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To detest gawpers.

(57 Posts)
MrsLouisTheroux Fri 30-Aug-13 15:26:13

We were in a queue of traffic because a man had been hit by a vehicle. He was lying on the road and had lost some of his clothes. The ambulance/ police arrived as we were sitting in our car.
I was horrified that so many people in front of our car got out of their car to have a good old look. We could just see the man from our car behind theirs ( he was being attended to by others) and it was clear and obvious that there had been an accident.
The number of rubber neckers who got out of cars/ opened doors/ leaned out of windows to get a better view was unbelievable. They didn't go to help, they were gawping.
The cars started to move and the one in front of us actually stopped alongside the man to have an even better look. WTF?
AIBU? Am I the only one to think that this is awful? The people driving in front of me seemed to think it was ok angry

YouTheCat Fri 30-Aug-13 15:42:10

It is dreadful.

Plus these are the stupid twats who cause further accidents by not paying attention to driving and also cause massive and, mainly unnecessary, tail backs.

RoastedCouchPotatoes Fri 30-Aug-13 15:43:52

YANBU. I think it's not unusual to wonder as such, but to stop, look etc; is dreadful?

SoleSource Fri 30-Aug-13 15:47:09

There is the possibility that the drivers might know a person with the same model of car and colour and are worried it could be him/her.


UriGeller Fri 30-Aug-13 15:49:57

No, YANBU. I can't look and I do judge people who have to gawp.

I think its shameful and shows a lack of compassion for the dignity of the injured person.

MaxPepsi Fri 30-Aug-13 15:58:17

I look, so does my DH.

But then I'm a trained first aider and DH is a fireman. He has pulled over before now to offer assistance in an off duty capacity. I have stopped at a scene of an accident to offer support and to help with traffic.

You would think we are rubber neckers however as most of the time we don't need to offer our help.

MrsLouisTheroux Fri 30-Aug-13 15:58:32

I would hate the thought of being in that situation and having people watching sad sad

MrsLouisTheroux Fri 30-Aug-13 16:02:03

Max I doubt very much that the 10 or so cars in front of me yesterday had emergency service personnel as passengers grin

thebody Fri 30-Aug-13 16:02:43

it's human nature and most people are looking in compassion.

however I would like to rip the head off the person who photographed my bleeding and distressed dd ( 12)following an accident and the picture was published with her face in full view without our consent on the front of one of our daily news papers. the vile one.

they have paid for that mistake though.😡

MaxPepsi Fri 30-Aug-13 16:05:14

You'd me amazed how many off duty firemen there are at any one time Mrs L grin

MaxPepsi Fri 30-Aug-13 16:05:30


dimdommilpot Fri 30-Aug-13 16:09:43

YANBU. There was a murder near my house last week and the police are still on scene, the amount of times i have to break suddenly because the car in front has realised it was 'that place on the news' and stop to have a look is unbelievable. Its a narrow road with a blind junction and people are causing mayhem just to have a nosey at this poor blokes hoise.

dimdommilpot Fri 30-Aug-13 16:10:38


NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Fri 30-Aug-13 16:10:58

Looking in compassion what a crock! They are curious! They're also a bit sick...OP yanbu. I wish people would have more decency.

MrsLouisTheroux Fri 30-Aug-13 16:36:18

It is morbid curiosity neo hmm TV is full of documentaries/ programmes aimed at those who like a good look. I imagine that the TV producers have the consent of people involved most of the time.
Not the same on the news and in papers as you found out the body angry.

thebody Fri 30-Aug-13 16:53:30

yes agree MrsLT dds school had reporters swarming around the gates for a week offering cash to pupils to talk about the injured girls and their teacher who died.

Neo, to be honest we found in our experience people were lovely and wanted to help.

at the scene we were told numerous cars and coaches stopped to offer help and support.

you will always get people who don't give a crap but that's not the vast majority in our experience.

pianodoodle Fri 30-Aug-13 16:59:38

If they can genuinely help then fine but I'd rather get out of the way and make room if I couldn't do anything (or drive past) than be a slack jawed gawker sad

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Fri 30-Aug-13 17:03:34

Gawpers must be HARD too. The few times I have inadvertently seen an accident, I have been very upset...don't they have feelings ffs? I looked away very quickly...even an old lady falling over upsets me badly!

ShatnersBassoon Fri 30-Aug-13 17:07:39

YANBU, what purpose do they think they're serving by getting a better look? They can't actually enjoy seeing injured people, they're not volunteering to help, they're certainly not trying to prevent further accidents.

On a much smaller scale, my youngest was sick suddenly and with absolutely no warning on the pavement outside a busy cafe at a tourist attraction earlier in the week. The number of people who just stopped, stared and pulled faces was horrible, and nobody even offered a tissue or asked if there was something they could do to help. They seemed to want to feel disgusted by watching a child vomit up their mother's legs confused

perplexedpirate Fri 30-Aug-13 17:25:10

I saw a bad accident once from a motorway bridge (car had missed turning and attempted to go at last minute, hit verge at speed and flipped completely over).
I have never seen anything like it and I was hysterical. Phoned police and ambulance, obviously, and then stayed watching. I tried to get down the verge but couldn't, partially because my legs were like jelly but I stayed because I was desperate for the passenger get out and be ok. The ambulance was very quick and took them away, and I tried to find out what happened later, but couldn't. I so, so, hope they were all right.
It haunts me to this day.
So you would probably have thought I was a rubber-necking ghoul with no thought for the injured.
Nothing could have been further from the truth, but thanks. hmm

ClangerOnaComeDown Fri 30-Aug-13 17:35:03

They are not gawpers they are what we call the oh my god squad they are annoying, get in the way and cause no end if nuisances and annoyances.

CrispyFB Fri 30-Aug-13 17:48:41

Totally YANBU. Obviously there are exceptions as have been mentioned (those who actually can help, those caught up in the incident themselves in some way, or like perplexedpirate above) but the rest should be ashamed of themselves.

I try and look the other way if I can because I feel so bad for those involved.. plus you can't "unsee" anything you might see. I have zero skills that might be of use so unless it's a major incident where any hand will be useful, there is nothing I could do except get in the way and/or slow down traffic.

I still feel angry at the minorish accident we had about 9 years ago. We had to stand on the verge waiting for $stuff and it seemed most cars slowed down to gawp at us. We weren't injured (aside from the whiplash which has been the bane of my life ever since..) just something to stare at. I am really quite shy and lacking in confidence and it really made a bad situation that much more panic-inducing as I had nowhere to run away and hide and not be on display.

BuskersCat Fri 30-Aug-13 17:50:09

If I'm in a total standstil with no sign of moving soon I turn off my engine and get out. Not to look, but because I like a good stretch

ClaireCharlie Fri 30-Aug-13 17:52:50

I've driven by quite a few accidents and it is just human nature to look. But I would never stop or slow down my car to get a better look and I certainly would never get out of my car (unless I was actually going to help)

I had an accident not too long back. My car was smashed up and I was waiting on the pavement for the breakdown truck and the amount of people open mouthed staring just stood staring made the situation 100x worse.

Sparrowfarts Fri 30-Aug-13 18:09:37

If you're not a paramedic or an off-duty firefighter and are unable to help, your duty is to keep well out out of thecway of those who are assisting and not cannon

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