To think that 'bridesmaid duties' should be no more that turning up, wearing a dress and getting pissed

[LeGavrOrf]

Reading the thread about the country wedding.

Lots of comments that bridesmaids have to conduct duties for the bride all day, serious role and all that.

I have only been a bridesmaid once, I just turned up, had my hair done, went to the wedding, had some photos and then partied like everyone else.

Was I a spectacularly crap bridesmaid for not playing lady in waiting to the bride all day?

[cornyblend37]

I also thought that was all bridesmaids did - what else is there to do?

[LeGavrOrf]

One of the other bridesmaids (the bride's sister) carried a small bag for the bride's lipstick and fags. and I think that was it as far as duties.

[MmeLindor]

I seem to remember something about being present at the showing of the presents and at the Henny Night.

Was I supposed to do more than that?

[LeGavrOrf]

I think we are normal corny.

[superbagpuss]

my ex friend discommunicated me after her wedding

not sure where I went wrong but obviously I was a crap bridesmaid

[thebody]

Omg, I shagged the groom!! Shit!! Thought that was a duty, that lying bastard!!!

[Thereistoomuchconfusion]

I helped my Friend on to the toilet as her dress was huge!!, but otherwise just partied on and was the most pissed one there!! Whoops!!

[Annunziata]

My mum has this thing where the bridesmaid has to make the wedding bed up

[LeGavrOrf]

I was there for the present opening (the day after the wedding, all stupendously hungover and drinking hair of the dog drinks) and the hen night.

I didn't serenely cater to the brides whims all day though. We did go to the loo with her to make sure there were no dress tucking in accidents (towards the beginning of the day, when the drinking had started it was each man and their frock for themselves )

[Primafacie]

YATotallyNBU.

See, I chose my closest friend to be my bridesmaid. It was my way of saying I loved her, and to thank her for being a good friend.

I just don't understand competitive friendship. All this stuff about bridesmaid duties is utterly nuts - why would anyone want their friends to be miserable?

[cornyblend37]

My sister was very cross for me for shaving the sides of my head a few months before her wedding. It didn't matter as I had to wear a hideous pink flowery halo anyway.
I'm glad I'm normal though.

My bridesmaids mostly threw flowers about, sulked, wet themselves and refused to be in the pictures. But that's what happens when you allow your nieces to join in.

[cornyblend37]

making the wedding bed up...that's hilarious

[Wallison]

You lot are clearly very slack bridesmaids. When I was a bridesmaid, I did everything for the bride - peeled her grapes, wiped her arse, fanned her etc. I even said her vows for her. Fucking ungrateful cow had a right old go at me.

[Trills]

Depends on how demanding/needy the bride is.

What the duties should be above all else is made explicit in advance.

[LRDLearningDomHome]

True.

However, I will admit my bridesmaid also did sterling amounts of 'yeah, he's lovely, have another cocktail and keep on with the creamcakes', and that was appreciated too.

Maybe fannying around for a day in wedding-dress shops? Opt-in only, though, I think.

Oh, no, wait, I lie. I try to sound all nice (and I did let mine choose their own dresses and they looked gorgeous), but I also made mine engage in strenuous physical labour for the entire ceremony. They had to hold metal crowns in the air over mine and DH's thread for something like 30-40 minutes.

God bless them.

[Maryann1975]

I think you have the majority of the duties covered. I went to a couple of dress shopping sessions, but tbh it was a bit of a waste of time. Bride had seen what she wanted in a magazine, so looking at others was a waste of time. (Apart from when my baby filled her nappy while brides posh mother was holding her, the nappy leaked everywhere. It was very amusing).
Bride was a bit of a zilla so planned everything to within an inch of its life. She planned the hen night which I went to part of and then on the day, show up, get dressed, follow her down the aisle then had a few drinks. Obviously they were a lovely bride and groom, it was the husband and wife bit after they had problems with. They divorced after 12 months. I was glad I hadn't done more running around for them, it would have been such a waste (as was the very expensive dinner service everyone helped to buy,it was thrown down the stairs in a fit of temper).

[FreudiansSlipper]

I was best woman :)

No bridesmaids, helped friend get ready, got bottle lf champagne forus tp drink while getting ready, rang reception to get spme glasses and nibbles, carried some flowers, gave a speach, got pissed and managed to look after ds (no partners with me)

Do not think I was expected to dedicate my day entirely to my friend but if she was expecting that and that sort of person we would not be friends

[LeGavrOrf]

I feel very cheated actually.

Every wedding I have been to has been perfectly normal with sensible brides and no inter family wars and silly behaviour,

I need to cultivate new friends.

[DeathByTray]

When I was 17, I was not only my friend's bridesmaid, I was chief bridesmaid!!

As far as I was concerned, I had gone beyond the call of duty when she put me in a lilac nylon dress. Oh, and I gave the bride a brandy before she walked down the aisle.

Job done.

[thebody]

Making the bridal bed? Sounds barbera Cartland and de flowering virgins!!!

[TheCraicDealer]

OP, I've just read your "I hope the bride gets the shits" comment on the other thread. I like you.

[LRDLearningDomHome]

I'll get divorced pronto, GetOrf.

I never was that keen on DH anyway.

[PatriciaHolm]

I didn't have any. Am I not properly married?