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Fuming with grandparents n lack of support from my dad.

(123 Posts)
ElBombero Sat 07-Sep-13 05:10:32

Grandparents and my dad come over today to meet my 2 day old son. They asked of we had chosen a name, so said yes and told them the name. And their reaction amazed me "what your actually going to christen him that?" "He won't thank you for it when he's older" "it's a Chinese / Asian name" "have you thought of William instead" I was amazed, my DH was out n felt like they just launched on me.l, I was completely unprepared and obviously ubber emotional after just giving birth.
I told them to stop said I don't want any negative connotations on my sons name and it was mine and DH decision and we love it. It carried on a little "well you best give him a middle name to use if he wants" cheeky cheeky selfish bastards I just got angry then. If I dispised a name anyone had chosen family / friend / stranger I would always do the right thing and said it was lovely, not react like that, I'm seriously pissed off.

Bambamb Sat 07-Sep-13 08:13:14

Sonny is a lovely name ! I love love love love it, just ignore them.
We had a similar reaction from my MIL when we told her our DS name. His also has a middle name and she said she would just use that instead! ! Fortunately we have thick skins and were confident in our choice so we didn't let it get us down. Still totally love his name (which I may add is not particularly weird or unusual! )
Just remember it doesn't matter what name you pick there will always be some who don't like it or wouldn't use it for their own child but if that wasn't the case then all kids would have the same name!

ExcuseTypos Sat 07-Sep-13 08:14:15

MissOtisRegrets " WalzingMatilda are you Katie Hopkins???"


waltzingmathilda Sat 07-Sep-13 08:14:19

Who is Katie Hopkins?

Catsize Sat 07-Sep-13 08:15:20

It is the sort of name that may provoke a reaction I guess. Certainly doesnt fit into the 'Bible, kings and queens' category. Perhaps they would have preferred the latter and their faces would have told their reaction, even if they had kept quiet. They have come round to accepting your choice it seems.

Catsize Sat 07-Sep-13 08:15:58

Sorry, I meant accepting 'it's' your choice. They probably still don't like the name!

Snoopingforsoup Sat 07-Sep-13 08:16:18

Sonny is a lovely name.

Congrats on the little man. grin

In 3 months time, your Father will not imagine him being called anything else. I had the same from my Pa and smirked when I reminded him what and why he named his kids what he did.

pinkdelight Sat 07-Sep-13 08:50:40

It's a lovely name, OP, but I'd cut your family some slack. It's very much of now as a name and in their generation it had totally different connotations. Not sure about the race thing, but if you were telling a child off you'd call him 'sonny'. It's natural they'd be taken aback by it and as others have said, older people can be less good at editing their reactions. Or else they just felt strongly concerned enough for your DS that they had to say something. Yanbu to feel upset by it, but I don't think their reaction was a lack of support/love for you and DS.

FrigginRexManningDay Sat 07-Sep-13 09:04:36

I have a posh UK name/common American name. This whole nName/Brand is awful. A newborn baby already being put under pressure to succeed because they have been named to succeed in financial/power terms. What about personal success?

sparklekitty Sat 07-Sep-13 09:16:25

Namechangeus is right, prepare yourself for years of 'advice'. I love my granny but my goodness we've almost come to blows a few times. She is obsessed with DD being warm enough, now I know she grew up in rural Ireland with no heating but honestly, you'd think she was trying to roast the baby for Christmas dinner last year. Piles and piles of blankets!

The best advice she gave me was to stop breast feeding (as its not good for them) get her on to a bottle with a tot of whiskey in to help her sleep! My DH was shock and grin at the same time.

Sonny is a beautiful name (possibly one to steal for any future DS I may be having!)

Bambamb Sat 07-Sep-13 09:22:54

Haha at the whisky, now why didn't I think of that in those sleep deprived days?

Kundry Sat 07-Sep-13 09:29:55

Sorry you are so upset. But I did instantly think of the character from the Godfather and I suspect your parents are of an age to do the same.

monkeymamma Sat 07-Sep-13 09:31:11

YANBU OP, the name Sonny is lovely and he will grow up to be a lovely, happy, sunny child. Ignore or laugh at silly comments, they would probably have objected no matter what you'd chosen (honestly).

I have got to challenge the 'Kais and Jaydens have been pigeonholed' comment (ridiculous). These names will be super common by the time they are adults, no differently to eg Paul or Gavin now. They will be judged on their merits like anyone else with a reasonably popular, of-its-time kind of name. I know a baby Jayden in real life and he and his mum are lovely, she is smart and classy and he's a super boy. I don't see any connotations to his name. To be frank the only place where Kais and Jaydens are pigeonholed is on Mumsnet.

foslady Sat 07-Sep-13 09:31:59

People thhought Zara was a bit different until Princess Anne used it..........just saying.......

NotYoMomma Sat 07-Sep-13 09:34:12

my mum hates our potential name and keeps saying 'how about Lucy?' every single time I see her. I say no very firmly and give reasons.

then next time 'what about Lucy?' as if it is a brand new suggestion I may have never considered

drives me batshit

MadeOfStarDust Sat 07-Sep-13 09:36:19

be prepared for his nickname to be Jim...... can just about guarantee his grandparents will call him "Sonny Jim"

Dobbiesmum Sat 07-Sep-13 09:36:51

It's a really lovely name, just be prepared to introduce him as 'Sonny yes that is his actual name' for a while. Some people get confused if you don't use what they call a 'real' first name and try to make sense out of it, almost like they can't process something out of the ordinary.
My DS's name is a short version of a popular biblical name and we spent years saying 'no, not X, it's Y'.

BlingBang Sat 07-Sep-13 09:39:23

I think names can enhance and hamper to a degree so you do have to think it all out and probably to the older generation it does sound a bit strange.

But, I really like Sonny and know a little boy called that. It seems so normal now and nothing naff about it. Loved Sol myself but wasn't brave enough to go there.

BarbarianMum Sat 07-Sep-13 09:41:03

<<Most parents have aspirations for their children - I worked on the basis that names should be standard, non offensive, not attributable to race creed or colour but above all timeless.>>

How dull.

bridgetsmum Sat 07-Sep-13 09:45:56

If I'm being perfectly honest, I hate that name. To me it sounds like a pet name you would call your child, not a real name.

Sorry to be so harsh, people have their own opinions and if my child was going to use that name for their child I wouldn't be able to hold my tongue either. blush

Congratulations on the birth of your son,

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Sat 07-Sep-13 09:50:15

I love the name Sonny. So cheerful and lovely.

Everyone hated my youngest son's name at first and MIL even pointed out that her SIL gave her dog the shortened version of the name. I giveth not a fuck and love his name as much as ever.

BlingBang Sat 07-Sep-13 09:51:16

Ok, will admit when we first heard Sonny it did sound strange and took a little getting used to, forgot as we are so used to it now.

know a Buster and a Tiger - when you hear them being shouted out you do turn your head. Once you know them you don't think about it.

MimiSunshine Sat 07-Sep-13 09:58:04

Of people really discount names because it doesn't sound like the name of a CEO?
Yes because the only people happy and successful in this life are CEOs. No one else who isn't one has never amounted to anything.

Does no one who subscribes to this way of thinking actually realise that by the time these children are approaching that age and role, the names will be as standard as Karen, Alison and John?

OP ignore your GPs they don't like it, so what. You handled it well and put them in their place. Stick to the name and get some new born snuggling in

FrigginRexManningDay Sat 07-Sep-13 09:58:14

I worked with a lady named Joy years ago. She was a misery guts. Names do not make the person.

maras2 Sat 07-Sep-13 10:07:33

Our niece has a child called Sonny.Lovely name for such a beautiful boy.You can't help but smile when you say it.Your family are being rather mean.

Longtallsally Sat 07-Sep-13 10:14:25

Its a lovely name. Sorry that someone close to you had to burst your 'gorgeous baby blue balloon of happiness after a great birth'. Try to forgive them, and you will get it back, and can enjoy your baby again. Mine was burst by the most foul tempered hospital assistant, four hours after giving birth, who woke me - at 7am - shrieking "Where is your menu? why haven't you filled out your menu for today? They should have told you when you came in (at 3am??) last night!" I stil fume at the thought of it - was too shell shocked by a 28 hour labour, huge tear and total lack of sleep to react at the time. Bubble well and truly splattered!

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