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Wibu to breastfeed my friends baby?

(304 Posts)
thepigflu Mon 01-Jul-13 12:51:55

So he's been crying for 45 minutes, my friend has only been away for 2 and a half hours, she said she'd be about 3hours but she's not answering her phone. I've tried everything but he's so distressed, twisting his head around searching for a feed. I'm not sure how my friend would take it but I'm thinking I'll just feed him, is that wrong?

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Mon 01-Jul-13 12:58:58

Hepatitis B can also be spread if cracking to the nipples.

libertine73 Mon 01-Jul-13 12:59:06

Oh lord, has she not left a bottle? Very U of her to piss off out, not come back on time, and not leave you with anything angry

Try everything else before you do that though, walking outside, cooled water, suck on a banana, how old is he?

LadyBryan Mon 01-Jul-13 12:59:20

I don't see any problem with it other than the lack of consent.

i don't think you can make such a decision without having raised it first

peachypips Mon 01-Jul-13 12:59:26

I think you are all very weird! If it was my baby crying I'd be glad if someone fed it!

GobblersKnob Mon 01-Jul-13 12:59:51

I would give her the three hours that she said she would be then if she still isn't answering her phone then I would certainly consider it.

If baby was bottle fed and op was asking if she should give him a bit of formula, no-one would bat an eyelid.

It's just food.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip Mon 01-Jul-13 13:00:04

Would a finger in the mouth work? Does he just need to suck? He's very young to leave hungry and crying sad

MrButtercat Mon 01-Jul-13 13:00:19

I'd be livid.

There could be drugs,toxins,medication,nicotine,alcohol let alone HIV or anything else in said bm.

It's up to parents to decide what is fed to their baby.Nice you want to help though.

BeanoNoir Mon 01-Jul-13 13:00:32

I really wouldn't want anyone else to bf my baby. But I'd also leave expressed milk or make sure I was contactable and able to return quickly.

If someone had to bf my baby I'd rather they expressed their milk and fed from a cup, but I still would see it as an absolute last resort. Can you not contact your friend at all? If you can keep distracting baby or go out and walk them I'd do that tbh. 3 hours isn't likely to be life or death situation.

I don't know why I feel that way but the more I think about it the more I'd be upset if someone else bf my baby (34+5 and hormonal)

propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS Mon 01-Jul-13 13:00:40

Good decision, OP smile

CheungFun Mon 01-Jul-13 13:01:16

Sounds grim, I feel for you as it would seem the obvious solution for you to bf him, and it's distressing for you to see the baby upset as well, but I would just stick to walking him outside in the garden or something!

Hopefully next time your friend can leave some expressed milk instead.

threefeethighandrising Mon 01-Jul-13 13:01:28

Personally I'd be very tempted to feed the baby, I'd find it hard not to.

I know am not Hep or HIV +ve as tested while pregnant.

Why has she left a BF baby for so long? He was bound to get distressed.

HeySoulSister Mon 01-Jul-13 13:01:31

Aw he will smell your milk on you.... Make him more stressed?

libertine73 Mon 01-Jul-13 13:01:38

He may just be missing his Mum if he normally goes 3 hours, why isn't she answering her phone though? That would piss me off in itself.

Floggingmolly Mon 01-Jul-13 13:01:52

Why did she leave an exclusively breast fed baby for three hours? Where is she? confused Give him a bottle of water.

dyslexicdespot Mon 01-Jul-13 13:02:02

As a few others have pointed out, HIV is transmitted through breast milk. You might think that you are HIV negative, but so do the vast majority of people who find out that they are not.

Breast feeding someone else's baby without permission is not OK for this reason alone.

MakeGlutenFreeHay Mon 01-Jul-13 13:03:41

I probably wouldn't without consent, but if it was my 3 month old ebf baby I'd personally much rather a friend bf him than gave him a banana to suck! Fgs.

LookingForwardToMarch Mon 01-Jul-13 13:03:52

If my baby was upset and hungry I would want someone to feed them.

But then I also wouldn't leave my baby without some form of food (expressed or formula) if i was going out for more than an hour

threefeethighandrising Mon 01-Jul-13 13:03:59

Why do the mothers (unknown) wishes trump the baby's when she's left him with no milk and is uncontactable?

Wet nursing used to be normal practice.

YoniMatopoeia Mon 01-Jul-13 13:04:52

Why would a mum leave a baby of three months with someone and not leave milk for them?

I just don't understand that at all.

StealthPolarBear Mon 01-Jul-13 13:05:09

I wouldn't do it without discussing it with the mum first. Why has she left an ebf baby for so long without a feed (presumably)

TheToysAreALIVEITellThee Mon 01-Jul-13 13:05:10

Id question my friends boundaries if she had bf my baby. I loved it so much it would have ruined it for me I think to know someone else had bf him

BeanoNoir Mon 01-Jul-13 13:05:27

Tbh reading my post back I'd rather my baby got fed a small amount of formula than someone else's expressed milk. I thought your milk was specifically tailored for your baby?

BeanoNoir Mon 01-Jul-13 13:05:27

Tbh reading my post back I'd rather my baby got fed a small amount of formula than someone else's expressed milk. I thought your milk was specifically tailored for your baby?

MakeGlutenFreeHay Mon 01-Jul-13 13:05:46

With regards to the intimate nature of it, without permission to bf, I'd probably express a bit onto a spoon and feed him some of that.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Mon 01-Jul-13 13:06:04

It wouldn't bother me in the least for a friend to bf my baby if I'd left him for that long without any other form of sustenance. Actually, I do recall ds2 being about 5 months old and staying overnight with a friend (long story) and when nothing else settled him, my friend bf'd him and he went straight to sleep. Never bothered me in the least.

I do naturally recognise that everyone is different and where it didn't and wouldn't bother me, many women would be horrified. I would err on the side of caution and wait until you can get old of his mum. If she's ok with it, go ahead. I hope it calms the poor little mite down.

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