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most pointless lyrics ever?

(58 Posts)
IWishYouWould Thu 10-Oct-13 16:40:13

'Lucky my breast are small and humble, so you don't confuse them with mountains'

What were they smoking when they wrote that one?smile

Anyone got anything worse?

GhostsInSnow Fri 11-Oct-13 12:22:39

I give you...Roger Miller.

"Oh My Uncle used to love me but she died
A chicken aint chicken till its lickin' good fried
Keep on the sunny side
My Uncle used to love me but she died"

Then again this was from the bloke who wrote 'England swings like a pendulum do' so its none too surprising.

Toadinthehole Fri 11-Oct-13 11:56:45

Anything by Oasis.

A prime example of trying to be profound just by being obscure.

Impomea Fri 11-Oct-13 11:53:15

Bohemian Rhapsody but it's brilliant and written by a genius.

KatoPotato Fri 11-Oct-13 11:45:36

Near a tree by a river
There's a hole in the ground
Where an old man of Aran
Goes around and around...

So many people went to town trying to work our the meaning of this, for Good Ol Nik to admit it was "In short, 'The Riddle' is nonsense, rubbish, bollocks, the confused ramblings of an 80's popstar."

CoolItKittens Fri 11-Oct-13 11:42:01

I love the Lumineers, but 'If you just relax, and check your eyes for cataracts'...really?

TheOneWithTheHair Fri 11-Oct-13 10:59:59

No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no lyrics limits.

Can't remember who it's by.

elcranko Fri 11-Oct-13 10:40:24

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... YEAH"
(Usher, song called 'yeah' funnily enough)

"Peaches come from a can, they were put there by a man" (Presidents of the United States - Peaches) In fact, the entire song is pretty pointless! Catchy though grin

Thewhingingdefective Fri 11-Oct-13 10:19:07

'Giant steps are what you take...walking on the moon.'


MrsCosmopilite Fri 11-Oct-13 10:01:34

"Tank fly boss walk jam nitty-gritty, / You're listening to the boy from the big bad city, / This is jam hot."


"Pump up the jamp, ump it up / While your feet are stompin' / And the jam is pumpin'"
(or as my late mother used to quote, 'Boil up the jam..')

Fakebook Fri 11-Oct-13 09:55:48

Why does it always rain on me? Is it because I lied when I was seventeen? confused

Hi My name Eminem has the most pointless lyrics. I know it off by heart (shameful fan when I was about 17/18!).

samu2 Fri 11-Oct-13 09:33:28



A mole, living in a hole
Digging up my soul
Going down, excavation

perplexedpirate Fri 11-Oct-13 09:30:35

Ah! Let's not start on Flight of the Conchords, we'll be here all day!
'You know when I'm down to my socks it's time for business, that's why they call them business socks-mmmm!'.
I lurve The Conchords. grin

Badgerwife Fri 11-Oct-13 09:24:02

When I was a teenager, I would practice English by listening to the radio (in France). I would try to write the words down so I could sing the songs properly. The lyrics made no sense and I thought it was my fault for not hearing the words right!

Now the most fun I get to have when I go back there is to hear all English songs uncensored, since no ones has a clue what the words are. Maroon 5 'Payphone' was a bit shock at 9 am. You can't argue with him though, he's quite right:

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
All those fairy tales are full of shit
One more fucking love song, I'll be sick.
Now I'm at a payphone

noddingoff Fri 11-Oct-13 09:21:38

Not pointless, but amusing:
practically all of Goldie Lookin' Chain's lyrics
and Flight of the Concords' "I'm the Hiphopapotamus, my lyrics are bottomless..............<silence>..........."

MrsToddsShortcut Fri 11-Oct-13 09:11:29

Belouis Some, Imagination

"She smoked a cigarette, both hands behind her back..."


Pos1 Fri 11-Oct-13 09:10:57

How about - hot dog, jumping frog, Alberquque? I don't even understand how those three things can be remotely connected. Unless its an address in the back waters of Alberquque (I also have no idea how to spell 'Alberquerque')

SamanthaHD Fri 11-Oct-13 08:41:25

Pretty much anything by Duran Duran. Like this....

'I see the delta traces living lonely out on the limb
And a passing glimmer warm beneath your skin
Please tread gently on the ground when all around you earth turns to fire
Only get a second chance when danger's on the wind

Because you're lonely in your nightmare let me in
Because there's heat beneath your winter let me in

Must be lucky whether when you find the kind of wind that you need
Come on show me all the light and shade that made your name
I know you've got it in your head I've seen that look before
You've built your refuge turns you captive all the same'


Longdistance Fri 11-Oct-13 07:48:09

I still think Alanis Morrisette.

There's a black your Chardonnay, it's a death row pardon...two minutes too late.

That song always cracks me up. It's even more ironic that I used to sing this song in the car on my way to work.

Babylonmoo Fri 11-Oct-13 07:39:38

James Blunt- "those three wise men they've got a semi by the sea"


Faith48 Fri 11-Oct-13 07:35:01

You a stupid Hoe, you a, you a stupid Hoe.

- Nicki minaj.


urtwistingmymelonman Fri 11-Oct-13 06:07:29

I am the walrus.
goo goo gajoo.
the world is just a great big onion.
I crashed my car into a bridge AND I DONT CARE.

no.neither do we.

Thumbwitch Fri 11-Oct-13 05:37:29

From "Always the last to know" by Del'Amitri:
"And you said these are such perfect days
that if the bomb drops baby, I wanna be the last to know"

Why? Why stick the bomb thing in there? Absolutely NOTHING else they could have used instead? No?

Fools. Sticks in my craw every time I hear it. angry

sleepywombat Fri 11-Oct-13 05:31:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

daisychain01 Fri 11-Oct-13 05:15:54

This theme has been done before, but thanks because I can again vent about the crap lyrics to Life by whoever the stupid bint is who sings it.

You know, its the one about seeing a ghost and rather eating a bit of toast and staying in and watching TV

Utter, utter bollox

OrchidLass Fri 11-Oct-13 03:11:24

Abra abra cadabra I'm gonna reach out and grab ya.

Piss off, creepy fucker.

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