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AIBU about toilet cleanliness?

(33 Posts)
PorkPieandPickle Sun 30-Jun-13 12:20:47

Whenever my DSS (15) stays with us, every time I follow him to the toilet, there is pee all over the seat. Unless my DH is deliberately only peeing on the seat when DSS is here, I can be 100% sure it is DSS. he is a lovely boy in all other ways, and we get along great, but I have to admit it is starting to wind me up.

I have asked DH to mention it to him a few times. I have also said myself on 2 previous occasions when they are both in the room that 'someone' is peeing on the seat and could they lift the seat or clean up after themselves.

This morning I went to the bathroom and desperate for the loo (5 months pregnant- urgently wee a lot!) sat down without looking. Cue wet arse and getting up see yellow liquid in seat. Feel disgusted that I have someone else's pee on me.

When I have cleaned up, I march downstairs where DH and DSS are watching tv, and snap 'I'm not being funny, but whichever one of you keeps pissing on the toilet seat it needs to stop, because it's disgusting, and I'm sick of it'. I went into the kitchen to make a drink. H follows me into the kitchen and says that IBU, and I didn't have to address it in such a manner. I said 'you're both old enough to clean up after yourselves, and maybe you'd be pissed off if you'd sat in someone else's piss on your own loo' he told me I was being ridiculous and slammed the door, and is now not speaking to me.

aibu? I just think its ridiculous to not be allowed to speak out about this orrible habit, it's not like DSS is a little kid who can't clean or doesn't know how.

lillibet1 Sun 30-Jun-13 20:30:18

i don't let my 2.5 year old do it lift the seat or sit down and always clean up

maja00 Sun 30-Jun-13 18:28:51

Difficulty in aiming is no excuse though.

PurplePotato Sun 30-Jun-13 18:18:17

YANBU! But be aware that certain medical issues can make it difficult for boys to aim (a too-tight foreskin, for example). Might be worth getting your DH to have a word with DSS just to make sure there
isn't an actual problem there, other than careless lazy maleness.

maja00 Sun 30-Jun-13 17:14:18


In my house, everyone sits down to pee - why wouldn't you?

Standing up wees are for out of the house only.

TheCatIsUpTheDuff Sun 30-Jun-13 17:10:36

DH is 6'3" and manages to get all the wee in the toilet from a standing position. It's not as though they don't have plenty of opportunities to practise. Piss on the seat is disgusting. Hope your DH's little word helps.

Xiaoxiong Sun 30-Jun-13 15:03:21

ZZZen I don't know why they don't all sit down. Maybe I should nc for this as DH knows my username but my MIL, who should be canonised for many things but this one in particular, brought him up to pee sitting down. DS1 and 2 will absolutely be taught to do the same.

Sometimes we have had male guests over who clearly have aiming difficulties and don't seem to care enough to clean up after themselves. At home, fine it's your house - but at someone else's house?? I'd be mortified!

Bejeena Sun 30-Jun-13 15:00:32

No not unreasonable at all. A few months after we starting going out and he was staying at my house regularly I gave my husband the option to either sit down or clean the toilet every time after he uses it. So he sits down all the time. Just make that rule and problem solved

JazzDalek Sun 30-Jun-13 15:00:14

Was prepared to say YABU as I'm really laissez-faire about germs and dirt, but...YANBU. Sitting on a pissy toilet seat is horrid.

You've asked them and asked them and this is disgusting. You'd every right to flip out.

Fairypants Sun 30-Jun-13 14:54:37

YANBU I have gone to the loo at night only to sit/stand in something wet and it is revolting! I don't mind the seat being left up as long as it isn't covered in wee.
I guess your dp's first reaction was to defend his DS then he thought it through and realised something needs to be done.

Nottalotta Sun 30-Jun-13 14:43:18

Oh and regarding his change of heart - he was probably just being defensive to start with and just reacted. Then thought about and realised that actually its not nice to sit in wee.

Nottalotta Sun 30-Jun-13 14:41:54

Yadnbu. Yuck. I don't understand why men don't just sit down if they struggle to aim. Embarressingly though, i seem to pee in a particularly forceful manner, and started noticing drips under the seat where it had shot forwards! I actually have to lean forwards on the loo to stop this happening!

ZZZenagain Sun 30-Jun-13 14:39:44

why don't they all sit down to do it? Is it difficult or uncomfortable that way?

alemci Sun 30-Jun-13 14:36:04

no, it is disgusting. It seems to be that usually adult women clean up in houses (namely mum). everyone else is oblivious. That is my experience.

Alisvolatpropiis Sun 30-Jun-13 14:17:40


PorkPieandPickle Sun 30-Jun-13 14:07:14

Lol at 'following him' to the loo newatthis!!! We are most definitely a bathroom door locked household.

No idea how he behaves at his mums, I can't particularly imagine her tolerating it, but I don't know her well enough to say for sure.

I agree about teaching future manners- imagine the poor poor girl that moves in with him and has to train him from scratch!!!

Branleuse Sun 30-Jun-13 13:53:10

both of my ds' do this. I make them come back and clean it every time but they still usually forget

WandaDoff Sun 30-Jun-13 13:48:44


There is nothing worse than sitting down into somebody elses cold piss.

Latara Sun 30-Jun-13 13:46:27

YANBU. Good that your DP has seen the light!

At work there are 2 separate loos; 1 is nominally for men and the seat is ALWAYS covered in piss.

I look at my male colleagues and wonder who the offender is; eg: ''was it YOU, Mr posh doctor, who peed on the seat?''

The women's loo is often in use but i only use the men's loo if i'm desperate.

NewAtThisMalarky Sun 30-Jun-13 13:42:56

No wonder he pees on the seat, if you follow him to the toilet - poor boy will be looking over his shoulder!

postmanpatscat Sun 30-Jun-13 13:41:10

DP is 6ft 1 and always sits down to pee as it's too far for it to land in the right place, apparently! Voila - clean loo and seat down, just as I left it!

Roshbegosh Sun 30-Jun-13 13:38:30

So your DSS is just allowed to do that at his mother's and she happily sits in it or wipes it up after him? Mad. You are teaching him some manners, doing him a favour (and his future DP).

Smartieaddict Sun 30-Jun-13 13:32:47

I'm glad to see your DH has seen sense. YADNBU! I have this problem with my 5 year old, I make him clean up after himself, and he makes a big fuss, and says it is disgusting, but at 5 it is at least understandable! I sincerely hope that by the time he is 15 he will be able to leave the toilet in a reasonable state after using it. Thankfully DH and DSS seem to be able to manage it!

PorkPieandPickle Sun 30-Jun-13 13:24:36

Update- DH just apologised to me for his reaction, and said that now he's thought about it, he can understand why I got so angry about sitting in pee!

He has promised to have a word with DSS, and gave me a hug and said he loves me an doesn't want to fall out. So DH has risen back from the 'wanker' label I had mentally put on him... But why the change of heart?! Suddenly suspicious that he is a secret MN prowler and saw this thread...

teenagetantrums Sun 30-Jun-13 13:01:09

I hate it as well, my son is quite good now at 19 after years of being made to clean it up, some of his friends not so good, but if i know them well enough i will shout at them to clean it up,and oddly my DD has a friend who always manages to pee over the seat. How does she do that at 16? I long for my own en suite on day.

ParadiseChick Sun 30-Jun-13 12:58:04

You are not crazy it's rank.

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