...because, I really hate the neighbours kids.(13 Posts)
I feel quite bad about this, especially as this is my first ever Mumsnet post, but I'm really fed up.
We moved to a new area about four months ago, which is very different to the place we came from. We now live on a close which has a lot of other young families on it. Most of the kids are not a problem, but one in particular is really trying my patience.
We have two kids aged 8 and 10 and the girls next door are 9 and 11.
From the first day we came (they moved in the day before. Everyone is new here as it is a new development) they were climbing on the fence and looking in the garden, either from their garden or from our driveway, often standing on our bins. They knock the door several times a day to call for our kids, which is a big problem as my husband works from home.
They have lots of pets, an English Bull Terrier who doesn't get many walks, two cats and a rabbit and guinea pig who keep escaping into our garden. The dog also often goes on the run and when this happens they usually send one of our kids off to catch it, which I've told them repeatedly not to do. They ask for things almost on a daily basis. Calpol, headache tablets, ketchup, paper, pens, plant pots, you name it!
To be fair to the older girl, it is the nine year old who is the real problem, although both pretty much do as they please.
We've spoken to their mum about some of these things but she doesn't seem to have much control over them.
I feel like I'm being unreasonable, but we're getting very fed up with it all and are even wishing we hadn't moved here.
I'd love some impartial advise.
Can only sympathise. The kid next door is a permanent feature on our fence. Drives me nuts. She is only 3. I ignore and don't engage with her so that she gets the message. She yells out my sons name hundreds of times a day. The only thing that stops me telling her off is I feel sorry for her as mum is not much interested.
It'll only get worse once their teenagers
When they knock just say your DC can't come out to play...when they ask for stuff say you haven't got any and maybe after a while they will get bored and move on.
Cat's cant escape into your garden and I am amazed the guinea pig and rabbit wander about....really or are you just embellishing a bit? Maybe next the time dog runs off, just don't let your DC go after it...sounds like you are being amenable to them but just moaning afterwards. Take action now and refuse to do what they are asking.
What about the dad?? is she about? Maybe have a word with him if mum isn'treally taking an interest.
tell your children not to go after the dog and that you'll punish them if they do
tell the other children that they are not allowed to knock between the hours of x and y and/ or more than once a day and simply say no and close the door if they dont comply.
say no to every thing they ask for.
tell the mum that these are your rules and ask for her help in getting her children to respect them
and finally, be nice about it, theyre just kids. just be firm and assertive.
Thanks for your responses
To answer the questions; I didn't mean that the cats escaped into the garden! I know cats do as they please and I don't have a problem with them at all. As for the rabbit and guinea pig, I can assure you they have both ended up in my garden lots of times. Sometimes I have seen them myself and others I've had a knock at the door from one of the kids to ask me to look in the garden as one of them has escaped out of their run and gone through a hole on the fence. I've carried them both back myself a couple of times when they haven't even noticed they've gone missing!
They've also put them in a hutch together and the rabbit has attacked the guinea pig a few times. I've told them not to put them together as they don't get along but they don't bother. They just asked that if it got too badly injured could my husband take it to the vets for them!
To answer the other question, the dad is not with their mum any more and doesn't visit much. It's him who buys them all the pets.
Once again, thanks for the response.
I do feel bad for not liking the kids. I don't really hate them, in fact I feel sorry for them, which is why I've been a bit too soft and not complained too much. We really don't want to move as we are very happy here despite all this.
Fix the hole in the fence.
Don't let your children run after their dog.
Tell them you're not a taxi service.
Tell them not to knock - your children will be outside when they're allowed to play.
long time ago when I lived at home with my mum the girl next door had a trampoline and would bounce on it for hours.
not a problem you may think but on every up bounce she would look over our fence and shout hello.
and on and on and on..............
Im with nannyogg
Be nice but firm
And practice saying NO!
Put a note on the door saying do not disturb meeting in progress while hubby works?
Definitely keep saying no but agree a play date at a specific time each week. So Thursdays between 3 and 5.
The 9 year old is ild enough to know how to behave. Ask them nicely to get down from fence.
I do think you need to speak to the kids directly and explain that your OH works from home, and has a lot of important projects happening this summer.
You know they will totally understand, and things will need to be a bit different from now on. Lots of big smiles!
They need to let him have peace and quiet, so your kids will call for theirs instead, so no more coming round please, it will really disturb him and make it hard for him to work.
They can't ask for things any more as he might need them for work, so they'll have to ask their mum instead.
If they comply, maybe do a special tea or BBQ once this summer and make them special guests to say thanks for understanding.
Change their status from daily nuisance to invited and wanted
same here OP. I am a bit shifty in the garden, tend to check the fence for watchers. Have grown to accept that they will be hanging over it at some point everyday. They do as someone else has mentioned, just stand there shouting DD;s name. When they do come in to play they are just a fucking nightmare, want this, want that, want that, want thisw....endless asking. wanting everything insight. parents are both quite young, father is largely disinterested in them on a personal level. mostly shouts at them. I feel sorry for them, eldest has really bad exczema next one has a very bad stutter. the eldest one just never stops talking.
we are leaving for the summer and thanks be to god they are off at the end of august. it really has got me down, they have bugged the shit out of all of us.
I jsut say no now even if their mum is there. I say that I have got such and such to do, see ya later. you have my sympathies though.
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