be pretty irritated if my sister decided to throw a baby shower and then sent me a message to ask for half the money for something which was ordered without any input from me? one thing to ask before but afterwards? and then to get shirty when OP wasn't gleeful about it?

Pigsmummy Sun 13-Oct-13 22:45:43

To expect someone to respond happily to "I suppose so" YABU

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