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To think you should stay with a lost child?

(141 Posts)
NarkyNamechanger Fri 02-Aug-13 13:27:44

So yesterday I took the DC to a local lake/woodland area for a walk. They took bikes and scooters and we've been lots of times always sticking to the man made path around the lake/trees. They go ahead but never too far or out of sight or off the path.

About half way round ds2 scoots ahead and stops outside the playground and cafe area where we were stopping for lunch. He turned around and because this bit is much busier, he couldn't see me. I could see him in the distance but he panicked and started crying.

I saw a lady walking her dog approach him and after about 10 seconds she carried on. I sped up and got to him. I asked him what the dog walker had said' which was to ask him why he was crying, ds2 had said he couldn't see his mum and she'd just said 'oh I'm sure she'll be along in a minute'. Granted I was and he was fine but still... Shouldn't you stay and comfort a lost child?


cushtie335 Fri 02-Aug-13 13:52:09

^I'd have stayed but I think people are often wary of approaching upset children nowadays, especially men sadly.

But just think if she had stayed, you'd probably be posting 'some woman was so judgey yesterday because my son couldn't see me for 30 seconds'^

That's more or less what I was thinking but you have articulated it for me smile

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 13:53:04

Perhaps she saw you coming along?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 13:53:47

... because if you could see her, surely she could see you?

Twirlyhot Fri 02-Aug-13 13:54:49

I've had a mouthful before from someone. When they've lost their child and find them crying and distressed with a stranger with large dogs apparently it's the dogs that are the problem confused. Those big dogs that are lying down. On leads.

maja00 Fri 02-Aug-13 13:55:00

I would have stayed, but he wasn't a toddler and was in a safe place so I don't think it was wrong of her to leave - she checked he wasn't hurt or in immediate danger.

NotYoMomma Fri 02-Aug-13 13:55:06

if you could see him and he wasnt that far away then surely you could have called out and waved.

her dog might be agressive, she might have just moved away but kept an eye from a distance?

you don't know

thebody Fri 02-Aug-13 13:56:53

god yes amazed posters saying they wouldn't.

if someone had stopped and asked why Jamie bugler was crying he would be alive today.

hasn't everyone at least once had that panicky feeling of loosing a child.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 13:57:37

I would satay with him, yes. I'm just wondering if she saw the OP coming

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 13:57:59

not satay , stay

cushtie335 Fri 02-Aug-13 13:59:32

Most people have said they WOULD stay, they're just not being judgey about the woman who didn't who could have any number of reasons for not doing so, one of the main ones being that she saw the child's mother approaching after all.

FannyMcNally Fri 02-Aug-13 13:59:39

I don't think at this age you would necessarily get a true version of everything that was exactly said, especially as how he was upset as well. She may have said, will you be all right? Shall I stay with you? etc.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 14:00:04

Blimey, buying your girlfriend's tampons would have been considered "modern" when i was a teen in the 1980s.

NarkyNamechanger Fri 02-Aug-13 14:00:22

I think it's the fact that she obviously cared enough to stop and ask but then not really do anything? Maybe her dog was aggressive I didn't think of that. And maybe she did watch from a distance.

I have since checked with ds2 that he would know what to do next (go into the cafe not take off looking for me).

And no he's not a toddler but is it really that sill that he cried? He is quite happy to be away from me but thinking you're lost is different, isn't it?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 14:00:25


cushtie335 Fri 02-Aug-13 14:01:29

Lolling at Jamie in the wrong thread, and a TAMPON one at that, hee hee.

Salmotrutta Fri 02-Aug-13 14:01:58

I stayed with a crying little boy once until his panicked mum and big brother came running up.

He had left a shop thinking they were outside too then got disorientated and upset.

He was doing that gulping, sobbing and lots of other people were just walking past hmm So I stood with him and talked to him, trying to find out which shop they had been in. At that point mum appeared thankfully!

And for the record, his mum thanked me profusely for standing with him.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 14:02:19

Course it's not silly a 7 year old cried.

NarkyNamechanger Fri 02-Aug-13 14:02:29


JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 02-Aug-13 14:03:25

cushtie grin

It's not the worst one I've done. I once typed 'Tis Pity She's A Whore. In a thread about a little girl

NarkyNamechanger Fri 02-Aug-13 14:04:01


cushtie335 Fri 02-Aug-13 14:06:11


Gruntfuttock Fri 02-Aug-13 14:09:51

OP, you think this woman was wrong for not staying with a child, but how about all the other people who didn't even talk to him? At least she showed concern and you don't know the precise conversation between her and your son so you are not in a position to judge her actions and find her wanting IMO.

thebody Fri 02-Aug-13 14:10:39


wierd that someone would think it was silly for a lost child to cry! he's 7.

dyslexicdespot Fri 02-Aug-13 14:10:53

I would like to raise my DS in a society where all adults concern themselves with the well being of all children, regardless of the child's age. I can't imagine leaving a distressed child alone.

maja00 Fri 02-Aug-13 14:11:05

She stopped and checked he wasn't injured and nothing bad had happened. When it turned out he'd just lost sight of his mum, and he was obviously in a safe place and she'd probably be along in a minute, the woman didn't feel it necessary to do much more.

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