AIBU to ask what's the Strangest/cheekiest thing you've said NO to?(153 Posts)
First time poster, I like the collective wisdom of mumsnetters so I wanted to check if I was being unreasonable.
Several things have bugged me recently, I've noticed I'm a "yes" person even when I really DO NOT want to do something. I even annoy myself so I read a book called the power of no and put it into practice.
So the things I've said no to this week are:
1. Shift swap (even when the guilt trip was used).
2. Lending a dress to someone who returned the last one with dubious stains on it and when I commented she said she had to go commando to avoid VPL.
3. Lending money to someone who "needed" it to buy chicken to freeze for winter?!
4. Babysitting for someone who asks for an hour then returns the next morning and moans because her kids are wearing yesterday's clothes (I should have put my own kids clothes on them) my youngest is 4 years older than her oldest!
Either I'm getting more intolerant or people are getting cheesier and weirder (is that a word)?
I have said no
repeatedlyto shift swaps so someone could go to college on Tuesdays, the very day I was going to college, and she knew that. She is a quailified nurse in the country she comes from, I was doing an access course in order to become a nurse. My need was greater than hers and I had picked the night shifts I do specifically to fit in with that.
It sounds like you know some very odd people. i can't think of anything really cheeky that has been asked of me. Although I fear I am probably a bit of a yes person.
Years ago, the mum of a friend of DD's invited all of DD's friends to her child's birthday party and excluded my DD. Then asked me to help her prepare the party food!
I have also in the past year ditched a very cheeky, entitled friend who made constant cheeky requests for things like babysitting, borrowing money, borrowing items, getting lifts etc. All the time. And then had tantrums when I said no
Many years ago, I was the proud owner of my first car, brand new, bought with my own money - it was a matter of months old. A work colleague asked to borrow it for a week as he didn't want to/couldn't rent one. I did manage to say no to that one without hesitation, and still can't imagine why he thought it was worth asking. I am usually a yes person too.
You do seem to know some rather odd people.
A colleague, who'd been with the company all of a week, asked me to lend him money so he could pay his rent (so hundreds rather than £20 or whatever). The answer was no, funnily enough. I'm a people pleaser and that was too much even for me! . Ooh, and a different colleague asked me if I'd do her Saturday for her, and in return she'd do my shift on..... Tuesday. So, swap a rare weekend day off for a weekday off? Don't think so love!
A 'friend' couldn't understand that despite being in the early, very pukey nauseous stages of pregnancy, having my dad visiting for a week from abroad, and burying my DMil, I didn't jump at the chance of nannying her kids for Easter week. "But, I'll pay you", was supposed to change my mind.
I deleted her from my life, very easily, and so have many others.
this week I have said to:
being begged to get pissed out of my face by inlaws at a bbq
my 5 year old asking me to count to 11000
I passed up the opportunity to take one of DHs colleagues wifes parents to the airport at 4am. What was I thinking. The man had the balls to say that 'since Kreech doesn't go to work, she won't mind'. Fortunately DH said no for me.
The golden chance to put 50 ringett (about a tenner) into the collection for DDs teacher. He is a useless Berk.
DD herself takes the biscuit though. She is going through a Dr Who phase ATM and had sourced a bundle of stuff on eBay. Bless her, she'd put a delivery address and everything into the box, she just wanted my credit card number.
I said no to giving a neighbour my broadband password.
The guy was a known drug user, ex-heroin addict (at the time, I believe he is now back on it) and drug dealer. Thankfully he is also now an ex-neighbour.
Just the other day I got a facebook message from an ex-colleague (from years ago, we don't really keep in touch), saying that he is coming to my city to see a gig and "could he and his brother "crash" at mine for a couple of nights??!"
Well of course I said NO...I told him I have two young children, I work nights and I don't run a free guesthouse for people I hardly know...and he can google hotels like everyone else.
Bit harsh I know, but I was pretty pissed off at the cheek of it all.
Sometimes I think I live in Jeremy Kyle land, full of people who have a warped sense of reality, who don't have their own teeth and sleep with each others partners and don't know who the fathers of their children are! I know they're not all like that on JK but sometimes....
Not as bad as some on here but I was once stood eating my sandwich outside work when a total stranger walked past and asked if he could have a few bites cos he was really hungry! I laughed it off politely but then realised he was deadly serious. Wtf is wrong with some people?!
My colleague who I don't really know very well- on hearing I was pregnant cones over to me and starts lifting up my top and saying 'I want to look at your belly'. I tapped her hand away and gave her a look 'don't think so'.
Such a bizarre thing to do it was weird
BB that is hilarious!
I don't have anything to add to this thread, the people I know seem eminently reasonable, but I just wanted to add my about all of these, especially OP babysiting overnight.
Why is wrong with some people?!
Once upon a time, my housemate's 2 male friends turned up one evening and decided to dress up in drag (using my housemate's clothes) to go to a techno dance party. Having shaved their legs and left the hairs in our bathroom sink, one of them tapped on my door and we had the following conversation:
Dragboy: have you got any aftershave I could borrow?
BB: I know I'm tall for a girl, but unlike you, I'm not a boy in drag and I don't shave. So no. And thanks so much for thinking that I might.
Dragboy: But I NEED to put some aftershave on. Or I'll get spots! Have you got ANYTHING I could use?
BB:Well, there's some vinegar in the kitchen cupboard, if you don't mind smelling like a fish supper. You loon.
Best friend found a horse show to go to which involved fancy dress classes. Show is 2nd weekend in december. We usually go together with the ponies (I have a DD who would love to go and do sparkly fancy dress) and share the cost of diesel and help each other out.
She was pretty pissed off when I said no and had a bit of a strop.
I am pregnant, 17 weeks at the mo. And am due on 20/12, 1 week before said show. Don't think I was being unreasonable lol.
Same friend also mentioned that she fancied tenerife at christmas. I pointed out that I would be unable to commit to looking after ponies as I would be 40+ weeks PG or have a newborn.
Don't think she gets it yet lol.
This could totally out me. About a year after I left my ex, he phoned asking if he could move into my loft space (it is large and would be livable in).
He wanted to rent out our house (that I had moved out of) for an income, and basically be in my house 24/7.
When I told him that wouldn't work for me, he started ranting down the phone and telling me that I was the most evil bitch he had ever known. It seemed to pass him by that, if that was true, it was a very strange request to make...
Our next door neighbour who we barley knew asking to borrow our car!
One woman i work with was trying to ask our manager if she could leave early on one of her shifts the next week as she had an important appointment. Unfortunately our manager had to decline as I already had my 20 week scan that day and so she needed the other woman in to make sure the floor was covered while I was at the scan.
This woman just came and asked me if it was possible for me to rebook my scan to another date as she had a really important hairdressing appointment!!!
My ex husband worked as a chef in London. I used to frequently get calls to go and pick him up after an evening shift at 1 a.m- even when I was pregnant and afterwards, when I had a tiny ds1.
But the worst one was when he and a colleague got the train home, fell asleep and woke up at some station way down the line- can't remember where exactly, but it was a good 20 miles away. His colleague refused to ring his wife, saying he knew exactly what answer he would get, but my XH thought it would be fine to ring me and drag me and 2 month old ds1 out of bed at 2 in the morning. IIRC hysterical laughter and 'Fuck off' were all that came out of my disbelieving mouth...
Someone I used to work with asked if her sister (who I had never met) could move in with me during the week for a few months - rent free. Funnily enough I said no to that!
Should add that I no longer worked with that person and hadn't for a couple of years at that point!
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