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to hate the term "baby mother" and want to throw things when I hear it?

(33 Posts)
JakeBullet Thu 11-Jul-13 09:35:27

FGS, what IS that term and where did it come from? Jeremy Kyle has just used it (okay so I am BVVVU watching JK but need something to distract me from the mind numbing boredom of housework).

But "Baby mother"? WTAF is it all about?

AIBU to bloody well hate it?

Or am I just an old fashioned and ancient crone?

Gullygirl Thu 11-Jul-13 09:45:42

YANBU.It is a horrible, horrible term.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack Thu 11-Jul-13 09:48:26

Never heard of it! Is that because I don't watch JK? smile

SarahAndFuck Thu 11-Jul-13 09:50:10

I've never heard it before.

What does it mean and who was he talking to when he used it?

FlowersBlown Thu 11-Jul-13 09:52:38

I think the origins are in Jamaican patois. It refers to a person who you have a child with but are not in a relationship with. You can use the father version too.

SarahAndFuck Thu 11-Jul-13 09:53:37

Is it just a slightly quicker way to say "baby's mother", as in "You are the baby's mother, ACT LIKE IT!" but missing out the 's. Or if he's shouting at some feckless waster of a man who is treating his child's mother badly "She is your baby mother, ACT LIKE IT!"

Or was he describing a very young teen who has just had a baby and he's implying she is almost a baby herself?

Either way, you are right, it's annoying.

SavoyCabbage Thu 11-Jul-13 09:54:51

It comes from America where baby daddy is a term in some places used about biological fathers who are not involved with raising their children.

Sometimes it can give you a raised status in society if the man has one.

SarahAndFuck Thu 11-Jul-13 09:55:10

Flowers - so it's used a bit like "my ex" then, but to inform you also have a child together?

FlowersBlown Thu 11-Jul-13 09:56:58

It's quite a useful term really. Plenty people have children with people that they are not and never have been in a relationship with, so ex-husband or whatever doesn't really describe the situation.

ISeeSmallPeople Thu 11-Jul-13 09:58:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mitzyme Thu 11-Jul-13 09:59:46

I HATE it.

burberryqueen Thu 11-Jul-13 09:59:55

it is a Caribbean thing i think, from the days of slavery when men were used as studs and did not have a relationship with the 'babymother'

youmeatsix Thu 11-Jul-13 10:00:14

so no one here watches Maury?? shock "baby mama drama" all over the place there!grin

Leviticus Thu 11-Jul-13 10:04:41

YANBU! Hate it. I don't care where it came from it sounds degrading.

Shrugged Thu 11-Jul-13 10:06:37

My partner was once on jury duty, and a barrister had to explain to an elderly, very patrician judge, what a 'baby father' was.

EagleRiderDirk Thu 11-Jul-13 10:56:23

Its awful - YANBU

SooticaTheWitchesCat Thu 11-Jul-13 11:26:49

It's a Caribbean thing definitley. 2 people at work use that term a lot and I think it is awful too so YANBU

ScarletLady02 Thu 11-Jul-13 12:05:25

I agree with the Carribean descent. You hear it in patois a lot. DH has been known to use it on occasion as he grew up with a lot of Jamaican friends. Can't say I'm a fan, but he doesn't use it in a derogatory way, it's just a phrase he grew up with.

thedizzy1 Thu 11-Jul-13 18:11:10

I hate and detest this phrase. It is often used by friends of my dp, mainly because they all share a Caribbean background. I find it demeaning to be honest, as if that persons identity and worth is solely measured in relation to the baby, and as if it negates any relationship with the mother or father of the child.

JakeBullet Thu 11-Jul-13 18:14:10

I sort of got that it was a patois thing but I just want to shriek "you're white and grew up in the UK. Get over it"!

pleiadianpony Thu 11-Jul-13 18:21:07

..or 'Baby Mo' for short. The term is losing popularity apparently. Having a 'baby mo' isn't really a status symbol amongst young British men like it was a few years ago. I think they've wised up to realise that can actually be experienced as a form of oppression.

ARealDame Thu 11-Jul-13 18:31:37

TG for small mercies.

dirtyface Thu 11-Jul-13 18:35:05


round where i live its a common term

as is "babydaddy" (usually prounounced babydaddEH )


NotQuitePerfect Thu 11-Jul-13 18:47:09

It is an absolutely dreadful term.

I remember James Cordon using it in reference to his girlfriend in an acceptance speech a while ago. Tosser angry

dirtyface Thu 11-Jul-13 19:54:48

really notquite what a nob sad

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