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Should these children have been allowed to go to the toilets unattended?

(98 Posts)
FourArms Wed 10-Jul-13 20:30:35

I know I know this gets discussed all the time.. but there is a twist on this one!

I was picking up DS from a Beavers trip tonight and arrived a little early. Whilst I was there, I overheard a child ask to go to the toilet. The Beavers leader asked if he wanted anyone to go with him. He said yes. Then another Beaver said they knew were the toilets were, so they were sent in together.

So, two children, aged around 6/7, whose parents weren't there, went to the toilet themselves in an sports centre type environment. We were outside, loos inside a building and not visible from where we were.

Because I was picking up the child sent to accompany the first child, I discreetly observed them to ensure they were OK. Nobody else monitored their return.

Is this OK? I would not like my DS to go to the toilet himself under these circumstances (children opposite sexes so didn't go in to toilets together). When I took him later, he got stuck in there because the door was too heavy, but it's the risk of something much more unlikely happening that concerns me.

AIBU to think they shouldn't have allowed this? Is there a regulation about it? I know it wouldn't have been allowed on the school trips that I've accompanied.

KobayashiMaru Wed 10-Jul-13 20:32:10

If the leader brought every child alone to the toilet, who would be minding the rest of them? And when would they get to do anything else?

FourArms Wed 10-Jul-13 20:35:25

There were four leaders there.

Turniptwirl Wed 10-Jul-13 20:35:26

Was in the park with brownies last week and (having asked them to go to the toilet when before we left) a child needing the toilet was sent with an older girl, I'm the end about four of them went. If one had got stuck, one of the others would have run back to us.

You can't be alone with a child so either two adults or two children wouldve had to go

Wholetthedogin Wed 10-Jul-13 20:36:16

6/7 is fine to me for a wee bit of independence in going to the toilet. I think it's OK. Would be happy for my DD to go alone at that age and in those circumstances.

ParadiseChick Wed 10-Jul-13 20:36:29


mumblechum1 Wed 10-Jul-13 20:37:31

I think it's fine.

Sirzy Wed 10-Jul-13 20:37:42

So you want one leader to go into the toilets with 2 children? That in itself is a big child protection no no.

You can't follow every child to the toilet.

BarbarianMum Wed 10-Jul-13 20:37:46

I would be fine with this, it's standard practice to send two together at my son's Beavers.

curlew Wed 10-Jul-13 20:38:01

Perfectly fine- they were 6/7 not 3/4

CrowsLanding Wed 10-Jul-13 20:39:26

Yabu. Of course a 6/7 year old can go to the loo alone. hmm

TheCutOfYourJib Wed 10-Jul-13 20:39:56

Yes it's fine.

CrowsLanding Wed 10-Jul-13 20:40:43

Op. What was the 'twist' to this story? just out of interest smile

Chottie Wed 10-Jul-13 20:41:24

I would be fine with this too. The boys were familiar with the layout of the building so would not get lost. They were together too.

Tobagostreet Wed 10-Jul-13 20:42:55

Sorry - YABU

Nothing wrong with this.

HeySoulSister Wed 10-Jul-13 20:45:15

Oh dear op..... Yabu

usualsuspect Wed 10-Jul-13 20:45:37

Perfectly fine

Iwaswatchingthat Wed 10-Jul-13 20:47:09

I would not be happy my child of that age going to the toilet alone or with another child the same age in a public sports hall unsupervised. The leader should have done a group toilet trip at the start of the visit. Maybe I am overprotective, but that really does not sit well with me.

FourArms Wed 10-Jul-13 20:47:13

Twist - they were in someone else's care. They didn't go together - opposite sexes. Girl showed boy were loos were & returned.

Interesting that most happy with this. If my DS had been the boy he would have been trapped in there as the door was too heavy for him to open (had to send older brother to help when I heard shout) and he'd have been very distressed.

Where are the guidelines re 2 adults?

FourArms Wed 10-Jul-13 20:48:08

where loos were!

ihearsounds Wed 10-Jul-13 20:48:34

The alternative would have been the child peeing/pooing themselves. Adult cannot put themselves in a situation of accusations made against them, so wont accompany a child alone. Then there's child/adult ratio's and by taking 2 members of staff out of the room with the beavers, they would not adhering to this.

curlew Wed 10-Jul-13 20:48:48

The door was too heavy for a 7 year old? Where was it, Fort Knox?

TheMagicKeyCanFuckOff Wed 10-Jul-13 20:56:07


Most NT 6/7yos can go to the toilet themselves, surely? I would be fine with it.

HildaOgden Wed 10-Jul-13 20:57:41

There isn't a paedophile lurking in every corner.Just thought I'd reassure you of that.

That being said,I think it would have been good practice for the leaders to split up into 2 sets of 2,and bring the whole group for a toilet break at some stage during the trip (2 leaders supervising girls,2 leaders supervising boys).

SauvignonBlanche Wed 10-Jul-13 20:58:22

YABU, it sounds fine to me.

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