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To not care how 'friendly' your dog is, if you can't control it, it should be on a lead

(246 Posts)
IcouldstillbeJoseph Thu 18-Jul-13 03:20:54

I'm neither a lover or hater of dogs but this is beginning to piss me right off rankle.

Near to where I live is a lovely lake. Nice path, children's play area, ducks etc. Popular in this weather.

I was out walking today with DS 2.6 and DD 6mo. As has happened on so many occasions now, we'll be stood feeding the ducks, only to have somebody's dog come bounding along to us, no owner in sight (the path is quite bendy) and start sniffing about. Now, obviously the sniffing I don't mind so much but DS is a bit wary of dogs and today one started trying to lick his face and was licking at DD's feet in the buggy. The owner then saunters around the corner, calling dog's name (to which it pays no attention) and then looks endearingly at the dog and at DS's worried expression and says "oh don't worry she just wants to give you kisses". No attempt to get control of the dog at all.

I gave tight-lipped half smile and turned away resisting urge to wipe DD feet with an anti-bac wipe

newestbridearound Thu 18-Jul-13 09:26:46


I absolutely hate this too.

YANBU. I cocked up this morning, and the puppy practically ran into the jaws of an on lead staff that clearly did not want to be approached. My error, and thankfully no harm done. Next time I will lead him immediately. I would have apologised, but the staff's owner let his other dog directly approach my on lead bastard spaniel, causing some argy bargy. I figure we're even. Anyway, I would always lead my dogs around young children. The bastard spaniel never approaches people, but the puppy would canon ball into them.

PoppadomPreach Thu 18-Jul-13 09:33:10

i absolutely LOVE dogs but am in total agreement with you OP.


Bogeyface Thu 18-Jul-13 09:33:34

"You must teach your children how to behave around dogs"

Errrr no actually, you should keep your fucking dog away from me and my children!

TroublesomeEx Thu 18-Jul-13 09:33:51

For those saying we should teach our children to not be afraid of dogs...

Most of the children who are scared of dogs are because one (or more) has 'worried' them, jumped up at them, bounded towards them etc.

My son was scared of dogs from being 4 until he grew older and was taller than most of them. Until a dog ran up to him and fussed him, he wasn't in the slightest bit bothered by them. I had brought him up to have a healthy respect - don't stroke/approach dogs you don't know without us checking that it's ok with the owner first, and all that.

but that was all undone at 4 years old. And not knowing anyone with a dog as a pet, it was hard to expose him to friendly dogs to get past it.

Surely it would be more beneficial for some dog owners to not allow the fears to develop in the first place!

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 09:40:57

Bogeyface - maybe it depends where you go/socialise, but as we spend most of our time on the moors & beach and 90% of our friends have dogs ds2's behaviour around dogs was a real problem. His fear of friendly dogs behaving perfectly normally did have to be overcome because it was impacting on him. I did see it as something that needed to be sorted, especially when people stopped inviting him to their houses to play with his friends because he was so scared of dogs.

He was terrified of swimming/water as well until recently. By the time he got to nearly 11 this was a problem because again he was missing out on things - he was too old for special arrangements in pool parties etc. So we organised 1:1 swimming lessons and now he dives, jumps in, swims in pyjamas etc.

I just saw the dog stuff as the same as the swimming issues (actually more of a problem because swimming parties could be missed without too much problem, but being unable to go to the majority of friend's houses was a much bigger thing to miss)

quoteunquote Thu 18-Jul-13 09:50:25

calling dog's name

The owner has no idea about dog training, the dog's name is just that it's name not a command, so that always gives you a clue as to how the dog is being managed.

(to which it pays no attention)

Not surprising, if someone repetitively said your name all the time you would start blanking them too.

"oh don't worry she just wants to give you kisses".

No one would have to worry if you took responsibility and learnt to control your dog.

Sorry you met a rubbish owner, we are not all like that, it is annoying these people cause problems, because it gives good owners a bad name.

People can be arrogant, they see it as some sort of weakness to acknowledge they guidance prior to taking on a dog,

If you put in the correct training when you get the puppy, you are set for life, most don't even do half of what is required, every month you leave it, doubles the amount of training that will need to go in, by six months, they realise the foundations are missing, but rather than address the void, they spend the 12 years trying to get everyone else to go along with ignoring the problem.

It is entirely the owners responsibility to meet the dog's need, their choice if they want to do that, most are too lazy.

We do free pre dog owning classes, the success rate(none troublesome K9) for those owner (new and old) who do them is very high, considering it is free, it shocking how many people turn up six to nine months down the line begging for help to fix the dog, yet had no intention from the outset of educating themselves on K9 psychology,

It is also amazing considering how much they "loved" the dog they are reluctant to put in the required effort.

TroublesomeEx Thu 18-Jul-13 09:52:15



AltogetherAndrews Thu 18-Jul-13 09:58:11

I'm badly allergic to dogs. I don't want to be licked or jumped on by something that will make me ill. Dd has allergies too, so I don't want anyone's dog near her either.

Both my kids are a bit frightened of dogs, but that is probably because I freeze and am not even remotely friendly when we are approached by one. Because, no matter how friendly or lovely you think your dog is being, letting him lick me will make me ill.

I don't dislike dogs, just selfish owners who make no effort to control them.

sleeplessbunny Thu 18-Jul-13 09:58:56


hate this

kisses?? ewww
no i do NOT want an animal (or human for that matter) to lick my face. really.

showmethemummy Thu 18-Jul-13 10:04:57

YA-SO -NBU. my three dds are all now wary of dogs. when they're generally relaxed and not tired/ hot/sick/hungry/thirsty which is never it's just a slight wariness. when there's anything else bothering them the sight of dogs on the loose cause mayhem

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 10:08:21

BTW I don't think the OP is unreasonable. I keep my dog away from children (and I ask approaching children not to stroke him) & don't let him run off lead where there are lots of people picnicking etc. He goes straight back on the lead if he bothers someone (but because I choose my spots carefully I can't really remember the last time that happened). I do keep him away from dogs on leads as well as I assume they don't want to be approached but that's a lot harder than keeping him away from people who are ignoring him and we do very occasionally get it wrong - he is learning though.

TBH of all the dogs I see there's only one that I think has a highly irresponsible owner. I also think that dog is going to kill or badly another dog one day (she seems safe around people - but has terrible dog aggression) so we give her a wide berth. There are other dogs I know that need avoiding but they have sensible owners which makes it a lot easier, even if sometimes greetings go a little wrong.

spacegoat Thu 18-Jul-13 10:11:43

"You must teach your children how to behave around dogs"Errrr no actually, you should keep your fucking dog away from me and my children!

Well, yes but some children run up to dogs on leads. That's dangerous too.

I don't want to be kissed by anything that licks it's own genitals and bumhole and can't brush its teeth <standards>

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 10:18:17

Agree with that spacegoat

Also my suggestion to teach children how to behave around dogs was as a result of seeing ds2 escalate every situation he was in with a dog by his behaviour. I did work hard to teach him how to respond to make it easier for him . Not because I think rampaging dogs should be allowed. This was in terms of his response to friendly dogs and family pets with sensible owners - the problems he was having were as a result of his behaviour.

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 10:19:37

And allowing your dog to lick someone and then say it's just kissing you is clearly bonkers, but I haven't ever met anyone like that tbh. Usually people apologise if their dog drools everywhere.

Parmarella Thu 18-Jul-13 10:25:54

All of you comparing dogs and kids...

I have lived all over te word, and ONLY in Britain do kids have a comparable social status to dogs.

In a next lfe, I would lie to come back as a dog in England please.

Also, my kids do not run up to you, wedge their noses in your crotch and jump up at you, even on days they feel friendly.

Owllady Thu 18-Jul-13 10:26:37

god I can't stand nutters who think dogs give other people/themselves kisses
wtf is it all about?! bark bark

if you live Beds and want to get used to a nice dog, my old one is lovely. She is a very sensible dog and would not lick anyone without invitation (unlike the other dog who think sthe world and strangers revolve her so she kept on lead wink )

Owllady Thu 18-Jul-13 10:29:15

saintly, I don't think we need explain our two children to parmarella winkgrin

Nancy66 Thu 18-Jul-13 10:37:46

The people who let their dogs go a long way ahead or behind them are also the ones who never pick up their shit. A deliberate 'I can't see it, so therefore I don't have to deal with it' action.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CerealMom Thu 18-Jul-13 10:46:43

I'm with Chickens - and I have a dog!

I swear I'm the only one in the village to walk around with a filled poo bag. No it's not a fashion accessory.

Erm, not that I walk around all the time with a filled bag. Just when I walk the dog and only when he poos :-)

saintlyjimjams Thu 18-Jul-13 10:47:26

ha ha ha ha ha owllady -the thought did occur to me - errrr.

I do remember when ds1 was a puppy and in the middle of an otherwise empty beach we came across a picnic blanket with a fruit bowl containing about 12 apples. My first though was 'shiiiiit which one do I grab?' as ds1 and the dog were spread out. I decided a teenager nabbing an apple and running off was probably more socially acceptable than a dog so the dog was grabbed and missed out that day.

And ds1 did grab an apple and luckily the fruit bowl owners laughed and offered him another one (none for the dog though grin )

Owllady Thu 18-Jul-13 10:51:38

he's fab grin

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