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(93 Posts)
sonlypuppyfat Fri 05-Jul-13 11:48:28

AIBU in when I introduce myself as Deborah my name shouldn't be shortened to Debbie if I wanted to call myself Debbie I would say its Debbie wouldn't I? I don't automatically shorten other peoples names, and yes I know its silly but it drives me mad!

Sparklingbrook Fri 05-Jul-13 11:50:38

YANBU. Same with Amanda. My friend is Amanda and gets peed off with people assuming she is Mandy.

angelos02 Fri 05-Jul-13 11:52:10

YABU. tis precious

ephemeralfairy Fri 05-Jul-13 11:53:01

Totally agree. My name often gets shortened, it is presumptuous and rude. I have to correct people and nip it in the bud early!! I always ask what name someone wants to be known by. YANBU!

sonlypuppyfat Fri 05-Jul-13 11:54:02

Glad its not just me. When I was at school no one shortened my name but whe I got to my 30s all of a sudden I had a new name people would call out Debbie in the street and I'd just ignore them thinking well they can't be talking to me

Sparklingbrook Fri 05-Jul-13 11:54:31

How is it precious angelos? Debbie isn't sonly's name. confused

Onesleeptillwembley Fri 05-Jul-13 11:56:50

It's incredibly rude to just change someone's name like that. Basic manners.

Bowlersarm Fri 05-Jul-13 11:57:35

It's quite rude, but human nature. People are always shortening names if they are long, or in my DH's case, lengthening them if they are short.

YANBU but I'm surprised you're not used to it by now.

thebody Fri 05-Jul-13 11:58:01

I have a friend called Deborah who would knock your block off if you called her Debbie. She likes Deb though.

angelos02 Fri 05-Jul-13 11:59:33

I think it is people just being friendly. I got called 'love' about 5 times when signing something for the postman earlier today. Some people get a bee in their bonnet about that on MN. Again, I just think it is people being friendly.

TinyTear Fri 05-Jul-13 11:59:41

If you want to be called X you are entitled to be called X

I hate people who create nicknames and short forms out of everything

angelos02 Fri 05-Jul-13 11:59:56

YY to it being human nature.


internationallove985 Fri 05-Jul-13 12:00:08

No Y.N.B.U it's your name! and if you don't want it shortened then that's your choice. xxx

pussycatwillum Fri 05-Jul-13 12:04:37

I have the same problem. My DH calls me by the short form of my name, so people he talks about me to tend to assume that is how I am known. If I say my name though I always use the longer form. It does annoy me, so YANBU.

eurozammo Fri 05-Jul-13 12:08:41

YANBU at all.

It's normal in a professional context to ask a new employee or contact whether they prefer tom or thomas or whatever.

limitedperiodonly Fri 05-Jul-13 12:09:21

My line manager was a compulsive name shortener. He thought it was matey. He was a tosser. Sharing office space was bad enough; I didn't want to be his mate.

Deborah became Debs, Caroline was Cal, Gary was Gal, Neil was Neil because you can't really do much with that.

He was Col, short for Colin. He used to keep asking me to call him that but I couldn't. It's not a name.I would try to ignore him as much as I could get away with unless he used my proper name. He probably thought I was a stuck up bitch.

Our very, very scary boss was called Roland. Funnily enough, Col never called him Ro.

Startail Fri 05-Jul-13 12:11:12

People will shorten your name, it's automatic if the Amanda, Rosemary or Eleanor you already know always does.

You are perfectly allowed to ask politely for people not to do it. I always do the opposite and politely ask people to shorten my name. I've never used the full version and don't turn round if anyone uses it. It's a common name and the full version often means someone else in the room.

What is incredibly rude OP is not asking politely for your full name, but snapping like a ungrateful five year old.

Yes colleague at work, I got it wrong, once in three fucking years. I don't recon that's bad given I have a cousin Rosie, who has never been Rosemary in her entire life.

sonlypuppyfat Fri 05-Jul-13 12:14:25

Who said I snapped?

musicposy Fri 05-Jul-13 12:16:02

One of my friends is Rebecca and her whole life people have tried to call her Becky, which she hates. I remember teachers at school actually getting cross with her and telling her not to be so rude for telling them not to call her Becky!
DH tries to shorten one of our friend's DH's to Dave (he's David) which he also hates. Trying to remind DH he is not being matey, he's being rude, is like fighting a losing battle. Sigh.

RaisingChaotic Fri 05-Jul-13 12:17:28

I get called allsorts grin doesn't bother me. However, I wouldn't shorten someone else's name unless I knew they were happy for me to do so. Some people don't like having their name shortened, it doesn't make them precious.


WildlingPrincess Fri 05-Jul-13 12:20:46

I have quite a short name so have people lengthening it, or making up a new, longer name. Why??!!


limitedperiodonly Fri 05-Jul-13 12:21:03

music When my friends were discussing baby names, the DH suggested Dave. My friend said: 'David? I hadn't considered that. It's quite nice, bit old, though.'

He said: 'No, I meant Dave. David's poncey.'

ZenGardener Fri 05-Jul-13 12:21:24

I worked with a man called William. I always called him William as I assumed that if he wanted to be called Will or Bill he would introduce himself as such. It did feel weird though.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds Fri 05-Jul-13 12:23:41

Limited that's like my friends who named their oldest Jake. NOT Jacob or Jonathan with Jake as a nickname but Jake on his birth certificate.

IneedAsockamnesty Fri 05-Jul-13 12:24:32

When you introduce yourself to someone you normally use the name you answer to.

Hi I'm Tom means that persons name is Tom.

Hi I'm Thomas means that persons name is Thomas.

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