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Friend of DH arriving on a Sunday at 7.34am

(145 Posts)
Fairy1303 Sun 15-Sep-13 07:44:09

My DH is a nice person. (read, mug.) friend was supposed to come over yesterday to talk about a business they are in the process of starting up. Friend cancelled. last minute.

Friend tried to re-arrange for today - no time given.

Today, we are child free, we went out for the night together last night. As our youngest is 12 weeks old, our lie ins are pretty precious to me.

We also have in laws coming over for Sunday lunch, so busy morning.

So when friend tries to rearrange, DH says non - committal 'oh mate, we're pretty busy tomorrow, got parents coming for lunch and busy morning.
Could possible spare an hour or so before but another day would be better.'

Response: 'ah ok.'

Then this morning, 7.15am - DH gets a text - 'Hi mate - I'm on my way. Be with you at 7.30ish.'

So now he's downstairs!!!

AIBU to be so fucking angry I ripped DH to shreads this morning and would honestly like to go down there and explain to this prick exactly how unwelcome he is?! Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fucking fuck fuck fuckprick.

Worriedkat Sun 15-Sep-13 08:36:00

I don't think the friend IBU. Your DHs text suggests that you have a busy morning and lunch but he can spare an hour before. Doesn't that suggest very early morning, ie before your average Sunday morning time of 9am onwards??

Communication slip up....

fuckwittery Sun 15-Sep-13 08:39:52

Your dh's friend is mental, the appropriate response to your DH's text would be ok, what time. NOT turn up at 7.30am on a sunday!!!

ipswichwitch Sun 15-Sep-13 08:42:31

I would be tempted to go and remove the FIFA and announce that if he's going to turn up so bloody early on a Sunday morning, there will only be business discussions, not arsing about on the computer. If your Sunday lie in is going to be ruined it certainly shouldn't be by pissing about on computers. But then again I'm a right grumpy cow when my sleep is affected!

Ragwort Sun 15-Sep-13 08:44:19

Agree with littlewhitebag - sounds as though your DH and his friend are really motivated to get together and have a chat about the business. We run our own business and often have to work at very irregular hours, we don't switch off outside the hours of 9-5 and I am sure most succesful entrepeneurs are more interested than working than having a sunday morning lie-in hmm.

Why does it even bother you, so long as you don't have to get up and join them, can't you enjoy the lie in on your own?

You sound rather controlling, I would hate my DH to tell me what I could or couldn't do at 7.30am on a Sunday morning.

meganorks Sun 15-Sep-13 08:45:58

I can understand tour annoyance I would be livid. But in fairness don't think its your DH fault. Any reasonable person would have interpreted yesterdays response as come another day. And no reasonable person would think any time before 9 on a Sunday is acceptable (and to be honest I would want someone to say what time ok on a Sunday)

Rosiebells Sun 15-Sep-13 08:48:10

Roll over and get cosy in the middle of the bed..... Ahhhhh, now doesn't that feel better.

TwoStepsBeyond Sun 15-Sep-13 08:50:14

I love my sleep and I love snuggling with DP when there are no DCs around, so I completely get why you're so pissed off. Have a word with your DH about boundaries and family time, running your own business can have a tendency to take over all your free time so you need to make sure that both he and his partner understand that, while you're behind them on this venture, some family time is important to you and your baby.

DidoTheDodo Sun 15-Sep-13 08:50:15

Personally I'd much prefer this time that 11.00pm on a Sunday!
it's your DH's meeting - can't you just snooze through it (and give him the baby)? And at least they are showing a commitment to the business - isn't that better than delaying things interminably?

Fairy1303 Sun 15-Sep-13 08:53:15


We have a 12 week old baby and an 8 year old.

They were both at GPs last night.
We do not get lazy lie ins together anymore. This is what we had planned.

I also expect him to help me get the house ready/ food ready for lunch when his family are coming.

I said to him yesterday that today was not a good day for those reasons. That is not control, that is courtesy. I think suggesting that is un called for and unfair.

And lets be clear here - this was not a pre arranged time. This friend decided that 7.30 was the time he would arrive. Didn't even run it by us, just arrived.

Oh. and they have been playing FIFA basically since he arrived.

That is not 'dedication to a business'.

Mckayz Sun 15-Sep-13 08:58:12

I would go and take away the power cable for the Xbox/PS3 etc and go back to bed with it.

I would be killing my DH if he had done this. Don't give a shit if it is controlling.

QuintessentialShadows Sun 15-Sep-13 09:00:32

Go down and tell friend that his hour is up and if he is to inconvenience the family any further on a Sunday morning he gets to peel potatoes.
What arses. Both of them. Your husband would be a fool to go into "business" with this man.

GirlWithTheDirtyShirt Sun 15-Sep-13 09:01:40

I wouldn't answer the door to anyone at 7:30 in a Sunday. Nor would DP.

thistlelicker Sun 15-Sep-13 09:02:17

Op u admit its the friend who just turned up so unfair to blame hubby for that! Shout down and ask him to bring u a brew in bed and give him a look that tells him ur peed for them playing FIFA !

Repeatedlydoingthetwist Sun 15-Sep-13 09:04:27

If the friend was that dedicated to the business he wouldn't have cancelled yesterday would he?! OP I feel for you, this is not acceptable at all, it shows a lack of basic manners, and IMO to turn up without confirmation it's ok at any time of the day is rude, let alone this early! Go and remove FIFA from them, and give them an end time for this 'meeting'.

petalsandstars Sun 15-Sep-13 09:04:29

Yep. The hour is up and you are both busy. Bye bye

Repeatedlydoingthetwist Sun 15-Sep-13 09:05:25

Oh and also agree that DH can take some of the blame here. He should have said no when friend text, and he also shouldn't have answered the door!

DidoTheDodo Sun 15-Sep-13 09:06:39

Is it just me that thinks that 7.30 isn't actually that early?
I'm definitely a lark - maybe your friend is too?

Trigglesx Sun 15-Sep-13 09:07:27

He should have at least kept to the business at hand and not gotten busy playing FIFA. If they are going to go into business together, he must start as he means to go on - setting boundaries on your private time and keeping business to business rather than playing.

JoinYourPlayfellows Sun 15-Sep-13 09:09:16

"I think this is a MASSIVE red flag about going into business with this guy. If he thinks 7.30 on a Sunday is an appropriate time to talk business what else will he think is ok?"

This "business" is a complete load of shite. And it is going to be used as an excuse for these two boys to have lots of playdates together that you aren't supposed to be allowed to criticise because they are "entrepreneurs" hmm

This loser just fancied coming over to yours this morning (probably to get away from his own children) to play FIFA.

Tell him to get fucked.

NOBODY calls to somebody else's house at 7.30 on a Sunday without a very good reason and a prior invitation.

Mckayz Sun 15-Sep-13 09:09:34

Dido, 7:30 isn't early for me when the children are here. But if they were at their grandparents like the OP's are then yes 7:30 is really bloody early.

TooTabooToBoo Sun 15-Sep-13 09:10:37

If it was me I would, hand on heart, go downstairs and unplug the game, turn to him and tell him he is out of order and needs to leave.

tell him H will be in touch to arrange a meeting in the week.

Friend is a fuckwit.

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee Sun 15-Sep-13 09:13:58

YANBU - not at all - and that's coming from someone who is always up at the crack of dawn!

Your DH's friend is rude - but he did text to say he was on his way, your DH should have text back 'Don't be daft - see you later in the week'.

It isn't a business meeting - it's FIFA playing. Childish & ridiculous to act like it's an 'important' meeting.

My DH would be going into business with this guy over my dead body and he'd be told to find a backbone as well.

SamHamwidge Sun 15-Sep-13 09:16:09

I wouldn't dream of turning up at that hou on a Sunday!

Some people.just have no clue.

Agree with other posters, earplugs in and go back to sleep, speak to dh later when his dickhead friend has gone home.

arethereanyleftatall Sun 15-Sep-13 09:16:18

Your dh is the one who lost his lie in, not you.
Be careful about blaming him for things,which aren't his fault. He'd just getting on with the situation.

Mckayz Sun 15-Sep-13 09:17:45

It is her DH's fault. He should have said yesterday that no Sunday is no good for me. And then this morning not answered the door.

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