to be weary of setting up a fb account, due to people boasting and bullshitting

[whiteandyellowiris]

and the potential awkwardness of when people who are not really your friends, try to friend you


not had a fb account until now, ive seen what its all about though from friends, who have shown me theres etc

anytime someone says can I add you on fb or can I contact you on fb and I say, I don't have fb they look at me like I have 10 heads!

i have a feeling its full of bullshit and people boasting and at the school theres loads of mums that are friends, but they are not really and the amount of time i hear playground gossip about what people have posted on fb makes me really wary


what do you think?

[SalaciousBCrumb]

You don't want one, you don't need to have one.

Facebook is just a tool, you can make what you want with it - if you want hundreds of boasting bullshit filled friends, it's easy enough to achieve. On the other hand it's easy enough to only add people you're interested in, and defriend/hide the ones who turn out to be irritating.

[MalcolmTuckersMum]

I think you sound very tired. Or did you mean 'wary'? Anyway - it really is optional whether or not to have Facebook and if you do have it it's entirely up to you who you have as friends.

[ViviPru]

It's only full of bullshit if your friends are full of bullshit. I find FB is a convenient way to keep aware of what's going on in peoples lives and sharing photos. It's what you make of it really. But equally, you shouldn't feel obliged to sign up if you don't fancy it.

[ViviPru]

One mind, Selacious. One mind.

[Reality]

I think you are missing the point of FB spectacularly.

One person's 'boast' is another saner person's 'sharing news with family and friends'.

FB isn't compulsory but I do get weary of people who are wary of it because they dont' understand it.

Try it and see. Or don't. Whatever.

[Pagwatch]

Fb is a tool and it is up to you how you use it.
I have about 30 people on it . I have had almost zero boasting or bullshit.

If you end up with a fb full of boasting and bullshit it will because that's who you are friends with.

If someone suggests being friends and you don't want to just don't accept. If you feel you must accept then just hide them.

The people who endlessly complain about the hundreds of wankers on fb are just people with hundreds of wankers for friends.

[Groovee]

You don't need to have one. I find it great for keeping in contact with friends who now live further away and see their children growing up. Otherwise I doubt we'd take the time to write.

[Pagwatch]

X-posted with everyone.

[YouStayClassySanDiego]

I've never had a fb account , I don't think I've missed out on anything because of it.

If you don't think it's up your street then don't join even if your friends think you're bonkers not to.

Don't be a sheep.

[OneLittleToddleTerror]

It's just a communication tool. You don't have to check in and look at people's updates. You don't have to post updates yourself. It's very handy for keeping in touch with friends you don't talk to often however. Many people don't do emails anymore. They only use fb, twitter and linkedin. However, when they message you on these social networks, you get an email telling you you've got a new message. Then you can log in and reply.

[OneLittleToddleTerror]

Basically exactly what Groovee says. All the people I use fb to keep in touch with are my old friends from university. It's really nice to see their children on fb. And we occassionally message each other too. They are scattered all over the world so it's hard to visit them all!

[SuperiorCat]

What pag said.

Ratio of boasts to news depends on who you are friends with

[rainrainandmorerain]

You don't want a fb account? don't get one, that's fine!

If you are worried you are missing out on stuff by not having one (this is why people want to add you or contact you via fb?) then you can get an account, but it is ENTIRELY up to you how you use it.

MN seems to have a lot of women very worked up about x y and z on facebook, but they don't seem to be aware that they can control what they see (and can always ignore what they don't like anyway).

People use facebook in ALL sorts of different ways. It's just a tool, there's no wrong or right (well, unless you are makjng violent threats etc - and then that's the violent threats that are the problem, not the social media).

I think a lot of daft problems crop up because social media is still in its infancy, relatively speaking, and people struggle as a result. facebook 'Friends' is just a term, perhaps misleading - it doesn't mean at all you Re bestie mates with everyone you are facebook 'friends' with. Unless that's how you want it.

I think there can also be a gap between how someone is in rl and how they come across on fb - not because they are awful but just because it's a different medium from face to face communication. I know some people who are very quiet in rl and surprisingly vocal/articulate on fb. Some the other way round. I've been surprised to see people posting statuses about being unhappy etc when they come across as happy in rl (and a few times been very surprised and unfriended when people turned out to have racist views I had no idea about on the basis of a casual acquaintance).

Re: boasting and bullshitting - personally, I think the people who claim to see a lot of that stuff are either very very unlucky in their choice of friends, or go looking for it, tbh.

The short version is - it's entirelt up to you, but bear in mind that no social media is an exact 'mirror' of the world around you.

[Trills]

You only have to worry about boring status updates if you think you have boring friends.

HTH :)

[badguider]

If you're somebody who doesn't want to hear people's news and will dismiss any positive post as 'boasting' and any negative one as 'moaning' then maybe you're not the sort of person to get something out of joining facebook.
Same applies if you feel your friends are full of bullshit..

Personally I love it, but then I like hearing my friends' news and don't think any of them are boastful or full of bullshit. If I did they wouldn't be my friends in real life.

[Morgause]

I love FB. It's a great way to stay in touch with family and friends and hear their news.

I love seeing the holiday and graduation photos. It's not bosting to share these with friends who will be happy for you.

[thebody]

you are over thinking it. have one if you want one. don't if you don't. no one will really care that much anyway. it's not compulsory.

[MalcolmTuckersMistress]

I added a lady a few days ago who was selling something on a local page and I needed to pm her. I went to buy something from her, got home and decided to unfriend her again only to discover SHE GOT THERE FIRST! I was already unfriended. Outrageous!

[EllieQ]

As pp have said, you seem to be over-thinking this, when it really depends on what your friends are like! I find it a good way to keep in touch with family and friends who don't live nearby, so we don't see each other very often.

You can set it up so not all your friends see everything you post, and you can change which updates you see. The people who I'm friends with on FB can be split into these categories:

• actual friends
  
• family (including inlaws)
  
• work colleagues
  
• acquaintances (people I knew at school but haven't stayed friends with, people I don't know that well)
  

I've then set up lists so I can look at everyone's updates in my news feed, or just look at friends and family (which I normally do). I've set it up so my posts on FB can only be seen by friends & family unless I change the settings. You can also hide someone if you don't want to see their posts.

As rain says above, it's just a tool and can be used in different ways.

[Trinpy]

I'm not on fb but always wondered - don't people get offended if you don't accept their friend request?

[OneLittleToddleTerror]

trinpy but you don't have to reject friend request unless you really don't know them. EllieQ demonstrated exactly how it's done.

[OneLittleToddleTerror]

They aren't all supposed to be your bestie mates, like someone has said. I have people I used to play warcraft with on my friends list, for example.