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To feel a bit crappy over a flamin' photo

(41 Posts)
junobaby74 Thu 26-Sep-13 11:58:27

Please be gentle with me as this is one of my first but I just wanted to ask the opinion of all you lovely ladies out there about something that has just happened.

So my mum came round with a photo album of loads of family pictures from this year, including our summer hols and they are lovely, happy people, beautiful scenery but......I look totally awful on every single one I'm in. Fat and old. I actually thought I was looking all right at the moment but after seeing those pictures I'm thinking "what the hell"? It doesn't help that sister and sil's all looked good on them either - tanned and slim (God I sound so jealous). Am I being a vain and shallow twit or has anyone else ever felt a mite down after viewing picture after picture of themselves looking nothing like they imagined they did?

Please be nice. I have a couple of nights out planned over next few days and am seriously thinking about putting paper bag over head eek!

DontPanicMrMannering Thu 26-Sep-13 12:00:33

Nope I hate photos too think you look good turns out you look like a troll. Yanbu

BlueJess Thu 26-Sep-13 12:01:33

Bad photos can be awful. Nothing worse than someone with a camera when you are on a beach or wearing shorts!

Can you use it as a springboard to make somed changes? Eat better, more sleep, do more exercise? Take a poditive from the negative.

CoffeeTea103 Thu 26-Sep-13 12:02:23

Don't feel too bad we all have photos like these at some point. You never know someone might be next to you, looking at you and feel that way�� enjoy your nights out.

adagio Thu 26-Sep-13 12:05:09

Ahh bless you don't feel down sad

Have you something with a forward facing camera (phone, pad or whatever?) as I found that standing at certain angles/holding my chin a certain way can make me look one hell of a lot worse. Get dolled up (make sure you are on your own!) and practice, hopefully will make you feel a lot better!

(Only did this experiment after sight of some atrocious photos I caught sight of)

LegoStillSavesMyLife Thu 26-Sep-13 12:05:23

If it's any help. Someone should me a picture at Easter of me that they thought was nice. I was so horrified I have now lost two stone and am considerably fitter.

adagio Thu 26-Sep-13 12:05:43

oh and do remember no one ever actually looks closely at other people! Too preoccupied with their own hang ups...

junobaby74 Thu 26-Sep-13 12:30:01

Aww thanks everyone. I was terrified to post in case I sounded like a vain, self-obsessed cow but you've been lovely thank you. Yes the pictures, or a lot of them, were taken from underneath (never a good angle) and I was having a picnic at the time. And yes I do need to get more sleep and loose a bit of weight etc. I've finally managed to persuade my daughter to come for a jog/walk with me tonight so that might help. Also I know really that other people won't even notice how I look as they are so busy focusing on themselves but it was just a bit of a shock and a rubbish one at that. However feel a bit better now so thanks xxx.

DoJo Thu 26-Sep-13 12:53:03

People mostly look only at themselves when they look at photos, so try not to take it too much to heart. Also bear in mind that you would have only looked like that and been in that particular position for that second. I am horribly unphotogenic and whilst I accept it, I always find it hard when people say I'm not as it makes me think 'Do I just look like that all the time then?' which is truly depressing! I know it doesn't work for everyone, but perhaps you could keep the photo on your fridge or snack cupboard to motivate you if you decide to make some dietary changes.

MalcolmTuckersMistress Thu 26-Sep-13 12:53:19

I hate myself in photos. Some people are naturally photogenic some aren't. It doesn't mean you are in real life! Also remember that you are always going to be your biggest critic.

Jellybeanz1 Thu 26-Sep-13 13:08:07

I don't understand where those hideous photos come from. And then someone says, 'here's a good one of you.' Arrragh. I only have mirrors above waist height, avoid public changing rooms and feel that I may not have updated my outward 'model' of myself for 20 years. Still that's the majority of the time as opposed to the reality check bad photo, which will end up deleted.

LaRegina Thu 26-Sep-13 13:14:37

Ha ha I have a little experiment for anybody who thought they look good in photos and can get hold of a 3ds.... like me sad

Get somebody to take your pic on the 3ds so it can magically create a 'mini me' if you - ie a cartoon version of your face - ooh what fun hmm.

DS1 kindly 'did' me, after doing the rest of the family. Everybody else looked cute/funny/quite like they actually look. My 'me' mysteriously had huge bags under her eyes and such big hoods over them you could hardly see the eyes at all shock

Arabesque Thu 26-Sep-13 13:23:54

Everyone is over critical of themselves in photographs. Your sister and sister in law are probably saying 'oh Juno looks great and I look really haggard' etc. We notice our own flaws much quicker than we notice other people's.

havingamadmoment Thu 26-Sep-13 14:41:17

I had to get a new driving licence and went to get a photo. When it came out I couldnt believe the hideously ugly, tired, round face staring back at me. I even went to a different place because i was convinced that wasnt what I looked was.

I wouldnt say I was upset, I AM happy but it did shake me a little!

tothesea Thu 26-Sep-13 14:52:04

Oh lordy! DP took a photo of me throwing DS2 up in the air..I thought it would be a fab photo as my hair was looking ok for once and I had some slap on..but no, in the act of throwing him up meant that my jowl was on its way down so I had this horrendous lump on my depressing.
So yes I would agree angles are important! Also I try not to look directly at the camera as it makes me blink...another good gormless look. In fact I tend to stay out of photos these days...

ICameOnTheJitney Thu 26-Sep-13 15:02:40

I used to look lovely on ALL pics. Since turning 40 I look horrendous! However....I won't not have them 20 MORE years I will be saying "What was I thinking! I looked great!!"

Pawprint Thu 26-Sep-13 15:51:38

I have cringed at some pics of me when I thought I looked nice but definitely didn't.

Don't be too hard on yourself.

ExitPursuedByADragon Thu 26-Sep-13 15:54:09

I do everything in my power not to appear in any photos.

It is sad really as there are so few photos of us as a family. Thousands of DD, but when she looks back when we are dead and gone she will wonder if we ever existed sad

ExitPursuedByADragon Thu 26-Sep-13 15:54:35

Until she looks in the mirror wink

WilsonFrickett Thu 26-Sep-13 15:57:36

Oh god don't start me on the jowls tothesea.

I remember being fascinated by my GGM's jowls when I was tiny. And here they are, a pair of my own to play with. Yay! sad

Chocolatehunter Thu 26-Sep-13 15:58:41

Count yourself lucky. This week I had my wedding photographs back and I hate every single one of me. I thought I looked nice and don't remember seeing huge eye bags, plus I'm not overweight so don't really have a double chin, yet every photo is eye bag and double chin central. I feel really vain not to like our wedding photos but I wanted at least one day in my life where I could look at photos of myself and think I looked lovely.

GoEasyPudding Thu 26-Sep-13 17:16:54

I know how you feel.
A whole summer of bad photos has sent me running to weight watchers.

The ones my DS took were the most honest as he doesn't know the unofficial rules about taking snaps of me which are, no legs, no tum and have the camera on multi shot so out of 20 frames there will be one that will pass my critical eye.

ExitDragons, you must allow photos of yourself to be taken because yes, your DD will want memories of you in photo form - so don't miss out.

Another mumsnetter posted this link recently about this issue. Mommy Stays in the Picture. It's about the importance of having pictures taken with the kids, no matter what.


dirtyface Thu 26-Sep-13 17:19:56

aww op i am the same

in pics i either look WAY better than i think i do in rl or WAY worse

more often worse

junobaby74 Thu 26-Sep-13 17:23:35

Poor you chocolate, that is the one day in your life when you do want to look drop dead gorg.

I know I'm probably being over critical. I showed them to daughter before and she said it's just the angle, before then going on to say 'it's not your body that makes you look fat it's your face, look you have about three chins'. Thanks darling for the kind, supportive words. Very glad to know that it's not just me who has really started hating seeing pictures of myself. Sounds like I'm not alone!

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 26-Sep-13 17:33:18

I feel quite/very happy with how I look (even in the mirror) until I see pictures of myself. It's worst when someone says "That's a nice photo" or "That one is a really good likeness" because that brings home that I really look like that.

So, since self-esteem is all in the mind I like to kid mine. Don't have photos taken. Simple!

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