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AIBU?

To wonder why people can't keep their houses in a basic state of cleanliness?

526 replies

HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:26

Disabilities aside, why can't people keep their homes basically clean?

I work part time, have a messy dog, a demanding toddler, am extremely lazy but my house always looks OK. You couldn't eat your tea off the top of the door frames but the kitchen surfaces are clean, floors hoovered, sofas plumped and inviting, toilet free of poo crumbs. It's easy and doesn't take long. So WHY do I go round to so many of my friend's houses and see they live in complete pits? Gritty nasty sofas that are horrible to sit on, filthy kitchens, poo smears and crumbs all over toilet, minging hand towels, floors covered in bits. IT IS NOT HARD to do the basics. I've just done a house once over and it's taken 45 minutes.

I understand not wanting to spend all day dusting your books or whatever but when people are coming over why wouldn't you want them to feel clean and comfy in your house? I'm not talking about people that physically can't do it because of illness or disability, but the rest of you? WHY??!!!

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kaosak · 16/09/2013 12:28

Get some new cleaner friends.

btw my house is too big to do in a day let alone 45 mins Wink

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dorisdaydream · 16/09/2013 12:29

oooh good luck with this one! Hope you've got a hard hat on!

FWIW though I do agree with you. My house isn't perfect and is messy as I live with four messy individuals, but it is always clean and hygienic

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Scholes34 · 16/09/2013 12:29

Well done, Harder, you must be very proud!

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SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 16/09/2013 12:29

Wtf are poo crumbs?!

My floors need sweeping but I cant be arsed to do.

Filth, pure filth!

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peachmint · 16/09/2013 12:30

Well done. Have a medal. That's what you wanted, isn't it?

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isitsnowingyet · 16/09/2013 12:31

Maybe they just don't care? Oh and well done for keeping your house tidy with a demanding toddler. Grin

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Whirliwig72 · 16/09/2013 12:31

I think some people just don't see the grime and mess. Also not an excuse (I like to keep things fairly tidy) but two young children playing together have the capacity to make things filthy in minutes so sometimes I've just cleaned then 20 minutes later there are smears on the windows, bits of apple on the sofa, skid marks in the loo etc so it can all be undone frighteningly quickly!

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Pagwatch · 16/09/2013 12:32

I don't think I have ever been in a house like the one you describe.

I think depression, anxiety and a sense of hopelessness - once a house gets really messy the amount it would take to clear it can become daunting - contribute.

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RobotLover68 · 16/09/2013 12:32

surprised you have any friends as you're so judgey Hmm

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Mumsyblouse · 16/09/2013 12:32

I agree with you to some extent, it is gross if you go to a house with a dirty bathroom or there is visible filth about the place, but you work part-time, I don't, I work in a long hours professional job and when I get that very short amount of time (about 1 hour) in the evening between the children going to bed and me following, I am exhausted and don't want to spend it on housework (I often do though).

I do what I can in the time I have and in relation to how much I care. I also have to say it's easier if you have decluttered, Flylady is right on that one, if you have clear surfaces/everything put away, cleaning is quick, if you have to go round piles of letters/newspapers/bathroom stuff, no clean is ever quick.

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HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:32

Thanks for my medal! Is it gold?

But no, don't think I'm anyone special. I'm probably laziest person in entire universe. So if I can do it, why can't everyone?

It always seems to be the flappy, permanently flustered types too. I'm sure their homes are not helping their state of mind.

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EmeraldJeanie · 16/09/2013 12:32

Maybe not the pooh crumbs but have house full of clutter to deal with. Not proud..
Take more than 45 bloody minutes to sort mind [skip/ will power/ new dh and children needed].

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MarianneEnjolras · 16/09/2013 12:33

There are crumbs on my kitchen worksurfaces, the floors haven't been hoovered in over a week. There are toys all over the place and the bookshelves are a state (untidy).

However, we have clean dishes and clothes and are all bathed and showered. Ds is happy and I am enjoying two days off work.

The hoovering will still be there later. Even if I do it now, it will still need doing again at some point so why worry?

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queenofdrama · 16/09/2013 12:33

This is why I don't invite people round. Judgey pants like you. Yes I keep our home in a state if basic cleanliness but it might not be to everyone else's standards.

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SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 16/09/2013 12:33

My sofa bow has crumbs on. Dunker crumbs, not poo crumbs.

I dont care, no ones coming over and the toddler is eating and is quiet.

45 minutes for a full house? It takes me nearly that to clear up my sons toys Grin

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HarderToKidnap · 16/09/2013 12:33

My working days are the days the house is the cleanest, tbh. If no one is in it then they can't make too much mess.

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LeaveTheBastid · 16/09/2013 12:34

Well don't you sound like a gem of a friend, full of support, non judgemental, there to offer a hand even when not asked... Oh wait.

May you sit on a stray toilet seat pube when you have the misfortune to visit one of your 'friends' again.

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Onesleeptillwembley · 16/09/2013 12:34

A once over in 45 minutes? Then you're just tidying and not cleaning properly. That's disgusting. I'd far rather be in an untidy clean place than a tidy filthy place. Bit fur coat and no knickers.

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EmeraldJeanie · 16/09/2013 12:34

Yup- I probably am flappy and flustered too- oh dear, I'm doomed...

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eragon · 16/09/2013 12:34

you have ONE child and a dog? well yeah my house was tidy with one and two children. got to 3rd and 4th and throw in part time work and yeah, my house is messy.


in the grand scheme of life a clean floor is very low on my priority.

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GoingUpInTheWorld · 16/09/2013 12:35

I ve always wondered this too op.

Dh tells me nobody has a house as clean and organised as ours. Hes a tradesman and goes into lots of different houses.

He says 99% of houses he goes into are disgusting.

I tend to find people who dont clean use excuses like - nobody ever says they wished they cleaned more, a clean house is a sign of a wasted life etc..

IMO a dirty house is a sign of a scruffy, dirty sod.

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moondog · 16/09/2013 12:35

Il give you a gold medal.
Make it a platinum!
Like you ,I am totally perplexed as to how many live in a seemingly permanent state of chaos and filth.
I have been viewing houses recently and most haven't even been tidied up. Many have had shitty (literally) lavatories too.

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GoingUpInTheWorld · 16/09/2013 12:35

I ve always wondered this too op.

Dh tells me nobody has a house as clean and organised as ours. Hes a tradesman and goes into lots of different houses.

He says 99% of houses he goes into are disgusting.

I tend to find people who dont clean use excuses like - nobody ever says they wished they cleaned more, a clean house is a sign of a wasted life etc..

IMO a dirty house is a sign of a scruffy, dirty sod.

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SilverApples · 16/09/2013 12:35

You work part-time, which helps.
Well, I look at my house and I'm particular about bits of it, the bathroom and the kitchen are clean, laundry is done and towels etc are changed often.
But I'm thinking of selling my dustbunnies on etsy as craft felt and art works.
We are also very particular about the friends we invite over. They come for the company and the food and the friendship, not to assess our housekeeping.

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moondog · 16/09/2013 12:35

'IMO a dirty house is a sign of a scruffy, dirty sod.'

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