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to not want to go to an Indian resteraunt while suffering horrendous 'morning' (haha) sickness

(144 Posts)
Makqueen Mon 26-Aug-13 11:28:59

Dh parents arrived today. They love an Indian resteraunt near us and want to eat there everytime they visit. I usually love it too (I am half Indian but a crap cook so it's like a taste of childhood going there).

However, I am 9 weeks pregnant and puking round the clock. The only things I can eat (this week) are soggy cornflakes and for the past two days I am having trouble keeping anything down, sometimes even fluids.

I can't open my own fridge without gagging so the thought of sitting there smelling all those spices is filling me with dread.

I've told dh to go on his own with them tonight, but he won't as the evenings is when my sickness spikes (I passed out on the bathroom floor thur night), but I am gettin guilt tripped by all of them. They say they will miss out if we don't all go and won't get a takeaway as its not the same.

I don't want to ruin thier trip, but I can't go. They are saying I can just nibble on some rice. It's the smell, and the fact that I am exhausted and can't keep anything down.

The resteraunt only has one loo and I don't want to be hogging it.

God, I feel like shit and just want to sleep!

PrincessFlirtyPants Wed 28-Aug-13 21:09:00

Yes, Makqueen are you feeling any better?

Has 'D'MIL stayed the fuck away today?!

Hope DH is still being supportive

tinypumpkin Wed 28-Aug-13 21:07:15

How are you doing today? I do hope your DH has had words with his DM, she is unbelievable. Truly.

Hope you are doing better today.

Loobylou123 Wed 28-Aug-13 14:39:09

So glad that you're feeling better and that DH has come around for you grin

SparkyTGD Wed 28-Aug-13 10:21:39

Good to hear Mak

MIL sounds a proper pain

LadyClariceCannockMonty Wed 28-Aug-13 08:18:51

Glad you're feeling better, OP, and also that DH shows some signs of getting his act together! thanks

IJustNeedANap Tue 27-Aug-13 20:17:50

Glad your home OP and you've got rid of the ILs for the night.

My MIL was abit similar, when PG I got admitted to hospital and she tried to talk me out of going then I got admitted and she texted the next morning basically saying "see I told you it was a waste of time going and it would be fine" p, she didn't know they admitted me and when I texted back telling her she soon STFU. I hope your DH keeps supporting you thanks

GnocchiGnocchiWhosThere Tue 27-Aug-13 20:13:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ems1910 Tue 27-Aug-13 19:06:39

Glad you are ok and are on some meds for your uti and sickness! Take care x

Glad they have gone too! ;)

Makqueen Tue 27-Aug-13 18:56:40

Hi, I'm ok thanks. I was discharged at 5, on anti biotics still but they let me come home. Got some anti sickness meds (took one at 4pm but got sick about half an hour go).

In laws are not here thank god. In bed with the laptop and dh is cleaning the house!

ems1910 Tue 27-Aug-13 18:28:17

How are you now Makqueen?

Mumsyblouse Tue 27-Aug-13 12:08:56

My IL's are really similar to this, down to similar episodes, and the only way to cope is for you and your husband to be a very united front and spell out to them what you will and won't put up with. I am glad your husband is supporting you today but sorry it had to go this far to get them to understand you are his priority.

They won't change, they may even make ok grandparents (but you will have to make sure they look after the children properly as their needs will dominate there as well) but you will always know they are very selfish. So, from now on, you always have to ask yourself 'does this suit us?' 'what do we need from this situation' and put yourselves first with them, plus stick together.

They can moan from the sidelines but it won't be your concern.

CookieLady Tue 27-Aug-13 11:32:17

I'm pleased that your husband will be with you today. Your mil is a nasty piece of work. angry. You take care of yourself and focus on getting better. flowers

DrinaDancesInParis Tue 27-Aug-13 10:16:11

Sorry you are so poorly flowers

I'm glad your H has started to stick up for you a bit. Hope it continues.

I would stop engaging with her at all and let him deal with her- as long as he has his priorities straight.

I'd also be having a stern word with him that this kind of bollocks putting pressure on you for his parents' sake when you are ILL is NOT to happen again or divorce will be back on the cards.

TheBleedinObvious Tue 27-Aug-13 09:37:50

Omg! Just read some more of the thread!

I cannot believe they are being so horrible sad

Hope you feel better soon flowers

TheBleedinObvious Tue 27-Aug-13 09:34:23


I wouldn't even allow them to bring takeaway curry into the house!

Tell them to go without you and the subject is not up for discussion.

MaMattoo Tue 27-Aug-13 09:25:47

Yanbu at all. Sickness is not funny and if you are passing out then you do have a serious case of it.
Be polite but insist on staying back, if they then choose to not to, then it's their problem not yours.
Alas, this is the start of all the putting foot down business that comes with a baby!
And congratulations by the way!!! thanks

Makqueen Tue 27-Aug-13 09:19:01

Hi everyone, thank you for all the kind words and support. Am still in hospital, feeling ok and I got put in a side room, result! So I have managed to get some sleep. I'm feeling so much better already, I was really dehydrated.

Don't know when I will be discharged, depends on todays urine tests and blood tests, but hopefully I will be home by tonight.

I don't know what she was thinking with the text - I didn't reply and dh arrived back with my phone a while later so I am posting from that now. He was upset when I showed it to him, he called her and yes, she thought I was faking to get out of spending time with them.

Quite where she got that from I don't know, I have always bent over backwards for them. The only thing I can think of is that they have only seen me 'healthy' once this year. The other times I was pregnant the first time from end of Jan, then was told about the mmc, then had the miscarriage and was ill in the aftermath. Now I am sick again so maybe that it, but none of that was my fault or under my control so I can't see how they could hold it against me.

Honestly, I'd have to be a pretty good actress to score a hospital admission, that's really stung.

Dh stayed with me until 8 last night and then went home to bed, they went out by themselves. He's asked them to stay in a b&b round the corner tonight (we are paying) as we live in a tiny flat and they are staying in ds room while he is at his dads house. I've posted about it on here before its very small and impossible to rest when there are people staying.

They actually understood though, once dh had told them how bad I was and that I would be kept n last night and posibly tonight too. I really don't want to return home to a mess and other people's stuff everywhere.

Dh is obviously coming here to the hospital today and he text this morning to say she'd been a bit of an arse about that too - she assumed that as I was in hospital, he would spend the whole day going out with them as he has the week off work. He did put his foot down and told them he was going to be at the hospital with me today.

I am still incredibly pissed off at her attitude and lack of any compassion, especially with regard to today - surely any husband would be at the hospital.

mumtorobbie Tue 27-Aug-13 08:20:44

Get yourself down to the docs ASAP OP.

I had dreadful morning sickness and cyclazine was the only thing that got me through.

hackmum Tue 27-Aug-13 07:51:48

They obviously think you're a drama queen, with your showy-off morning sickness and urine infection that requires hospitalisation.

Seriously, though, they do sound like horrible people, and I felt very sad reading this thread. If they're like this now, I don't suppose they're going to get better when the baby's born. I hope you feel better soon and can work things out with your DH - he sounds like he needs taking firmly in hand.

Fionnabhair Tue 27-Aug-13 01:02:39

Go and puke in their food. They'll soon learn to not underestimate the effect smells can have when pregnant and won't be so dismissive in future.

MidniteScribbler Mon 26-Aug-13 23:22:01

I'm not usually someone who jumps on the LTB bandwagon, but I would be having a serious think about my relationship my husband hadn't immediately kicked my MIL out the door after a text like that and told her not to come back.

Nanny0gg Mon 26-Aug-13 22:47:47

AintNobodyGotTimeFerThat You might want to read the rest of the OP's posts - it's gone a wee bit past worrying about the restaurant...

Dancergirl Mon 26-Aug-13 22:37:21



OP, how are you feeling today? I really feel for you. I wish you a speedy recovery and hope the rest of the pregnancy is easier xx

AintNobodyGotTimeFerThat Mon 26-Aug-13 22:30:21

Oh and just ignore the woman -

In my experience life is too short to worry about an ignorant woman's attitudes and what she thinks of you.

She'll think bad of you if she wants to and positively of you as long as you aren't overtly nasty and I don't see any of that in your OP.

AintNobodyGotTimeFerThat Mon 26-Aug-13 22:29:27

No, I think you're at perfect liberty to decline.

Even after I got past the morning sickness stage, which took til about week 22 I went to an indian restaurant and ended up throwing my guts up outside about 10 minutes later whilst waiting for the taxi (just glad it was not in the taxi, otherwise I'd have got a hefty bill).

I felt very embarrassed though.

The only other thing is to perhaps go for the socialising and eat somewhere else first and perhaps just have a poppadum or two.

But that would seem pointless to me.

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