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Urinals. What the actual fuck are they all about?

(47 Posts)
Reality Wed 07-Aug-13 11:36:12

Just been reading on FB about my local shopping centre, it's grim. You step out of the lifts into the miasmic stench from the loos.

I hadn't really given it much thought, but apparently (and DH has just confirmed this), the mens urinal is a fucking grate to stand on and then a gutter to piss in.

What the hell? That is barbaric! No wonder it stinks to high heaven. Apparently that's normal for public loos? I thought urinals were individual flushable things.

I am really properly dicusted of tunbridge wells about this and tempted to not let DS1 go in there ever again, he can go in the ladies where it smells of air freshener and soap. Except he's nearly 11 and people woudl freak.

Why on earth, in the developed world and the twenty first century, do men have to piss down a gutter in the floor? I might start a campaign.

MinnieBar Thu 08-Aug-13 19:39:05

I once viewed a house that had a toilet in the bedroom - an in-suite rather than en-suite, if you will.

And they'd actually removed the dividing wall - it used to be separate confused hmm

(We didn't buy it)

CelticPromise Thu 08-Aug-13 19:29:08

I went to China when I was younger and I mastered the art of communal evacuation over a hole in the ground. I remember being in a shed with about six pits and a woman came in, squatted down and started reading the newspaper grin It wasn't like that everywhere, just the really backstreet places in the cities.

celticclan Thu 08-Aug-13 19:20:58

I was concerned that at 8 years ds still preferred to pee sitting down then dh reassured me that he sometimes pees sitting down too.

Urinals are grim. Why can't they use individual toilets like women. Who wants to do it alongside other people?

missrlr Thu 08-Aug-13 17:09:22

I think all men should sit down to piss. Standing up, they seem to get it everywhere. What's the big deal with men not sitting down to wee?


Morestheshame Thu 08-Aug-13 17:00:09

I think all men should sit down to piss. Standing up, they seem to get it everywhere. What's the big deal with men not sitting down to wee?

SwedishEdith Thu 08-Aug-13 16:54:32

No, just a normal bathroom with a urinal as well. Just on the wall. The ownere had 2 sons - maybe she was pissed off (hur hur) with them missing the toiler bowl or something?

TabithaStephens Thu 08-Aug-13 16:49:05

Why would you have an urinal in the bathroom if presumably there was a proper toilet in there as well? Or was the toilet in a seperate rroom?

SwedishEdith Thu 08-Aug-13 16:45:05

I viewed a house once that had a proper urinal in the bathroom. The owner seemed surprised that I was surrpised

I like that story about the bee grin

OnIlkelyMoorBahtat Thu 08-Aug-13 16:26:22

Thank you magimedi, it really pleased me when I found it out!

magimedi Thu 08-Aug-13 16:19:33


That is the best piece of trivia I have ever read!

flowers (Wish I could put a bee in the bunch grin )

OnIlkelyMoorBahtat Thu 08-Aug-13 16:06:49

Re the bumblebees on the urinal as a target in Holland. They also put them on toilets and chamberpots in Victorian England. And do you know why they chose a bumblebee?

Because the latin for bee is "apis" [beams with pleasure at finally being able to put this piece of trivia to use!]

3birthdaybunnies Thu 08-Aug-13 15:43:43

Dd2 has a bladder like a leaky sieve so is an expert in assessing both male and female toilets, and assures me that the girls are almost always better. The ones in France though are equally grim, unless you pay - and even that is no guarantee. Have our shewee this year so hoping will get us out of a few tricky ones.

lola88 Thu 08-Aug-13 15:34:06

My part time job is cleaning in a pub when i do the mens loo's (eww) i often pity my poor son than one day he will be expected to pee in there! I've actually stood wondering how long i can possibly take him to the ladies for... though in all honestly the ladies are actually dirtier than the mens in general believe it or not

TabithaStephens Thu 08-Aug-13 14:52:01

How about this:

Whothefuckfarted Thu 08-Aug-13 13:48:26

A bit like this? Haha...

jamdonut Thu 08-Aug-13 12:49:11

The urinals in the boys loos at school (primary) are like a stainless steel ''wall'' with a "gutter" at the bottom. The boys are terrors when peeing (if not at each other hmm,and the urinal regularly gets blocked by little darlings who think it is funny to block it with paper towels. YUK!

And of course, the cleaners are not allowed to use bleach, these days, only some ineffectual cleaning stuff that just doesn't get rid of the smell. I think it is ridiculous!

Binkyridesagain Thu 08-Aug-13 12:39:22 At least they look nice.

GetStuffezd Thu 08-Aug-13 12:37:24

I have seen a pic on a friend's phone of a delightful urinal in France shaped like a woman's open mouth, complete with red lipstick. Lovely, non?

And I would happily stab the wankers who used to shit in urinals where I used to work. (Pub)

TheFuzz Thu 08-Aug-13 12:31:29

Mens toilets are disgusting in the main. All down to a few folk that pee all over. The floors are usually swimming ! You can judge an establishment by the quality of it's loos. If you get a nice urinal that's clean, the place is dry, then you are lucky. Troughs or gutters are still very common.

BaronessBomburst Thu 08-Aug-13 11:46:29

CoffeeandScones I'm in Holland and the above mentioned urinals that I like to clean do indeed have bees on them. grin

SoldAtAuction Wed 07-Aug-13 12:58:51

When I was about 4, my brother was 2, and we were at Sunday school. My brother needed to go for a pee, so he asked me to take him, as he wasn't strong enough to open the bathroom door.
We got there, and I was going to just take him to the ladies, but he insisted he had to use the men's room, so I took him in. He went to use the urinal, and I freaked out! I thought he was peeing in a sink, and I started threatening to tell on him. blush grin
As I was hollering at him, a man walked in, and shooed me out, while reassuring my brother that he fine.
I went and told my mum, who just about died laughing!

ImNotBloody14 Wed 07-Aug-13 12:43:31

those urinal blocks are vile! all they do is collect urine and stop it all getting flushed away.

wanderings Wed 07-Aug-13 12:23:03

Also the blue "toss blocks" (I kid you not!) are not good for the plumbing, because they dissolve and re-solidify in the waste pipes.

wanderings Wed 07-Aug-13 12:21:49

"Oh pull yourself together, it's only a bit of poo."

(Johnny English, crawling up the waste pipe while a communal pooing session is in place further up)

CoffeeandScones Wed 07-Aug-13 12:19:48

(Btw blue loo blocks are a terrible idea, because we aim at them to make them move about in the urinal - sad but true

I feel like I'm giving away trade secrets here :-) )

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