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To think some people are completely lacking in compassion?

(152 Posts)
SirBoobAlot Thu 29-Aug-13 19:53:31

I was in London yesterday. Got to Victoria for the train home around 6.30pm. Heard the following announcement; "Southern are sorry to announce delays on <destination> service due to <computer pause> a person being hit by a train". This was repeated every minute with various destinations. Basically, no trains going South.

I finally got on a train about quarter to ten.

I was disgusted by what I heard, both waiting at the station, and then when on the train. People complaining about wanting to get home, about how 'inconvenient' it was. Several comments of "fucking jumpers" - one woman even said "Why can't they just go to Beachy Head if that's how they're feeling?".

It made me feel sick. Yes, everyone was tired. Yes, everyone wanted to get home. But someone had fucking DIED. And with it being announced every ten fucking seconds, there was no way you could not know what the delays were caused by.

I was disgusted with people. Either it was a horrific accident, and someone lost their life, or it wasn't an accident, and someone felt horrific enough to end their life. Either way, someone died. What is a few hours at a train station if you get home?

I don't get it.

Fontofnowt Thu 29-Aug-13 19:57:54

That must have been shitty.
Be glad you don't think like the selfish fuckers I would hate to be so as self obsessed.

FruOla Thu 29-Aug-13 19:59:15

I think the reason the train operators have to announce that there has been a fatality is so that passengers can actually understand why the trains will not be running for the next couple of hours.

The rest of it ....... shock

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 29-Aug-13 19:59:42


Some people have lost their sense of perspective.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 29-Aug-13 20:00:20

I feel very very sorry for train drivers, though

needaholidaynow Thu 29-Aug-13 20:00:43

There was no need for the snide comments. Some people are just idiots.

lljkk Thu 29-Aug-13 20:00:45

Some MNers do for sure (reply to title).

HandMini Thu 29-Aug-13 20:00:48

Couldn't agree more. My (fairly distant) cousin posted something on Facebook along the same lines re a delayed train and a suicide. I have de friended her. No loss.

Jewelledkaleidoscope Thu 29-Aug-13 20:01:27

I've heard crap like this before. I hate it.

QOD Thu 29-Aug-13 20:03:27

I know a few commuters from where I used to work, the problem is that it happens at least once a month and they just get hardened to it and sick of it.

Does piss me off whenever one has a rant about it though, they also rant about the poor train drivers though so its not like they're bereft of compassion, just a bit misplaced when it directly affects them.

I suppose if the end of your road was a popular suicide spot, you would soon get pissed off sitting in your car for 3 hours every few weeks.

SirBoobAlot Thu 29-Aug-13 20:03:29

Yes, felt very sorry for the driver, and for the passengers on the train involved. More so for the individual sad

And I understand it's crap if you've had a long day, and you can't get home, but it really upset me. I got home around midnight. But I got home.

justmyview Thu 29-Aug-13 20:06:05

I remember a thread about this very topic several months ago. I was surprised how many people came on saying "Well if you've lived in London for a while, you do become less sensitive about it." Certainly made me glad not to live in London if that's what it does to you

Faithless12 Thu 29-Aug-13 20:07:09

Now I don't know about the people on the train yesterday but if there were no trains at all from earlier in the day until late into the night there is no one to pick up our DS.
Also as pointed out by my DH there are always delays on our Southern line because of rain, leaves on the track so people may see it as another 'excuse' for rubbish service.

I don't however, agree with their comments but can see people frustrations when you are doing that commute everyday and there is either an issue with Southern or on the underground 50% of the time you just want to go home and spend time with your loved ones at a reasonable time.

Dackyduddles Thu 29-Aug-13 20:08:00

Oh gosh im so torn on this.

You don't do that 365 do you with every Tom dick or Charlotte randomly diving off busy routes with a sole intention of causing as much upset as humanly possible?

It's a suicide. I dread to think what kind of 7th hell they are in to think a train is a decent way to go but holding thousands of people to ransom because you dont wish to live is selfish. There are hundreds of ways to do it. You choose rush hour busy routes for reasons. Many are likely humongously sad but some aren't and its for attention.

I've just stated what you hated. I'm going to get roasted 7 different ways in 30 secs. It's horrific. I'm not condoning it but when you rest on travel and it happens on pretty grim regularity your natural sense of shock and empathy gets black. And these sentiments distance you from the horror.

GobbySadcase Thu 29-Aug-13 20:11:42

The compassion level in general is pretty poor, definitely far worse in the past few years.

gettingtogrips Thu 29-Aug-13 20:13:24

Agree with you Dackyduddles, good post.

Tabby1963 Thu 29-Aug-13 20:18:20

I agree Dacky. The train driver's trauma can only be imagined sad

People are posting about commuters being "self obsessed" for complaining about the inconvenience of getting home or to work hours late, missing important appointments, events etc.

How self obsessed do you have to be to choose suicide by train? Why not take an overdose in the privacy of your own place?

Thepowerof3 Thu 29-Aug-13 20:18:22

It is also sometimes hard for people to feel empathy or compassion for someone they don't know and as Dackyduddles says it does seem odd to choose rush hour. Saying that they may have jumped hours ago but the knock on effect can take all day to resume proper service

BrokenSunglasses Thu 29-Aug-13 20:19:34

I don't think it's fair to say that people have no compassion because they are annoyed that they won't get home in time to eat properly or see their own children.

Of course the fact that someone has died is more important than those things, but for regular commuters, delays like this can happen quite frequently and it's going to be annoying to them.

In just the same way that you don't know what was going on in the suicide victims lives, you don't know what was going on in your fellow commuters lives either, and plenty of them may have had their own problems to deal with that made it difficult for them to be entirely selfless when their evening has been ruined.

magicturnip Thu 29-Aug-13 20:19:38


bebopanddoowop Thu 29-Aug-13 20:19:59

I completely agree - I feel sick to my stomach when people make comments like that.

To feel suicidal is not thinking "straight" and is linked to a mental illness or depression and such like - rational thought doesn't come into it! The consequences won't have been considered - it's a need for immediate escape most likely thought of as their only/best choice, which is incredibly tragic.

People that make comments that are annoyed about someone in that situation clearly have no compassion and have no idea what that person must have been going through - which I find strange because I'm sure everyone knows someone that has/is going through depression or another mental illness. Yet another reason we should talk more about such things!

SauvignonBlanche Thu 29-Aug-13 20:20:41

It's the anonymity isn't it, of the 'body on the line'.

Wuldric Thu 29-Aug-13 20:20:48

I am with Dacky, in fact I'm probably a few steps further on in terms of lacking compassion.

I travel a lot by train and tube and it is a regular occurrence - say once every six months or so. Sometimes it's a minor inconvenience causing 30 minutes' delay. Sometimes it is a major inconvenience, causing hours of delay. Once it was a major trauma (as when I witnessed someone throwing themselves under a tube train at King's Cross).

But every time, I know that there is anger against the world involved and an intention to hurt others in the means of self-destruction chosen. I feel sorry for the individual, but I don't think it is fair to hurt other people and innocent bystanders in the process.

In your situation I would not have felt compassion as my overriding emotion. There would have been a smidgeon of compassion and a lot of irritation and a flashback to the KX tube incident. So I understand your fellow commuters.

TheProsAndConsOfHitchhiking Thu 29-Aug-13 20:23:15

Yanbu. That is awful behaviour. My dad lost his leg being hit by a train, luckily it wasn't his life, the thought of people sat on that train saying things like that makes me feel sick.

Littleen Thu 29-Aug-13 20:23:24

Sounds like the same people who call out that those who commit suicide are selfish, particularly those who jump in front of trains. It is indeed disgusting, and as passengers, we never know if it was an intentional death or not. Have witnessed similar things many times on the tube in London and other trains around England. So sad sad

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