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To ask for Perimenopausal horror stories and ask if there's any respite?

(199 Posts)
celestialbows Tue 27-Aug-13 10:57:02

We touched on this subject in the hideous wedding story thread and I think that the responses and shared experiences warrant their own thread.

I believe that I started perimenopause 5 years ago aged 35. My periods became heavy and erratic. I was ttc and the only solution GPs could offer for the erratic bleeding was to put me on the pill.
Luckily I saw an amazing locum who referred me to the fertility clinic and I now have two beautiful children.

Since having the kids my cycle has got worse, periods are either really late or bunched together. I have embarrassing flooding, crazy mood swings, inappropriate crying at work and in public places as well as 'middle aged spread' dry hair and skin (dry everywhere...) and the list goes on.
Once again the. surgery has been unsupportive, my GP says that I'm too young for menopause and I'm only presenting with PMT and it is the same for all women!

I resorted to private hormone testing which showed that my oestrogen is persistently low. The GPs won't acknowledge the tests as they are notoriously unreliable and have offered me anti Depressants and the pill to counteract the mood swings and irregular cycle.

Has anyone else tried these methods and found them helpful or do you have any experience of other things which helped you?

Please wade in with your tales and help me to see I'm not alone!

emmelinelucas Thu 05-Sep-13 16:42:37

I just wanted to let my friends on here know that I have posted in employment issues about a problem at work since i started with the flushes (the only outward sign I have)
I cant link, im sorry
But I am so cross and yes- emotional.

emmelinelucas Thu 05-Sep-13 17:11:17

I will try to link

emmelinelucas Thu 05-Sep-13 17:12:08

It wont work . Ignore it. sorry blush

celestialbows Fri 06-Sep-13 08:30:11

emmelinelucas I read your thread on the other boards. Your boss has been horrible and you should flag this up with hr / personnel or a union to ensure that people know what you are going through in case anything else happens with your boss.

celestialbows Fri 06-Sep-13 08:30:48

I have received an email reply from the practice Manager to my letter yesterday. She said that the GPs involved have been sent a copy of my email and will be given a chance to reply in line with their complaint procedure.

I thanked her for this and asked how long it might take for a referral!

I have saved another complaint about inappropriate behaviour /comments from my GP as I wanted my hormones letter to be as concise as possible but if I receive an unhelpful reply I will wheel out this secondary complaint!

Nanny0gg Sat 07-Sep-13 00:20:53

Try that.

TheConstantLurker Tue 10-Sep-13 10:29:07

Hi, I just started a new relationship after years of no sex and am having a nightmare time with any sexual activity causing soreness, swelling and thrush symptoms. I'm 50.
What is the best way to get it sorted, doctor, pharmacist or just some cream or gel from Boots?

Lazysuzanne Tue 10-Sep-13 10:36:38

I have found biofem very useful for sex induced soreness, not sure if it would be the complete solution for you but it is very soothing to the area

TheConstantLurker Tue 10-Sep-13 12:20:38

Aha. Is it available in Boots?

Lazysuzanne Tue 10-Sep-13 16:08:57

yes, I've bought it in boots
I dont know if some sort of prescription estrogen cream would also be a thing to go for but I think biofem is very good for fortifying your delicate area's grin

MardyBra Tue 10-Sep-13 17:35:16

Have anyone's feet got bigger in the menopause. My shoes have been feeling tight?

MardyBra Tue 10-Sep-13 17:35:40

I have also lost the ability to place question marks in the correct place.

Impomea Tue 10-Sep-13 17:50:34

What about clumsiness and curly hair or is it just me?
I am 50 and have no other symptoms and definately no mood swings (lie)

TheConstantLurker Tue 10-Sep-13 22:56:50

Ordered biofem off amazon.
No to bigger feet.
Grey hair though with frizzy pube-like bits at the sides.
Chin hair. I would look like the cliched witch if I didn't pluck em.
No period now for 6 weeks.
Have had night sweats though they have stopped.

BigBoobiedBertha Wed 11-Sep-13 09:09:16

Mardy - my feet got bigger when I was pregnant and haven't ever got smaller again. I think the extra weight spread them blush I really don't want to be getting any bigger so I hope it is just you. (Was a 7, now 7.5 to 8)

Could your shoe size increase be the result of a bit of extra fluid retention? Or could it be that after a summer of sandals you have started wearing shoes again and they feel tight because you aren't used to them or because they have shrunk a tiny bit through lack of use. I know I always find that with the first wearing of leather shoes after a long break.

BigBoobiedBertha Wed 11-Sep-13 09:15:41

Impomea - I don't have curly hair yet but I was wondering if that was coming. I had curly hair at birth, it was straight after my first hair cut and stayed that way until puberty and then was curly for 10 years before going straight again and remaining that way from my mid 20's. I reckon it goes curly with big hormone changes and know a couple of people who have gone curly later in life.

I await the next stage with interest.

Impomea Wed 11-Sep-13 11:12:18

BBB -I have had dead straight hair all my life .It's been really short for about 20 years.Decided to grow it and can't believe it's now curly. It looks quite nice actually from the back!

KatyPutTheCuttleOn Wed 11-Sep-13 13:29:36

Annoyingly, mine has gone curly at the front but the rest has stayed straight. I now have to curl it all or straighten it all.

luccamum Wed 11-Sep-13 13:36:43

Hi, longtime lurker here, but I had to post on this thread.
Have always had long heavy periods, and in my 20's had some truly gruesome ones and since my early 30's my hormone levels have been up and down like yo-yo's. Wasn't really looking forward to the perimenopause, but hoped that maybe things would just sort of peter out and then stop.
No such luck. At first my periods did seem to get lighter and more spaced out, but for the last year they have been all over the place, two months, three months, six months, then 2 in 3 weeks!
And the flooding...........
No rhyme or reason, can happen on Day 1, day 3, day 10.
Today is day 2, haven't had a period for 3 months, came on yesterday just as I was going to work - thanks a bunch, not too bad, but today its awful, super tampons last 45 mins if I'm lucky and the washing machine has already been on twice. Not surprisingly I'm not at work, my boss is understanding, but I don't get any sick pay so I can't afford to do this very often.
Been to see the GP, had blood tests, been told I'm normal and that they will stop in time....
If men suffered from this they would have found a "cure" for sure!

mankyscotslass Wed 11-Sep-13 13:44:15

I'm 43, and I think peri-menopausal.

I'm having hot flushes, usually in the evening or just before I fall asleep, I am really tired all the time and my periods are changing from every 29 days to anything between 21-35 days. They have always been heavy and painful, but the flooding is worse now.

I have poor short term memory and my sweat is smelly now, which it never really was before. Lovely. hmm

I'm debating whether to just wait it out or go and get checked at the doctors.

My mum said by 47 she had been through it all and come out the other side a new woman....only four more years to wait. confused

mkmjimmy Wed 11-Sep-13 14:54:45

Hi Manky. If you are flooding and the tiredness is getting worse I'd say yes go and get checked out - it could save you years of 'putting up with it'. You might be low in iron because of the bleeding which can usually be quickly fixed - ask for a blood test. Ask about HRT - helped me with hot flushes, night sweats and all the other yummy stuff. It might suit you - it really helped me. Still not a barrel of laughs - get very down from hormones - but a lot of the other symptoms have been managed.

mankyscotslass Wed 11-Sep-13 15:49:54

Thank you - I need to book in for a smear so may as well do it then. I can't remember the last time I went to the doctor for myself!

gnushoes Thu 12-Sep-13 09:28:11

Just found this thread -- oh joy.
Can I contribute awful sore vulva which is really affecting my quality of life. Even on ovestin I'm sitting on a U-shaped cushion to work, swimming causes awful problems and can only run if things are going well. 52, and this started with a bang earlier in the year. Still having (wonky) periods, and get very cold.

GoingGoingGoth Fri 13-Sep-13 23:51:20

Another one here grateful for this thread. I'm 43 but DM was in her 50's when she hit the menopause so I thought I had years to go, but reading these symptoms I'm now pretty sure I'm going through it.

PMT is a killer, I'm either weepy or such a bitch to DH.
Periods are erratic and I thought I was imagining the flooding. And so painful
I get so hot at night, in Scotland so it's not due to the weather

Am due my smear next week, so will ask about the blood test then

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