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To be annoyed about friend's behaviour?

(55 Posts)
Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 16:45:04

Regular, name changed.

This has been praying on my mind for a few weeks. Went for a bottle or two glass of wine at friends, there was a group of us there who get together on a regular basis....with kids/without/with husbands etc.

Having a lovely time, chatting, laughing etc. one of our friends wasn't there, let's call her A. Friend B and I were having a dance. I stupidly asked her something that had been on my mind nosey for a while.

I asked friend B why she goes round to Bs in the day for alchol with Dcs in tow......because I did this with A and B once and did not enjoy it. I couldn't relax, the Dcs did quite a bit of damage.....let DS's pet rat out.....weed on DS (9) Lego collection and broke models up. Also, they are quite open about the Dcs running riot, getting out of the house etc while they drink. The Dcs are 5.

I know I shouldn't of said it but was curious. Anyway B was livid, ranted on and on.... Shouted at me when I tried to calm her down then when I burst into tears she said say thank you when she comforted me..... I was a bit taken back and felt uncomfortable so didn't say anything, she then repeated sternly say thank you... I did.

Aibu to be angry and find the thank you think odd?

Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 17:05:40

loopla I didn't think she'd bat an eyelid. <naive>

Vivacia Sat 03-Aug-13 17:06:19

"I did speak to them about the Dcs behaviour."

I was wondering if you asked about their arrangements because there were still things left unsaid from the havoc they caused at yours. Why had this been praying on your mind do you think?

Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 17:08:00

viva I don't think so. I think it's because I don't get it.

LineRunner Sat 03-Aug-13 17:11:27

How did your house and stuff get trashed at A's house?

Vivacia Sat 03-Aug-13 17:12:48

Didn't you understand it in some way to have taken part previously?

imademarion Sat 03-Aug-13 17:13:49

This entire series of posts is why I no longer drink.

Weed on Lego? What larks.

xylem8 Sat 03-Aug-13 17:15:19

Have I got this right? So, the first time they all came round to yours, you served them drink(?)or they brought drink and everyone got pissed , your house got trashed and you didn't like it.Then next time the 2 of them did it without you, and you asked them why?

1)a 5 yr old should know better than to piss over somebody else's lego and let their pets out whether or not they are b eing supervised.Maybe they were acting out, because they were frightened by their mums being drunk (and possibly loud)

2) If you have been involved with it once, I think it is a bit rich to then call them on it.

3) I can understand whu she cried but have absolutely no idea why you had to thank her.

you all sound a bit bonkers to me!

BeKindToYourKnees Sat 03-Aug-13 17:17:03

Tired and emotional, OP?

MonstrousPippin Sat 03-Aug-13 17:17:11

I don't know what you expected her to say to the question of why.

Surely the only reason why she'd continue to meet up for a drink with A is because she enjoys it, unless you thought you were going to get some elaborate blackmail plot that forces B to drink wine with A with her DC there?

Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 17:29:55

Nope I don't understand...because I didn't enjoy it. I wasnt calling her out on it...just stupid curious.

Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 17:31:04

Ha monstrous who knows?

Obviouslyanamechange Sat 03-Aug-13 17:32:05

Have Mners gleaned enough info to give the verdict?

Vivacia Sat 03-Aug-13 17:48:23

I can understand why you didn't enjoy it (we're another alcohol-free household) but you must have some insight in to the attraction 'cos you did it at least once. What got you to try it?

scarletforya Sat 03-Aug-13 17:58:24

Sounds like she felt judged and felt you were trying to rub it in about the previous episode I reckon.

ENormaSnob Sat 03-Aug-13 18:01:31

I blame wendy.

DoJo Sat 03-Aug-13 19:01:15

Presumably if you were drunk enough to ask her a question which could really only have had one answer, she was drunk enough to respond in a way that was a bit OTT and weird. Perhaps you both need to recognise that sharing after drinking doesn't work for either of you and just start afresh!

Oblomov Sat 03-Aug-13 19:06:56

Op is clearly deluded. She said ' I didn't call her on it, I was just curious'.
Er no, you did call her on it, in a really judgemental way. How you can not see this, is beyond me.

Oblomov Sat 03-Aug-13 19:11:26

They were drinking at your house. Their kids misbehaved and you didn't like it. But you were drinking too. Not as much as them. 2 glasses, instead of 2 bottles. But you still drank.
And then on top of all of this, the WAY you asked her ' why are you still doing this , when it was do shit when we did it'.
You sound like a complete nutter.
And yes , I drink , with my nursery mum friends , at lunchtime , whilst having 6 kids jumping in and out of paddling pool etc.
I certainly wouldn't invite you again. You sound like a snobby judgemental bore.

ThePowerof3 Sat 03-Aug-13 19:17:06

It reads to me like the pet rat weed on OPs DS rather than the friends DCs pissing on lego

candycoatedwaterdrops Sat 03-Aug-13 19:22:54

I have no idea what this is thread about. Am I alone in this?

Nottalotta Sat 03-Aug-13 19:26:01

I think your friend was a bit wierd for demanding you thank her. people with small children often get drunk during the day while said children run riot??

FunLovinBunster Sat 03-Aug-13 19:28:40

I think you're all fucking nuts.

FunLovinBunster Sat 03-Aug-13 19:29:28

I am referring to OP and "friends"

FrancesDeLaTourCoughngIntoABin Sat 03-Aug-13 19:30:42

Oblomov, I thought you were coming out as B! grin

(or is it A...?)

Viviennemary Sat 03-Aug-13 19:33:06

You all sound a bit mad to me. Why not cut out the wine and stick to sparkling water and see if that improves things. If not time to call it a day with these friendships.

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