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To feel like a lazy cow because I have a cleaner?

(25 Posts)
GladitsnotJustMe Thu 19-Sep-13 15:39:58

DH runs his own business employing several staff.

There currently isn't enough work on for one of his admin staff, but he doesn't want to lose her, and doesn't want to drop her hours (she needs the money), so has asked her to come and clean our house one day a week. She is happy with this.

However, I told him I'd feel like a lazy bastard if we had a cleaner as I really ought to be doing it myself. I work full time, but have no DCs and work from home and have an easy job, so I do have it easy. He works incredibly hard.

However, we both find it difficult to keep up with the cleaning, as it's a big house and frankly we we prefer to spend the one day a week we have off together doing fun stuff, not cleaning the house.

She's coming tomorrow - I'm going to spend the evening tidying and cleaning so I'm not too ashamed!

AIBU to feel guilty about having a cleaner??

MrsShortfuse Thu 19-Sep-13 15:48:19

Yes you are!

I would love one.

GladitsnotJustMe Thu 19-Sep-13 16:50:08

Oh god I'm going to have to clean the house this evening aren't I.....

Heaven forbid she finds my DP (her boss's) Poo crumbs or toenail clippings...!

GladitsnotJustMe Thu 19-Sep-13 16:51:51

What makes it worse is that I'll be here while she's cleaning... gonna feel like lady muck having her hoovering under my feet while I'm working on Mumsnet

Deadhamsterssmell Thu 19-Sep-13 17:05:35

I am a SAHM and would happily employ a cleaner if we could afford it. I hate cleaning!

I would feel awkward if I was in though.

Sorry, not much help except that you shouldn't feel guilty.

HarpyFishwifeTwat Thu 19-Sep-13 17:09:58

I'm in exactly the same position - DH WOHM very long hours, I work from home in hours that suit me and have no DC but I'm a total lazy cow and hate cleaning. Be glad to have the cleaner and be happy to keep someone in employment.

GladitsnotJustMe Thu 19-Sep-13 17:15:00

Harpy and Deadhamster thank you!!

I am a lazy cow, then feel guilty and spend all weekend cleaning while DP is at work, then feel even more guilty when I don't get it all done and we both spend our day off together cleaning...

The best I can do is to make it easy for her (by leaving the house tidy) and be nice to her. In my defence, I cleaned for friends and family when I worked part-time, and they never felt guilty!!

I'll be in tomorrow for her first day, just so I can show her where everything is. Then I'll try and make sure I'm out every other time, to give her some space.

KittensoftPuppydog Thu 19-Sep-13 17:16:20

I don't work full time and have no kids and I'm thinking of getting one. I really am lazy.
I used to be a cleaner though. It's not a bad job. I've also employed cleaners in the past. I've found that the key is to pretend to be very busy on the computer when they come round.

gintastic Thu 19-Sep-13 17:17:48

Are you mad? My cleaner starts tomorrow and I can't wait! 3DC's a d I've just gone back to work after mat leave. Having a cleaner was one of my deal breakers re working/not working...

Pinkbutterfly31 Thu 19-Sep-13 17:19:44

Don't worry about it! I have a lovely lady that does my ironing for me and I wouldn't be without it. It's the one job I can't bear. It's takes me about 3 hours to do about 5 items, whereas she can do a mountain so big, it has goats roaming the top of it in about an hour. Whatever makes life easier at the end of the day!

starfishmummy Thu 19-Sep-13 17:20:28

Please send her here!!

SoSoHappy Thu 19-Sep-13 17:23:45

I'm moving in with my new DP this weekend, and starting a new job in a couple of weeks. DP works long hours, I'll be working 37.5 hours a week in my new job and have said I'm happy to take over most of the cleaning but he's said we'll sort out a cleaner as he wants us to be able to enjoy our weekends as a couple. I won't feel guilty at all about having a cleaner. The time when I'm home while DP is still at work, I'm going to use for exercise or pampering and I'm going to thoroughly enjoy it grin

dirtyface Thu 19-Sep-13 17:25:12

no deffo not OP

esp as you work ft as well

i am a cleaner and most of my clients are (LUCKY) ladies who don't work at all as they don't need to so don't feel guilty or lazy

Tailtwister Thu 19-Sep-13 17:25:21

We have a cleaner once every 2 weeks. I work from home and love it when she comes. I have yet to tell DH that he spends £10 a fortnight for me to have a good cup of tea and a natter.

I used to feel really guilty when I didn't work OP, but now I do I don't. In reality I actually had more to do when I didn't work!

Charlottehere Thu 19-Sep-13 17:27:18

Lucky cow envy

animaniac Thu 19-Sep-13 17:32:24

don't feel guilty, I would love a cleaner! im currently on mat leave but going back to work in 2 months and I will see if we can afford one then. I dont want to waste family time at weekends/evenings cleaning the house!

KatieScarlett2833 Thu 19-Sep-13 17:35:34

The nano second DC leave home I'm getting a cleaner. I dream of this like others dream of winning the lottery.

Owllady Thu 19-Sep-13 17:37:09

do not feel guilty!
you both sound like really lovely people and it will be keeping her in work too, think of that (grin!)

GladitsnotJustMe Thu 19-Sep-13 17:37:10

Glad I'm not the only one.

Just makes me love DP even more for never complaining that I'm such a shit housewife.

I'm utterly shite at ironing too, he does that while I'm out at evening class once a week. God I'm rubbish!

squoosh Thu 19-Sep-13 17:37:14

Why should any woman feel guilty about outsourcing housework if she can afford to? Cleaning is deathly boring. Fact.

I'm sure your admin/cleaner is happy to be able to maintain her current wage.

Owllady Thu 19-Sep-13 17:39:44

my husband does the ironing a swell
really chill out!

bashifuku Thu 19-Sep-13 17:41:35

It's an arrangement that works for everyone. I really don't understand the guilt that comes from outsourcing this particular job.

I don't feel guilty or lazy that someone drives my groceries to my house, or that someone cleans my windows, or that I paid someone to fix a window that I possibly could've done myself. I work, I'm contributing to the economy, I am paying a decent wage. So why the angst?

QueOnda Thu 19-Sep-13 17:44:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KatyTheCleaningLady Thu 19-Sep-13 17:45:31

None of my clients are lazy cows.

carolmillen Thu 19-Sep-13 18:32:32

I'd like a cleaner but I wouldn't want someone I knew - might be a bit awkward if there were any issues or embarrassing situations! plus I'd want someone who was used to cleaning as their job.

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