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Was I BU to challenge friend on FB who made horribly prejudiced comment and photo posting?

(104 Posts)
coffeeandcream Wed 21-Aug-13 18:42:35

An acquaintance on FB surreptitiously took a photo of a very overweight lady sitting opposite him across two seats on the morning commute and captioned the photo with "Fat tax for rush hour trains?!"

I commented on his photo and horrid opinion saying "there ought to be a 'dislike' button on FB, there's no need to be so rude".

He posted a reply which he later deleted asking if the lady in his photo was a friend of mine and there was no need for me to "get all high and mighty". Then he posted that he agreed there should be a dislike FB button for photos that we're disgusting ie the lady in the picture.

I was so angry, poor woman minding her own business on her way to work being secretly photographed and humiliated on FB. BTW, I've no idea who the woman was, but I feel that disgusting attitudes like this need to be challenged as silence in the face of this kind of prejudice just condones it in my view.

Just needed to vent. Going to 'unfriend' the bastard angry

CatelynStark Thu 22-Aug-13 09:56:15


BeCool Thu 22-Aug-13 09:56:38

YANBU - your friend is an a-hole.
But you know that.

PleasePudding Thu 22-Aug-13 10:01:54

My brother in law takes surreptitious photos and seems to think its fine - seriously why? I fucking hate it. I hate that one which is all local on FB and you shame people and I hate creep shots - yes of course if you are in public you can have your photo taken but to do it without consent is extremely discourteous and to be mocked or perved over is loathsome.

What is wrong with people that they think such cruelty is ok.

mignonette Thu 22-Aug-13 10:09:09

My children/stepchildren know never to photograph me if they plan to FB the picture. I refuse to have anything to do with it. FB is for kids.

Misspixietrix Thu 22-Aug-13 10:13:29

Photos in Public are not Fair game. I know the two excuses used and they wouldnt hold much weight against someone who will one day have the funds to Lawyer up against this type. One the press excuse is Stupid. The Press even pixalate out photos of people Who's permission they do not have. A little something called the Data Protection Act they have to comply with. Before I also get the 'but cctv does this' line too. No they dont. Cctv images are to captured to be used in a Court of Law for Evidence for the Prevention of.Crime not for the purposes of being smashed all over Facebook! There is a world of difference between somebody innocently Taking a photo of someone in the background and not getting their permission beforehand and secretly taking photos to upload on to a networking site ~

AKAK81 Thu 22-Aug-13 11:59:06

Photographers are free to use photos taken in public however they wish including for commercial gain.

SunshineMMum Thu 22-Aug-13 12:03:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Thu 22-Aug-13 12:09:32

Photos in public... well, not something I can realistically be up in arms about in the age of digital camera, CCTV and mobile phone cameras.

However, photos taken for the purpose of mocking someone on a global platform is cruel, unnecessary, and clearly the mark of a total cock.

AKAK81 Thu 22-Aug-13 12:17:34

Its not really mocking though is it? Its a factual demonstration of a good point.

Feminine Thu 22-Aug-13 12:32:03

AKA really

fackinell Thu 22-Aug-13 12:35:09

How creepy and disgusting!! That poor woman. Yes, I'd delete him, I hate being photographed and uploaded without permission. I have a tag filter for this reason (not that it helps this poor lady or others in her situation.)

I'm hating FB ATM and thinking of deleting it. Ive not seen any nasty RL photos like some of the others but there is a Muslim hating, supermarket one is doing the rounds right now (you can tell it's purely a made up scenario.) It makes my blood boil!! Some people just love to breed hatred. angry

SunshineBossaNova Thu 22-Aug-13 12:37:06

YANBU at all.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit Thu 22-Aug-13 12:38:34

Doesn't matter if he has a legal right to take the photos. He shouldn't have taken it then posted on the internet for the sole purpose of mocking her. It might be legal, but you have to a vile human being to think it's OK.

Report and unfriend. What a total bastard.

AKAK81 Thu 22-Aug-13 12:43:18

Really it does illustrate the point quite well. Its not like its picking on them for the sake of it. I could understand it if it was a ginger person and the comment was 'how about a ginger tax' as hair colour has no impact on anyone else however a fat person taking 2 seats on a packed commuter train does impact other people in the same way as someone taking up a second seat with a bag.

AKAK81 Thu 22-Aug-13 12:44:31

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

TheVermiciousKnid Thu 22-Aug-13 12:45:05

Oh dear. AKAK81, you come across as rather unpleasant.


OKnotOK Thu 22-Aug-13 12:45:40

This is one of the main reasons im not on Facebitch.
There are enough dickheads to piss me off in everyday life, i really dont need to go looking for more online.

He sounds like an utter prick.

OKnotOK Thu 22-Aug-13 12:48:31



Sanctimummy Thu 22-Aug-13 12:51:06

Please don't report it, there are far worse things on Fb that DO need reporting. Unfortunately when someone takes offence to something so minor and reports it, it takes up valuable time of the people sifting through the reports stopping them getting to the really important stuff that needs attention fast.

I read about a moderator who got to a report from a young girl who said her uncle was abusing her and had put pictures of her on his facebook, and could he please help her and also remove the pictures. She said that he was coming over again at 2pm. He didn't get to her report until after 5pm.

doormat Thu 22-Aug-13 12:54:11

Yanbu i dont agree with these taking pics without ppls consent n posting them on fb

zatyaballerina Thu 22-Aug-13 12:55:50

yanbu, report the photo and report his account as abusive. There really needs to be a law governing the use of photos that are used to invade, abuse and humiliate people on social media. The technology we have now requires the law catch up to the 21 century to protect peoples privacy and dignity from this type of gross invasion.

saintlyjimjams Thu 22-Aug-13 12:57:33

AKA - go & lie down dear, you're coming across all unnecessary. Of course taking a photo of someone minding their own business in order to mock them on FB is indefensible. It's um, obvious.

Frankly, AKAK, you sound like a bully. Vile, horrible people like you are why I have depression and am suicidal.

If I saw a picture like that, and those sorts of comments, it would probably push me over the line from thinking about suicide to doing it.

But you would think that was funny too, wouldn't you? You arse.

mignonette Thu 22-Aug-13 13:05:56

Just <<ugh>> at imagining the inadequate creatures who either do this or think that is it an appropriate way to deal with a grievance whether legitimate or not. I imagine the kind of person who also supports bomb threats to those they feel threatened by?

angry that these inadequates appear to be on this thread too.

AKAK81 Thu 22-Aug-13 13:15:53

I really see no issues. Its stating the bleeding obvious. As far as all this hand wringing and reporting to FB you all need to get a grip.

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