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To think its not my fault workmate slept on train station and 'could have got mugged'

(45 Posts)
Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 12:09:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Peachy Tue 27-Aug-13 12:12:26

She has MASSIVE responsibility issues!

If you did say things in front of a client then boss probably has a point on that- 'we will discuss this LATER' in a freeze out voice is only response no matter what is said when clients present. However you should get understanding for the position you were in, she should get a serious disciplinary.

shock Being disciplined because your colleague doesn't know how to behave like an adult?
Have you said things at work about it?

Shakirasma Tue 27-Aug-13 12:14:19

I would put on a formal grievance against her.

If it was work event, her employers may have some legal duty towards her actually, but unless you are her line manager then it all sounds rather weird.

kali110 Tue 27-Aug-13 12:16:38

Thats awfull! Sounds very childish. She may not recall clearly what happened if she was so intoxicated. Why are you being disciplined though, did you say things back?

timidviper Tue 27-Aug-13 12:16:39

Document everything, discuss nothing with your colleague (do as Peachy said) and put the whole lot in as a formal complaint, making it clear that the stress of your colleague's poor behaviour is making you ill and you expect the company to fulfil its duties in dealing with this.

HotCrossPun Tue 27-Aug-13 12:18:36

She sounds very childish.

Don't speak to her or other colleagues about this again, you are going to be drawn into a petty 'she said' 'no she said' thing.

Speak to your boss privately about what has been going on and how it is effecting your working environment.

Tiredemma Tue 27-Aug-13 12:19:26

where do you work? what has this got to do with your boss??

put in a formal grievance against her.

Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 12:21:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

redexpat Tue 27-Aug-13 12:23:48

You have responded in exactly the right way. You sound like a top professional.

quesadilla Tue 27-Aug-13 12:27:42

Put in a formal grievance. She sounds unhinged, frankly, and you don't want to leave your professional reputation in the hands of someone who is being actively spiteful about you.

If it were just a minor he-said-she-said thing I'd maintain a dignified silence but if she's saying things that are slanderous you have to take a stand.

Be as cool and professional as you can with her to her face and don't get dragged into a public slanging match but put in a formal complaint to management, get something on record and make it clear you want it stopped.

If you belong to a union, I'd recommend going to them for legal advice too on an informal basis.

Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 12:29:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

specialsubject Tue 27-Aug-13 12:32:07

your response in front of clients was entirely correct. Keep repeating this.

if she swills the booze until she can't get home that is not your problem.

I agree that you need to put in a formal complaint and get this sorted, as she is clearly a liar as well as a drunk and has some childish grudge against you. Take the initiative before the wrong story gets believed.

Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 12:34:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Tue 27-Aug-13 12:35:18

You MUST put in a formal grievance against this awful woman. She is having a detrimental affect on your professional appearance both as an individual and a company. The bit about being banned from press events because of her behaviour around celebrities is just obscene! I can't believe she hasn't been fired already.

Don't take this lying down. Stand up for yourself and keep talking to your boss. HR cannot refuse to deal with this. I suggest writing a formal letter.

Would ACAS be an appropriate place to seek advice?

comingalongnicely Tue 27-Aug-13 13:30:30

I would also suggest you raise an appeal or grievance against the disciplinary you received.

If it was due to a colleague accosting you in front of clients then it's not your fault!

Good Luck

Groovee Tue 27-Aug-13 13:34:27

I would call ACAS for some advice.

limitedperiodonly Tue 27-Aug-13 13:52:10

All I have said I front of clients is 'i don't know what your talking about L but this isn't the time/place.

If that's really all you said in front of clients you should not be disciplined. Did you say the other things? Who's saying you did?

Your HR department appears confused as to their job. This is exactly what they should be doing. Go back and point that out.

Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 14:04:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Peachy Tue 27-Aug-13 14:07:26

Agree with limited.

HR should also be helping you with the SEN child, depending on the level of SEN: we have children with autism and certainly HR have been able to help us work with this in the past, if you are a Carer you have certain rights.

Given that, I would certainly recommend ACAS and I wish you luck.

Lampshadeofdoom Tue 27-Aug-13 14:10:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

quesadilla Tue 27-Aug-13 14:14:12

Call ACAS but I would also recommend going to talk to a lawyer if you can afford it, even just for one session (some lawyers wil offer initial consultations at low rates) to see what your rights are.

I would also put something in writing, very respectfully and professionally, stating that you are blameless in this incident, that you want this to go down on your employment record and that if any further action takes place on the part of your employer which implicates you in this situation you will take legal action.

limitedperiodonly Tue 27-Aug-13 14:21:51

That sounds awful. Your boss sounds like a bad manager and a coward who doesn't want to tackle the problem.

Talk to HR. This is exactly their job. I'd be worried that it would be a formal warning. Even if not, it won't solve the problem. She won't accept any responsibility and will carry on behaving badly.

Something very similar happened to me but at least it wasn't a formal warning and there were lots of us roped in to share the blame because my manager couldn't face dealing with it properly.

BashfulBunny Tue 27-Aug-13 14:29:58

What a nasty situation. I think your boss is being lazy. It does not give a professional impression to unfairly discipline a member of staff. If he is worried what clients think then he should be making sure he deals with it transparently and properly - and that is not the same as being heavy handed. If a client came to your defense then they are not going to be impressed with your boss either.

Don't just take it. A disciplinary will go on your HR record and could affect your next job.

You should be being vindicated, she should be put on review.

Agree about contacting ACAS. Sounds like you need some support since HR have forgotten their jobs.

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