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To think people don't seem to recognise the difference between evening wear and wedding clothes any more ?

(247 Posts)
BetsyBidwell Sun 22-Sep-13 08:24:47

(Disclaimer yes it doesn't matter compared to Syria , I do get out a lot, yes the bride and groom were lovely , etc etc)

Day wedding yesterday. Just too much tit. Too much bare top halves. Shiny cocktail dresses in a country church.

Just too much.

PixieBumbles Mon 23-Sep-13 17:15:57

I have to confess I wore a strapless dress for my wedding. I was adamant I didn't want strapless but the lady at the sale insisted I try it on and I loved it. I wore it with a fake fur bolero because it was March and bloody cold!

I have a guest dress dilemma coming up. I have a selection of (I hope) smart day dresses that I tend to rotate through different weddings. The problems I have are:

1. I've already worn all the dresses to other weddings with the same group of friends and I don't really want to turn up in a dress they've all seen me in before.

2. I'll be 14 weeks pregnant so while I don't expect to have much of a bump by then I have no idea if any of my current dresses will actually fit.

Think I'll try to find something nice with an empire line, so it has growing room over the tummy!

Vintageclock Mon 23-Sep-13 16:09:16

YANBU. And I don't know which is worse with short dresses - pale white hefty legs; or streaky fake tanned, lots of bits missed, hefty legs.

The most elegant and attractive looking people at weddings are always the ones who go for a classy toned down look; not the ones teetering around in stilettos with dresses clinging to their hips and bare shoulders turning blue with the cold.

TiredDog Mon 23-Sep-13 15:58:11

My big fat gypsy wedding...

TheWomanTheyCallJayne Mon 23-Sep-13 07:59:32

If the groom wants both legs and top halves out that's his call.
He'll look ridiculous and still get judged though

ICameOnTheJitney Mon 23-Sep-13 07:30:31

It is not the bride's is also her husband's....and if he likes fat arses revealed up to the hilt then he should have them.grin

sashh Mon 23-Sep-13 07:27:37

(Women should be able to wear what they like and be proud of their bodies sort of thing)

Everywhere except weddings, it is the bride's day, she is the only one who should be showing off her figure/covering it up/whatever she wants.

Anyone who distracts from the bride is not appropriately dressed (caveat - small children can do this but only for short periods of time)

InsertBoringName Mon 23-Sep-13 07:26:51

turnipsoup That dress is gorgeous!

Lweji Mon 23-Sep-13 07:08:57

Coming late to the thread, but last year my 7 year old got baptised during service along with other children and teenagers.
Some of the outfits worn by the girls being baptised were hmm, including strapless...

sonlypuppyfat Mon 23-Sep-13 06:42:19

I see loads of weddings I'm a church bellringer and none of them know how to dress and none of them sing either. And don't start me on the bride I think there is only one strapless dress in the whole county and they all share it.

Crowler Mon 23-Sep-13 06:35:49

It's bad enough seeing these young girls in their skimpy attire. Worse yet to see them 1. unable to actually walk in their heels and 2. tugging at their dress all night because for all their bravado, they remain biologically programmed to feel awkward at being nearly naked in public.

turnipsoup Mon 23-Sep-13 04:34:42

Oh, and I'm size 12, 5'6" with chunky legs smile

turnipsoup Mon 23-Sep-13 04:33:04

sorry, should have said it's the 'mink' one on the right hand side

turnipsoup Mon 23-Sep-13 04:32:11

So can I wear this dress to an autumn day wedding followed by reception? And if so what should I wear with it?

Mimishimi Mon 23-Sep-13 04:00:34

I remember showing up to a wedding in New York in what I thought was a lovely floral cotton dress and a hat. Everyone else was in black-tie evening wear at 2pm in the afternoon. Of course I looked the odd one out and felt horribly self-conscious for about half an hour. The invitation had not specified and it turns out that Americans (in that city at least) have a very different idea of what is appropriate to wear to a morning/afternoon wedding (i.e ballgowns).

I think they meant they were in the "No, just No" category, rather than tips for the perfect outfit grin

raisah Sun 22-Sep-13 22:34:29

I don't know what to say, I did google aintree grand national ladies as someone advised earlier & this is what I got.

You will need brain bleach for some of the images & they all looked frozen.

fluffyraggies Sun 22-Sep-13 18:33:17

I can understand the want to look glam when you're going out. But there are rules to help.

If you've got a big bust and/or an hour glass figure it can be hard to strike that balance between tarty (Jessica Rabbit) and matronly.

A big bust needs a v neck or lowish round neck to be flattering. I hate having a massive expanse of fabric under my chin, over my big boobs. It looks awful.

For my shape anything that doesn't fit me at the ribs and instead drops from the bust just makes my bust look even bigger and makes me look 9 months gone and like i'm wearing a tent sad Ditto all the floaty chiffon gipsy tops sadly.

So ... I tend to pay attention to the 'one or the other' rule, ie: Legs or bust - never both out at the same time.

ie: flash a bit of cleavage, but have the length at least to the knee. OR have your legs on show but put a scarf or higher neck line over the boobs.

EastwickWitch Sun 22-Sep-13 17:48:23

My (now ex) SIL arrived at the house before my wedding in a very short, strapless cotton frock, with her very large unsupported cleavage on show.
DM kept saying "the church is very, very cold, would you like to borrow a cardigan".
She declined, cue lots of sniggering in the pews from friends & looks of disapproval from DP family. I heard that the choir rather enjoyed the outfit.

Don't entirely agree about the spanx OP, it depends totally on the outfit and on your shape. But then I don't wear them to make me a size smaller or anything, just to smooth things out a bit on dresses that suit my body shape, but not my post baby tummy! Many dresses look better (on me) for the addition of some spanx but I'm very hourglass so don't get overstuffed sausage skin look, or overspill from them.

However I have seen plenty of women in bad control pants where you can clearly see where they start and finish!

AlwaysSleepingBeauty Sun 22-Sep-13 17:18:40

I am 25 and attended a wedding last week in a peachy maxi skirt and nude peach lace top (worn together looks like a dress) with vintage jewellery and a faux fur cropped jacket for the church and colder evening part.

Lots of girls wore short bodycon dresses, it made me wonder if I should have gone for something more 'sexy', but this thread is making me think perhaps I was correct smile

SconeRhymesWithGone Sun 22-Sep-13 16:57:33

Americans wear evening dress for weddings.

This is generally true, but in my experience, it is much more common in the States for weddings to be in the late afternoon or night than in the UK. Where I live in the South, weddings are usually at night (a holdover from the days of no AC, perhaps) or very late afternoon, which makes the reception a nightime event. So people dress for the evening.

Also we don't have the bifurcated wedding celebration with some events happening in the daytime and another party at night.

BTW, I am also not a fan of strapless wedding dresses, mainly because often the proportions are way off; with not much to vary on top from dress to dress, designers tend to focus on the skirt and train, etc. with sometimes unfortunate furbelows and embellishments.

SparkyTGD Sun 22-Sep-13 16:43:02


I was at wedding in the summer & googled 'wedding guest dress etiquette' beforehand (saddo grin) and its definitely bad form for female guests to display too much flesh.

I'm tempted to get that green dress even without a wedding to go to! grin

LtEveDallas Sun 22-Sep-13 16:32:37

Oh I love that green dress Jayne. I normally go for sleeves, but that one is nice.

I hadn't noticed that about her belly on the scuba dress blush. I actually thought it made her look more hourglass. I wonder what it looks like side on? Probably not good.

Think I'm going to stick to my floaty dresses, just fancied a change for once. Mind you, at a size 14 it's not like I'm going to persuade anyone I'm thin is it grin

DuckToWater Sun 22-Sep-13 16:32:27

At all the weddings I've been to I thought it was lovely to see people looking so smart.

I think people should wear what THEY feel comfortable in, and can afford. Most people can't afford new clothes for a wedding at the moment. I don't really see why anyone should care that much about what others wear, or need to start a thread on it.

Oh and I spent years getting confident enough to show my legs after being called thunderthighs at school. I spent a couple of years dieting and exercising obsessively and went down to a stone underweight, and guess what, I still had muscly legs. The only way I wouldn't have sturdy legs is to have some kind of muscle-wasting disorder, and fortunately I didn't go that far. I started to actually like my legs after Beyonce became popular and then Serena Williams in tennis, and actually when I do show them I often get compliments.

That's not to say I'd wear something arse-skimming with massive stilettos for a wedding. It's not my style, and I can't bear heels more than about 3" for more than a few minutes at a time, and I'm tall anyway so don't need them. My mum might have in the 1960s though - she used to have knickers to match her skirt, just in case. But if other people want to that's their choice. I might be guilty of wearing a short skirt with sturdy legs though, and things that are non-traditional for a wedding, like cream and black.

I'm afraid this thread reads largely like a) the tyranny of the thin (even if contributors aren't themselves thin) and b) rather Hyacinth Bouquet in tone.

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